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The Myth of finding "THE ONE”

Certain women hold on to a romantic notion that “a Knight in Shining armour” or “a Prince” will appear to sweep her off her feet and live in happiness ever after. While this is the stuff that fairytales are made of, being on CS means facing up to harsh reality.

Reading the blogs and polls, it is easy to conclude that some on CS think that by providing a photograph and writing a profile will magically lead to finding the proverbial “one.” Some will simply flick through the photographs with the same logic behind the Tinder application – decisions to connect based only on the person's physical appearance. Others will glance over profiles and dismiss it out of hand, even if it does not contain content that would make contact otherwise unacceptable.

Profile screening often leads to a judgmental, “shopping” mentality. This is why some of the loveliest and genuinely sincere people are left on the shelves and gather dust. Certainly profiles are able to screen out obviously inappropriate or incompatible partners, but too often people make a decision based purely on pictures and the limited information provided. Studies have in fact led to the discovery that only once people have met in person, other characteristics become more important. One does not have a clue of how one will interact with another person until you actually meet, because interaction is a very complex process that no profile can reveal.

Perhaps it is time that some women on CS take a step back and re-evaluate their mindset – being so focused on chasing their Disney dream that they turn away so many great opportunities of meeting wonderful men. Chasing away potential partners just because they might not fit 100% into your self-created dream of perfection means that you are missing out on the experience of life.

So if you have reached that age when you are absolutely determined to find “The One,” and made it your life's mission to find “The One,” the reality is that trying to find someone that fits exactly into the jigsaw of your self-inflicted mindset is virtually impossible.
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