Allowing the other person in your life..... (40)

Let's say you are in a beginning relationship. How long before you allow the other person really in your life..... And if you kinda keep your distance does that mean you are not that interested or is it out of fear of being hurt.
Just curious to see this from the male and female point of view....

No fear to been hurt but more so because of concern for my kids.

I take my time before letting the man coming into my home... kind of respect for me and my kids.

So let say that we are going out steady for more then 2 weeks and everything seem to go ok, then I will begin to talk with my kids about the fact that I have met someone... then only then... we will plan a futur first visit at home.

So it is more a one path at the time rather then fear or no interest. But all along the way , the partner will be fully aware of what I am doing and why I am doing it. So he won't have any impression that I am not interest.

I wasn't really thinking a few weeks more so a few months.....

well a few months...that a bit a lot... well for me

I would understand weeks but not months...I would give up the relations after a while.. but that is me.

My sister is getting a relation like that ...for more then 2 years like that.

Never met the parent..nor I never met him... well I live far away too but still.. they are hidding from everybody and my sister is not happy of that... lately he changed a bit and my sister's kids now see him.

Well I guess she has more patience then I am ...

Holy hannah, she got an awful lot of patience. No way I would be still around after 2 years like that....

either...I was so mad at one point that I beg her to never talk to me about him ever again ahahah

:)

For the first time in my life I need to have my own seperate life...I send him home every night. I don't know if he's the one and he's aware of it. As time goes by we're becoming more friends and well.... I think he' not the one cause I don't feel I ever will want to spend time with him ... for life...you know.

For me personaly. I would rather get to know someone really well first and then let the romance happen. I have been hurt one too many times and I also have children whom I worry about their feelings as well. So I want to make sure that when I am with someone that we are both 100% that we want the same things. So I believe that taking things one day at a time is always the best. I think that once you get to know one another and date and go through good and bad you have both seen a certain side to one another that will help factor in if your meant for one another or not.

I also don't believe in leading someone on if I am not sure of what I want. Its not fair for both people involved.

Again Good open communication is the best key to it all.