Is it POSSIBLE to have a RELATIONSHIP with someone fresh from a DIVORCE or previous LONG TERM RELAT ( Archived) (44)

I agree with Cute and 77vete. I don't think it is possible. I have been married for 21 years and almost a year separated. Have to wait a year before you can get a divorce. There is alot of grieving and healing to be done. I really believe you need that time to look over the relationship and see your part in it. I sure don't want to bring any baggage into a new relationship. I want to be able to forgive him first so I can move on. (easier said than done) but I am working on it daily. I finally decided enough was enough but there is still things that I need to let go of. On the other hand he is jumping into one relationship after another and it will never work until he looks at himself. I have not dated at all or even tried. I would like to find friends first and go from their. I have to admit, I am afraid of the whole dating thing. It has been a long long time. It's not the same as when I as 19.

I could not agree more Southern Yankee

My ex is the same way Southern.Jumps from relationship to relationship.He says he can't be alone.I've been alone 3 years and I think it has been good for me.you really do need that breather.By the way I think you are a very strong person to overcome the obstacles you have and help others.Keep spreading the good karma.

Anything is Possible. I am fresh from divorce and I think I would be a fool to jump right back into a serious relationship without figuring out what went wrong with the first one. Personally, I think I could have a long term relationship, Marriage that is a very different topic in itself. I'm not sure I want to be tortured like that again!! It would take a long period of time untill I would consider Marriage again. I want to make sure I have found a life long companion this time. Be Careful in any event.

Thanks for the kind words Cute. But I don't see myself as that strong. It has been a long struggle. I give God and other people who been where I have been the credit. Could never do it without help from others who have been down the same road. That is why I try my best not to be judgemental. I have met alot of good people that have been worse off and done some terrible things in the past but changed there lives completely for the better. These are the same people I use to judge in my younger years but have found they are the ones who I can trust more so than others. What a concept..LOL

as i stated once before,i dont think it possable.when i divorced it took 2 years for the fog to lift from around my head.I spent 15 years with this woman and that is not something you get over in 2 weeks.Of course there may be exceptions to the rule but i dont know of any.

you are right animallover.my divorce was not with fireworks and anger it was a clean mutual thing and like you i am still very good freinds with my x. it still took 2 years for me

In the end we are all human.we all have feelings.It does not matter weather we are male or female,pain comes to both.I think the biggest thing that bothered me about my breakup was that on person who was always there for 15 years was gone.Now that took some getting used to.At least we are still great freinds and get this i am to be best man at her wedding this summer,aint that a kicker,what a party that is going to be
will

Hi 7777
Well, I am glad to here how flexible you have been. I talk to my ex and i see her when I can and we dont argue. Point is all that anger even if its deep down is better discussed and now, I like You, can deal with it without pain for either of us.To move on you have to get to grips with all the hidden feelings or it will carry over to a new relationship. That is not a 2 week job its just a long time. Have a good time at the wedding.
Animallover