Arrogant Giving ( Archived) (34)

At the grocery Store's Customer Service Desk last night,
I was behind a lady inquiring about gift cards. She was
asking if the cards could have an option of omitting
alcohol and tobacco products. She wanted to help out
a friend, but didn't want to contribute to products that
she didn't believe in. (She even kinda LOOKED like
the "SNL Church Lady").

I had heard about this before during the holidays,
$5.oo gift certificates for food only. I admit that in a
way this made sense. You know the common refrain,
"They're just going to buy booze".

Then something struck me as so arrogant about
this. If you're going to give...GIVE. At least give
someone the dignity of making the choice even
if "in YOUR OPINION" those choices are not
dignified.

Is putting parameters (like this) on your generosity arrogant,
or just being concerned?

It's arrogant....If you have to give something with conditions attached then don't bother to give it at all....Either give freely or not at all....After all is that not the purpose of giving??????

We should not expect anything in return including how the person utilizes out gift!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm in agreement with you both. Get a no strings
attached gift card and then make up a food item and
take it over to her home. (Just a thought)

i guess its a little bit of both.. i mean you might care if they are going to buy whats needed instead of something not needed.. for thier sake but then again .. when you give something like that.. isnt the whole point so you wont have to worry bout what to buy or give to someone.. and for them to spend how they see fit..?

its kind of like a double sided coin i guess


if you want someone to have food.. give them food..simple as that..

if you want them to have clothes.. give them clothes.. if someone has trouble paying their bills.. do it for them..

assuming is you dont want to give them money because ur afraid they will spend it on something needless

I agree..... but then again, don't WE choose a shirt that we think would look good on someone or perhaps a gadget that WE think would be helpful to them?

Yes that's true but we don't tell them how and where they can wear the shirt either!!!!!!!!

Still "choosing" the shirt.

Yes something we think they will like and enjoy...and letting them have the free will to choose to wear it as they like....Not choosing something that we like based on our beliefs....Giving is about the other person NOT us!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't choose the shirt, give a gift voucher for it



Just a thought