honesty (59)
wedwardlinz, Upper Austria Austria680 Threads 7,252 Postshow many of the people on this site are actualy single and if not are honest enough to say if they are married or living with someone and if so why are the here?
Weddy you're funny! 
You reckon they are gonna come forward and own up to it just coz you asked them to? 
You reckon they are gonna come forward and own up to it just coz you asked them to? i just want to know why if they are with someone and happy would they come on a singles site ;there may be someone honest enugh to say why;
I am not in any kind of clear position myself though I have asked if I am an impostor. My answer has not brought clarity either. But I am glad you bring up this question. I am estranged, mostly live separate lives but still not divorced.
Why am I here is simply because trying to seek companionship I have come to meet. know and be happy with so many CS members. I couldnt tear myself away from them even after this relatively brief sojourn here. It is like those lost days of college when life seemed to be forever and gay.
Have I committed further subterfuges? Perhaps in evading a meeting; face to face I am an incompetent liar and a very unwilling one. Truthfulness cannot be achieved once ensnared in my actions. I have truly ensnared myself by my need for loving companionship.
Have I had a relationship with a woman while still being on CS? Yes, I have. But it was nothing I was sure of - nothing I could sustain myself with. I have depended heart and soul on friends here.
So Wedward, in a solid way mea-culpa; and yet in some ineffable way mea non-culpa. But that is for others to judge not me. I hope I have come through as honestly as one can. I have fears of commitment, fears of abandonment so late in life, I am engulfed with fears.
Thus I have acted as I have.
Homer
Why am I here is simply because trying to seek companionship I have come to meet. know and be happy with so many CS members. I couldnt tear myself away from them even after this relatively brief sojourn here. It is like those lost days of college when life seemed to be forever and gay.
Have I committed further subterfuges? Perhaps in evading a meeting; face to face I am an incompetent liar and a very unwilling one. Truthfulness cannot be achieved once ensnared in my actions. I have truly ensnared myself by my need for loving companionship.
Have I had a relationship with a woman while still being on CS? Yes, I have. But it was nothing I was sure of - nothing I could sustain myself with. I have depended heart and soul on friends here.
So Wedward, in a solid way mea-culpa; and yet in some ineffable way mea non-culpa. But that is for others to judge not me. I hope I have come through as honestly as one can. I have fears of commitment, fears of abandonment so late in life, I am engulfed with fears.
Thus I have acted as I have.
Homer
I think the EU parliament is just about to make it compulsory to have an affair or to be expelled from EU policy .
Is not adult to think that perhaps those who adhere to a single relationship are less common , hence less natural than the ones whom are involved in multi relationships ?
I once phoned a girl telling her that I was on my way while sat in my car outside her door . Less than 15 seconds a man was pushed out of the door .. pushing his shirt into his trousers .. She emphasised all the time that she was a one guy type of a girl .. She was very honest , one guy at a time ..
..
Ask why many stay or start a relationship when they know that their partner is married or involved .
I think here , girls are at it more than guys .
Is not adult to think that perhaps those who adhere to a single relationship are less common , hence less natural than the ones whom are involved in multi relationships ?
I once phoned a girl telling her that I was on my way while sat in my car outside her door . Less than 15 seconds a man was pushed out of the door .. pushing his shirt into his trousers .. She emphasised all the time that she was a one guy type of a girl .. She was very honest , one guy at a time ..
.. Ask why many stay or start a relationship when they know that their partner is married or involved .
I think here , girls are at it more than guys .
I was waiting for this question to come one day Snowflower. It has now arrived. I cannot but tell my story without ornamentation or self-justification.
Because all this is on cyberspace it didnt mean that my heart was heavy always. Burdened by prevarications and evations and subterfuges.
I have liked - indeed loved so many people here. I came here out of curiosity, thinking it would perhaps provide a thrill or two but I never guessed the huge emotional pull the members of this site exerted would exert on me.
I never have said an untruth in my expresssions of friedship and affection here; never either in the views I have expressed here; I so rejoiced in this sea of companionship that I thought I was genuinely a part of it.
If I have to go, so be it. But it will be in tears and fond remembrances.
ever,
Trinanjan (Homer)
Because all this is on cyberspace it didnt mean that my heart was heavy always. Burdened by prevarications and evations and subterfuges.
I have liked - indeed loved so many people here. I came here out of curiosity, thinking it would perhaps provide a thrill or two but I never guessed the huge emotional pull the members of this site exerted would exert on me.
I never have said an untruth in my expresssions of friedship and affection here; never either in the views I have expressed here; I so rejoiced in this sea of companionship that I thought I was genuinely a part of it.
If I have to go, so be it. But it will be in tears and fond remembrances.
ever,
Trinanjan (Homer)
Snowflower,
As Hamlet tells Octavio 'There is more in heaven and earth than can be dreamt of in your philosophy' .
Life I think is more complex than rigid concepts of truth, honesty, faithfulness etc though they are equally necessary. Those who are believers in god do grant him the manumission from the most spectacular betrayals like disease, famine, flood, poverty and so much more. I am most certainly not of that elevated status - merely a human being.
Wedwards quention did not make me hesitate a second to come out and say I had lied - but is lying the issue. Isnt our conventional morality the issue - with all its hypocrises.
I have loved your caring friendliness always and I will always remember it if I am banished forever from these rooms.
love
Trinanjan
As Hamlet tells Octavio 'There is more in heaven and earth than can be dreamt of in your philosophy' .
Life I think is more complex than rigid concepts of truth, honesty, faithfulness etc though they are equally necessary. Those who are believers in god do grant him the manumission from the most spectacular betrayals like disease, famine, flood, poverty and so much more. I am most certainly not of that elevated status - merely a human being.
Wedwards quention did not make me hesitate a second to come out and say I had lied - but is lying the issue. Isnt our conventional morality the issue - with all its hypocrises.
I have loved your caring friendliness always and I will always remember it if I am banished forever from these rooms.
love
Trinanjan
Is/was he your ex husband? 
Weddy! 
to you. Didn't think anyone would respond honestly. 
to you. Didn't think anyone would respond honestly. Expressed with condign irony. It's true Snowflower that there was a bit of satisfaction or schadenfreude in your telling of the story.
You are in my corner Snowflower but I did, very truly, see the slightly wrong angle you had in this. My apologies as usual for having a laugh at the most inopportune time.
If Snowflower, you understand Richard's point you'll see that it is not a 'deserving' fate even if that guy turned out to be a total idiotic loser.
Homer
Homer you don't have to explain/justify yourself to others, only to yourself. It's not about the judgement by others, only by yourself and how you deal with your feelings about it and forgive yourself before moving on, a better person may be.
It's not about conventional morality it's about doing something knowing that it will hurt one's loved one's feelings and destroy their trust by putting one's self gratification and self-indulgence first. That is if both people in the relationship have agreed that being loyal/faithful is important to them.
Once there trully is no intimacy and the relationship is trully over and BOTH people in the relationship are aware of this and have faced up to it, I don't see meeting someone else as unfaithfulness just because a piece of paper says you are still married.
This is only my opinion...
Thanks for your friendship Homer
It's not about conventional morality it's about doing something knowing that it will hurt one's loved one's feelings and destroy their trust by putting one's self gratification and self-indulgence first. That is if both people in the relationship have agreed that being loyal/faithful is important to them.
Once there trully is no intimacy and the relationship is trully over and BOTH people in the relationship are aware of this and have faced up to it, I don't see meeting someone else as unfaithfulness just because a piece of paper says you are still married.
This is only my opinion...
Thanks for your friendship Homer
Ok Homer you gonna have to spell it out for me coz I'm not sure I understand what it all means ...
you are so right but i livened this place up for awhile and made me laugh homers remarks are priceless 
Are you being mean to Homer Weddy?
All my respect to your contribution here and for enriching me.
Thanks for all the emotions you gave/give me.
I deeply hope you stay with us. You are one of my favorites in the intire CS.
Love
Cris
Thanks for all the emotions you gave/give me.
I deeply hope you stay with us. You are one of my favorites in the intire CS.
Love
Cris
I'm legally seperated and have been for 13 years, got my 28 year old son living with me but he's expected to move within the next two months
the toilet is free
No homer is a very honest and sensitive person and write from his heart i respect him very much and have no wish for homer to feel hurt
Snowflower,
I know I dont have to explain and justify all this to others, only to myself. I went first to a strict methodist school followed by firming up in a dunjeon of a Jesuit school. All this while my parents were crypto communists and atheists to the core.
The net result has been for so so many years a complete split in my thinking. I have done what all men have done and perhaps more - mortals I should say instead of men. I have suppressed my feelings of jealousy, of envy, of anger, of hatred and at the end of it understood nothing and felt totally alienated and misunderstood. My ethic was too strong a brew. My stomach couldnt suffer it any more.
At the age of 26 I met an Italian lad from the south where any sign of intelligence and they were taken by the church. Enzo was his name - not much attention devoted even at birth, never anything fanciful, not even a name that spoke of his parent's ambitions. He joined the orders at age 7; became a theologian; taught philosophy at Rome and THEN discovered girls after 30 years of strict catholic indoctrination.
I was doing my MBA in Brussels and he was studying photography; he worked as a hotel porter at night and I was a waiter across the street. We met through his girlfriend Bernadette who was a connection. Enzo had applied for for post at the EU as translator, waited many years, got the plum job and threw it away for photography. He knew that his chances at being successful as a photograher were very low - it wasnt talent of which he had plenty, but the fierce competition and infighting.
We met through Bernadette and became fast friends. We talked about everything. His depth of knowledge was profound. He was not a flash intellectual - he was world class and so very humble and inobstrusive. I sat at his knees - metaphorically - and talk and asked questions about everything from casuistry to physics and love. At the same time I betrayed him. I had an affair with Bernadette, so beautiful she was, so loving and so ever felt roped in by Enzo's purity.
My first betrayal. Horrific, when I think of it.
Enzo and I came to Lux at about the same time - me with a banking job, he with a commmission job. In four months he was gone
I have to leave now.
More later
Trinanjan/Homer
I know I dont have to explain and justify all this to others, only to myself. I went first to a strict methodist school followed by firming up in a dunjeon of a Jesuit school. All this while my parents were crypto communists and atheists to the core.
The net result has been for so so many years a complete split in my thinking. I have done what all men have done and perhaps more - mortals I should say instead of men. I have suppressed my feelings of jealousy, of envy, of anger, of hatred and at the end of it understood nothing and felt totally alienated and misunderstood. My ethic was too strong a brew. My stomach couldnt suffer it any more.
At the age of 26 I met an Italian lad from the south where any sign of intelligence and they were taken by the church. Enzo was his name - not much attention devoted even at birth, never anything fanciful, not even a name that spoke of his parent's ambitions. He joined the orders at age 7; became a theologian; taught philosophy at Rome and THEN discovered girls after 30 years of strict catholic indoctrination.
I was doing my MBA in Brussels and he was studying photography; he worked as a hotel porter at night and I was a waiter across the street. We met through his girlfriend Bernadette who was a connection. Enzo had applied for for post at the EU as translator, waited many years, got the plum job and threw it away for photography. He knew that his chances at being successful as a photograher were very low - it wasnt talent of which he had plenty, but the fierce competition and infighting.
We met through Bernadette and became fast friends. We talked about everything. His depth of knowledge was profound. He was not a flash intellectual - he was world class and so very humble and inobstrusive. I sat at his knees - metaphorically - and talk and asked questions about everything from casuistry to physics and love. At the same time I betrayed him. I had an affair with Bernadette, so beautiful she was, so loving and so ever felt roped in by Enzo's purity.
My first betrayal. Horrific, when I think of it.
Enzo and I came to Lux at about the same time - me with a banking job, he with a commmission job. In four months he was gone
I have to leave now.
More later
Trinanjan/Homer
single over here. I think married and established couples visit these sites through boredom.
Those of you who are with prospective partners and on this site just remember: what goes around, comes around.
Those of you who are with prospective partners and on this site just remember: what goes around, comes around.
More Threads
The GOP Representatives owned by Vladimir Putin
Unions support Democrats!
your favorite topic?
wanting beyond need
Would you hire this guy - for any job?
Ladies
The weird and the random facts around the world
Democrats destroyed America
More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
s*xual skills
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
Stats for this Thread
2,528 Views
58 Comments
in EU Forums
Created: Jul 2007
Last Viewed: 6 hrs ago
Last Commented: Sep 2007
0 Likes