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Alone

You smile and laugh
And all seems well,
Until you wave goodbye,
Shut the door,
And drop the charade.
Your smile dies,
Laughter ceases,
And straight upstairs you sleepwalk,
Your eyes foggy and detattched.
Unconsciously pacing,
Thinking of it all;
Everything you want to let out
But can't.
Things you disagree with
But can't be against it out loud.
The things you feel
But can't be known to others.
They all bounce and collide with each other in your head,
Fighting to be thought about.
Dying to have their conflict resolved,
Or at least talked about.
But you don't,
You can't.
These things are secret.
The pain of them must be hidden,
The screams muffled.
The tears held in.
The feelings bottled up.
All of it is necessary
For people not to question you.
Though secretly,
Deep down at the darkest
Most forgotten parts of your soul,
You might secretly want to let it all out.
To have someone listen,
To have someone care,
To have someone make it better,
Make all your hidden pain go away.
Make all your cuts heal...
But you are the way you are,
People look at you differently
And choose to walk away…
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2012

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Comments (6)

Jared86
This reminded me of how I felt when I was seventeen...I'm like the happiest person ever (to everyone who knows me)...but that year, as soon as I was alone, I'd break. I didn't know if I'd ever be able to get through that pain. It was the worst I felt ever till this day. (I'm 26 now). But you'll have to realize...Not everyone will look away...You'll find someone who you could confide in...It took till i was 23 to find that person. and I'm still standing here. This was a great read. Thank you very much for this.
windyweatherly
lordskywalker first welcome to PC. Second, this is so profound and I myself relate to this now and again. But when the pain heals, a new beginning ensues and I know just be strong and it will heal in time.

thanks for sharing.

windy
hawqeye
I know from experience some people can't help the way they are.A good analogy is a teen grappling with being gay.He doesn't want to be but he can't help it but feels he will hurt his loved ones and friends.What he doesn't know is that most will accept him,although with some it may take longer.Sure,it will be a let down but only temporarily.
Whatever your problem is,you may think right now is so very serious,well,you're wrong.Being honest with your loved ones (and yourself) is your duty.Sooner or later it will come out and is best coming from you.Then it can be dealt with and you will feel great relief.Your true friends will still be there and some may take some time.Live your life for you...not someone else.I hope this makes sense and helps.God bless
Bill
hawqeye
Sky,I just want to add that I dealt with depression most of my life(didn't know what it was as a teen)and it wqs really bad in my mid teens.I came close to suicide several times.I slowly started to realize that I was taking everything too seriously.my advice,laugh at yourself and your situation.If you can laugh at yourself generously,you are on the right track.Humour is a good weapon.God bless
Ahyra
Poignant write thumbs up
orientalkoru
I know the feeling, I can so relate to this.
We are the masters of our own thoughts Sky...
what other's think, feel, say about us is
immaterial. Powerful write once again...thumbs up
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by lord_skywalker (4 Poems)
on Jul 2012
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Last Viewed: Jul 26
Last Commented: Jul 2012

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