Once upon a time, many years ago, an old camel was wandering through the desert minding his own business. Suddenly, from behind a sand dune, a duck and a hen appeared.
"Hey duck, hen", called the camel. "You are a long way from home".
"Help us", cried the hen. "We got stranded here and we haven't had any water for days".
"Sorry”, said the camel, “but I have no water either".
"But you carry all that water on your back", said the duck. "Can we get some of that?"
"Oh my reserves", replied the camel. "Well yes you can, but there is...........er..........only one way I can give that to you. I have a pipe at the back, underneath. Go and suck on that hard and you should get some of the water".
Well duck and hen were too desperate to think too much about this so they quickly went underneath the camel to find the life saving pipe. After a lot of sucking they called up to the camel, who was just standing with his eyes closed and a smile on his face.
"We cant get any water!"
"Mmmmmm.....just keep sucking harder", replied camel.
Eventually the duck and hen were able to get some nourishment and happily they thanked the camel and flew away.
As for the camel, he continued wandering through the desert wondering who he could next supply to.
You are a defence lawyer. You are in court representing your client, Mr X, who is accused of aggravated burglary, rape and murder.
It is alleged that Mr X broke into a house during the night, where a mother and her daughter were sleeping, with an intention to steal. However both mother and daughter were assaulted and then murdered. Mr X was apprehended close to the scene and was high on a mix of drink and drugs and claimed to have no recollection of the previous few hours.
The main case against Mr X is strong forensic evidence which places him at the scene of the crime. However you are aware that because the police were so sure they had caught the killer, the formal procedures for the handling and processing of this evidence were not properly followed. If these irregularities were to come out in court, the evidence would be disqualified and the case against Mr X would almost certainly collapse.
Mr X has previous convictions for burglary, for which he has served time in prison. The file also shows he was once accused of rape, however this charge was dropped due to lack of evidence.
If Mr X is found guilty he faces the death penalty. If the case collapses he will walk from the court a free man.
So what are you going to do?
In the UK last week there was a case of a guy who had won something like 56 million on the lottery. (Good luck to him I hear you say but for those ladies on here seeking a "good provider", sorry I dont have his contact details).
Anyway his ex wife, who had left him 10 years previously for another guy, found out about his good fortune and took him to court, claiming some of it was rightfully hers. The court awarded her around 2 million.
Is this crazy or is it just me?
Most people approach a job interview thinking about what they need to do to get selected for the position. Researching the organisation on the internet, deciding which parts of their experience most closely match the new job and so on.
However, most people forget that an interview is not a selection process. It's a de-selection process, which is quite different.
Some obvious examples. Your CV is scruffy and poorly laid out. It goes in the bin and you get no interview. You are an hour late for the interview. Game over, you have already been deselected. You make it clear to the interviewer that you are only interested in what the pay rate is and the hours of work. Deselected.
So what has this got to do with a dating site? Quite a lot, because the principle is the same. It's a deselection process. Your first email makes it clear that the main attraction is the woman's body, (even if this is true). Probably deselected, unless the woman is a) old and flattered or b) desperate. You show no interest in the thoughts of the other person. Deselected.
A dating website is not a selection process.
Your two year old child and your husband / wife are both drowning. You can save one of them, but only one. The one you dont save will drown. Which one will you save and why ?
So lets kill the fatted calf, lets party in the street, eat drink and be merry. For our own Prince William has announced that he is to marry his long time girlfriend, the commoner Kate Middleton.
I should say at the outset that I am not a fan of our Royal Family and think they should have been abolished a long time ago.
I own a college in London and I was there yesterday, annoying the staff and students alike. When I had finished for the day I walked to a pub for a couple of drinks as I was waiting for a lady friend to pick me up. In the pub they had a large TV which was showing the interview on Sky news with Prince William and his fiance. There was no sound, only pictures. And half watching the interview as I concentrated on simultaneously drinking and playing brick breaker on my blackberry, one thing which struck me was the difference between the two of them. There was Kate who, whilst not a pretty girl, is attractive, confident and maintaining eye contact with the interviewer while William appeared to have inherited all the worst traits of both his parents. Smiling nervously, clearly insecure, unable to maintain eye contact with the interviewer......here was our future King. After years of being "groomed" for the position this was the best he could manage.
OK, does anyone really care either way? Probably not, but while we are quick to criticise countries who are not democratic according to our definition, here we have a family whose only claim to their positions is an accident of birth. And to those who say they have no real power, I say that makes it even worse! Why would we want a Head of State who has no power to achieve anything?
Watching the pictures on Sky of the rescue of the Chilean miners.
In a world full of bad news, what a great story. A mine in the middle of nowhere, 2 months trapped underground, a seemingly faultless operation to rescue them. And the amazingly strong Chilean relatives of the miners.
Chile...........I salute you !
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