EXCERPTS FROM A CAT' S DAILY DIARY ( Archived) (7)

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT' S DAILY DIARY
Day 183 of My Captivity

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I

am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild

satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost

succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors,

I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse

and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to

strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm,

not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary

throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that

my confinement was due to MY power of " allergies. " Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.

The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

Saw this in the neighbourhood paper and thought it was funny.

Guess I was the only one who liked it.

Good one Kitty
I love cats because you can't tell them
what to do.
Had three red cats one time and people
would ask me why are they all red?
Told them they went better with the colour
of the carpet.

I have always been a cat lover.

This is just soooooooooo funny, I can see the little things just concocting how to kill us, captors. I have recently become a cat "keeper" can't say I own the blessed creature...she owns us.

She can not see me with my hair up in a ponytail...she jumps and grabs me by the hair...

My oldest daughter is totally freaked by the cat... but if Cookie leaves her alone, she is ok... otherwise... and Cookie knows that Amanda despises her...and she keeps on trying to stablish contact... jumps on my daughter's bed while she's asleep... so funny... but I'm afraid one of these days we'll have to get Cookie from a lamppost after Amanda swiftly kicks the bejesus out of her...