Have you ever dated someone with special needs? ( Archived) (18)

It's too hard to find someone here who would be willing to date someone with a disability, thats why my love life sucks

the only disability in life is a bad attitude and the only people in life who find what they are looking for is the fault finders...gd nite every one an ty for the chat im off to clock up som zzzzzzzs ..

Men too Pat!

"Special needs" is different and should be taken seriously. Not everybody can handle such a challenge.

ALL women have SPECIAL 'needs'......... it is my duty to satisfy them!

ok....seriously - my last wife was classed as 'disabled'. She had a serious back injury and later a hole in the heart was discovered and she had to have open heart surgery (i.e. surgery INSIDE her heart not some 'routine' bypass).

The fact that she was disabled and could not do simple things like shopping for more than a few minutes without being in severe pain meant that there was the possibility I'd end up pushing her around in a wheelchair eventually; if you love somebody this should not pose a huge problem.

I had a 3 months relationship with a guy I was desperately in love with when I was 18. -Unfortunately he was always the 'independent' type and ended it.. just when I was really getting into it..

After that I just heard of him here and there, and lived very far away for 20 years..- During that time he got thrown out a second storey window in a bar brawl- and his brain took a serious blow.
Even though he has never touched a drop of alcohol in his life, the guys in hospital didnt quite realise what had happened and mistakenly left him to 'sober up' for hours, before discovering his serious injury..
The result was a prolonged coma and as he came to several years of rehab etc..

I met up with him again in 2003, and I was devastated to see he had lost his speech down to 4 words, he is lame down one side, dragging his foot, and his right hand is permanently curled into a ball. He has trouble reading text, and also can get confused with audio.. He has epilepsy and other body issues like cramps or circulation problems.
You can imagine my sadness.
But by the time I met him, he lad long since accepted his disability, the fact that people think he is an imbecile first off,- and all his other issues.
He had started a watch repair business, now just trades them, he was working at a cafe and other places,- and even took part in a dance performance that attempted to illustrate what life is like with a brain injury.
He lives alone in a vibrant neighborhood community and is socially very active, seems to be the person who calls me to go dancing the most out of all my friends.

He achieved all this by himself, as the friends he had before the accident where overwhelmed by the change, and seem to have disappeared. His father had long since died, as far as I recall he was a violent alcoholic.
His mother couldnt have been much use to him neither, as she was just doing time in prison for posession of marijuana.

I was going through a traumatic break up at the time and needed a place to stay, and he let me and my the 3 year old stay with him.. Cared for me, let me whine and feel sorry for me, advised me about my problems and told me off if I was to back off and give in on anything...

Next to him I felt the disabled one, for feeling an emotional mess about my break-up,- my legal issues, my restart in a country that had become foreign to me..

I fell in love with him all over again and we had a brief affair, until he disclosed to me that he was living a poly lifestyle and I did not want this.. So we remained great friends..

The moral of the story is: A disabled person may be 'disabled', but it also gives them the opportunity to show what they are made of internally, the stuff that really matters.
A disabled person can humble and impress just as much or more than any able bodied person..
Just like with non-disabled people: it only depends on their character..

(In case you are wondering how we communicate, he can say yes and no, he gestures and uses intonation very well, and on the phone we send MMS images to point any conversation to a new topic or focus.. I guess we just know each other very well..)

yeah women

her special needs !! easy...money. She needed money and managed to spend all of mine. But stupid me let her