rohaan Forum Posts (10,561)

RE: The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing about

Ca va. I am really going to go out on a limb here, but it is something I've covered before so please forgive if it sounds old and worn. Thanx! To answer your question in a nutshell: Monogamy is not a natural state for males. The societal forcing of it with pressure, either blatant or tacit, in itself causes resentment. Now, a one-person only relationship would be what I want. Honest. But isn't it clear that a one and only same partner for life doesn't (usually) work? After all, look at the separation and divorce rate, not to mention how many are still in relationships and are unhappy. But...what's the answer? For each partner to accept a boyfriend or girlfriend for the other? What would be reasonable? (hint; the way it is going doesn't seem to be working, does it?)

RE: Your favourite Beatles song.

hi jacking this thread to ask you a question. Were you and a friend camping/surfing on the Oregon Coast 10 or 12 years ago? One of you (if it was you) played a didjeredoo for me. Just wondering--pic looks familiar.

RE: Your favourite Beatles song.

"Ticket To Ride"--just love it.

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

BUTCH FIGHT!! Ride 'Em, Cowboy!! Rock em an sock em what mordant fun, this thread!

RE: Have u ever reported someone/something on this site?

Did you give yourself swats, lashes, too?

RE: Have u ever reported someone/something on this site?

I have a long fuse--am very very patient. I am willing to gather info, see all sides, and even change my point of view. So where do I draw the line, so to speak? Out and out cruel comments. That's the deal. Again, it's great to have differences of opinion, etc...There is a right way and a wrong way. One can always be courteous. (I am not telling whether I turned anybody in or not! Isn't that supposed to be confidential?) ro

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

I just love your optimism! Aim high, lovie--

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

Fortune and money are two entirely different things. We are experiencing an incredible economic restructuring here. A family I know went from making well over 100,000 thousand a year to about 17,000. When the husband got a job, finally, he was absolutely ecstatic. They have completely re-evaluated every aspect of life, and it is evident that they have never been happier. A successful life has NOTHING to do with money. It comes from values and creativeness within.

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

Right On. I'm still enough of a beatnik to believe that valuing money over friendship/love is uncool.

RE: Is it wrong to want a guy who is financially secure?

I don't know what you feel exactly is a loser, but I do think it is perfectly OK to want and search for someone who is financially and emotionally secure. Given that, suppose there's a guy who works hard 40 hours a week to make minimum wage. He lives in a small studio apartment, clips coupons and rarely eats out or goes out much. He doesn't drive because of the cost, and besides, he really doesn't need to. He has no credit cards, and no real savings. He has a nice small circle of friends, and is fairly content. Many people think of him as a loser because he makes low wages, doesn't own a car or a house, and has little money set aside. Is he?

RE: Watch out

To Ardie: cute and to the point. How are you grandpa? How is the baby? Here's a hug to tide you over--going to the pub in a minute to see if I can win hearts. Ha ha (only have pepsi--the juice of the barley days are gone.

RE: Watch out

All squirrels look alike. (Except to other squirrels). Hint, Ali--be careful of these kinds of posts. Some could take offense. Just letting you know...

RE: Do you like a guy with :

I so hear you. I told you I like jack hammer operators, cowboys and lumberjacks. I told you. (OOO LA LA!)

RE: Do you like a guy with :

Professional athletes, sometimes amateur athletes, especially swimmers, shave all body hair off, or very, very short on the head and maybe do a "bikini" line. This cuts down on the resistance moving in the water, I guess.

RE: Do you like a guy with :

Years ago I watched a television show called "Gentle Ben" with Dennis Weaver playing the Dad. In the show, he was a sherrif or wildlife patrol officer or something, and he would be scooting across the Everglades on something like your rig. Is that what it does? I forgot what they call them. thax.

RE: Do you like a guy with :

You got long chest hair?

RE: If cooking is an Art...

Six years of Home Ec!! The most offered in my high school days was three or four terms, then maybe an advanced class. It was always an elective. Now, because of budget cuts, some schools have dropped it altogether. (I took a course called "Bachelors Survival" in HS--the guy equivalent. It was great, I learned tons of household stuff that still comes in handy. Gotta run--see ya!)

RE: U.S. Religious Knowledge Survey

I find this interesting, too. I am not LDS (Mormons prefer this, for some reason, over "Mormon") but have great friends who are. Did you know that they have, outside of Cambridge, UK, the most extensive research and collection of genealogy known? Fascinating. Even non-LDS travel to Salt Lake City to do research, and the results are seemingly top notch. How are you SF? Here's hugs, you still the nice chap?

RE: If cooking is an Art...

If you can find a cookbook from Friars in a monastery or Sisters in a convent, get it. These people rock when it comes to cooking. There's a restaurant here in Oregon that still does the cooking on a real brick oven and over chips/coal burning, too. It is the best food I ever had. I went to a cowboy ranch supper outside once, too, and everything was cooked over a triangle fire, even the side of beef was roasting. It was radical, Lad.

RE: If cooking is an Art...

I am learning to clean as I go, Ardie. You know, I make a cup of coffee and a two egg omelet and dirty everything in the house.

RE: Why don´t some people reply???

In that respect i would have to sometimes agree. Now, today I am in a mood (not me!) because I answered a thread, it seemed like it was going along at a good clip, etc... and all of a sudden, poof, no more answers, no more responses, etc... Now, that is irritating because the OP's say they want to wrangle with something, have a talk, bla bla, and then it comes to a halt. It leaves many of us thinking, "why should we bother? WTF? anyone else know what I mean? It's rude, actually, to post, and then skip town. Kinda inconsiderate.jmo

RE: If cooking is an Art...

I am hi jacking for question. I am a Scot, but the idea of Haggis just turns me off. If I were blindfolded and didn't know it was Haggis, probably I wold like it. I do like Calimari, however, and most people I meet say they wouldn't eat it. Here at the beach, too! (do you know what calimari is, ardie?)

RE: If cooking is an Art...

I liked your post. Have always considered myself a top shelf cook, but for the life of me cannot make Beef Wellington (Pie pastry wrapped London Broil roast) the coat falls off in the oven or the beef isn't tender, etc... Any ideas? I even followed Julia Child's and Martha Stewerts recipes to the letter. Now, other things I can make like ringin' a bell. You sound like a cool cat. (chat froid ?) hardy har har

RE: Question for the men @ ladies...

How come you so smart?

RE: Real Meaning behind this or what do you see

I had to return to this thread because I am interested in knowing exactly why some of the other members feel the way they do. Of course I respect, and would hope for the same, in responses. Note that I returned to the first page, and included the original post, to save time in constant referral to it.

What was it that was so wrong about his leaving? Women leave men all the time, and do not give truthful or clear reasons, yet both men and women sympathize with them, instead of the man who got left. I don't get your reasonings. Perhaps his first explanation of "not knowing what he wanted" was weak, but at the time it was likely an honest statement. He DID answer truthfully when she asked further--and for all the world it appears to be anything but mean or hostile. He complimented her, but at the same time was letting her know he believed it was unfair to be in pretense. That's legitimate, folks. And completely honest. Should he have stayed in a relationship not loving the lady? Would that be a satisfactory life for either? I am feeling like he has been judged unfairly for simply finding himself in a problematic area that Life gives many of us at some time or another. I don't want to sound bitter, or argumentative, but I can't understand how some of you feel the way you do.

RE: Question for the men @ ladies...

Nice catch! If you can get a woody I'd like to hear from you. (uh, wait a minute, I guess there is this little.... )

RE: Real Meaning behind this or what do you see

Hi Honey--I don't quite get your meaning. Am I being too easy on the guy and not understanding enough to the young lady? Really, I do understand, if you read her preamble she herself says that he told her (in what sounded like a kind way) honestly. Darlin', there's just no way to not hurt someone's feelings in some situations. For instance, you would agree,,I hope, that it is legitimate to tell someone who is too nosy, for instance, that you wish to be confidential. No matter how you slice it, it's still a version of "none of your business", and people always get their backs up when you don't tell them what they want to hear. By the same token, there is no "good" way for a man, or a woman, to tell either , well, what was that movie? "Just Not Into You" or something. Life isn't always custom designed for our ideal. I feel for her, but I still don't think the guy was in the wrong. Wasn't working out for him, whatever. He knew it was time to split. He was kind about it.

That's more than most.

RE: Real Meaning behind this or what do you see

Oh stop. People always give the guy who has to break up with a lady the gay rap. Hmmm!

RE: Real Meaning behind this or what do you see

Tough, really really tough. But he gets a triple "A" in my book for being honest, and very kind at the same time. Think of it this way--you wouldn't really want someone to pretend to like/love you if their heart wasn't into it, would you? Come on. He was tactful, courteous, and forthright. I fail to see why you need this translated. It's polite, succinct, and non-confrontational. What more or else could he do? Lie to you? Or just disappear and leave you hanging? You know, sometimes it just doesn't work out. We can't "make love happen" any more than we can dictate the weather. I'll parse it for you (an old school term) in case you still are puzzled.

"It's because you're a great girl" (most likely a genuine statement, not meant to lead you on. Accept it as such).

"I just couldn't get my heart into it...I tried but I just couldn't love you" (Extreme raw honesty. It took some work for him to be able to say this. It isn't easy. He tried to love you but the chemistry just isn't there. It's a no fault situation).

"I didn't wanna drag things out". (No mystery here. Again, he is being kind yet completely honest. You wouldn't really want him to drag things out, anyway, would you?)

You must not blame him for a love that just isn't there. He was much more of a gentleman than many are. Move on. Yes, I know when you love someone it is difficult when it isn't mutual. Good luck. Heads up, dear: it's the way the world turns. Learn to be accepting and peaceful.