This topic has been discussed before, and I see how frustrating it can be for the single moms. Since this is a forum, I will speak out for the men who may be reluctant to get involved. We are not living in the same gentle era we once were. Step-parenting is extremely daunting. If the kids are older, and possibly upset about the separation/divorce, they can make a family blending impossible, and a relationship in itself is a big enough deal without factoring in this element as well. Also, if the ex is still involved, then we have the added stress of anger and jealousies, kids being kids are confused about their loyalties. What about the need for discipline, too? In this day and age you don't dare do it, even to your own children, let alone someone else's. There are a number of reasons that are quite valid why a man would not want to take on a woman who has children from another relationship. It is not a simple matter at all.
For the most part, I am really a traditionalist when it comes to this sort of thing. BUT..today I was totally elated by a small incident. Waiting to cross a very busy intersection, (and I have a noticeable handicap) two ladies in pickups right in a row stopped and both gave me the warmest sweetest smiles and out and out stares (but "nice" stares!). When I crossed another gentleman remarked, "Say, did you see those two gals all over you, guy"? "Oh, come on", I said, "that wasn't nothin.." he broke in, "No, seriously, man, I'm as straight as an arrow but you are one good lookin' man, you carry yourself well and look like you know where you're going. I think they really saw something they liked!" I have been in seventh heaven all day. I guess it's all right for the ladies to ask for a date, why not, in this day and age. Gosh, I've had a wonderful day!
I wish I could have mixed the choices-"-camping in the country by a sunney beach" (for years that was the only vacation I took, but it was more than enough. Wonderful memories. Next choice would be a week in Reno and the surrounding woods, trails, etc... Neat area, too.
Of all the posts I've seen recently, this one really caught my attention. Wanting security, in itself, isn't "wrong" per se, but that margin of security is so vast. (Some people would be quite content and secure in a simple cabin in the country, some would need a 10 Million Park Avenue penthouse -- see what I mean?) That said, it is notable that women , many, many women fought and continue to fight, for equal rights, in every aspect of life. This means earning your own way, into the bargain. So, in that respect it wouldn't be right to expect financial security, because (the women who say this) you want equal rights. Which is it? You don't get to have it both ways. I'm not down on women, I'm just saying if you want equal rights, then it isn't appropriate to expect a man to take care of your financial concerns, too. One or the other.
Ca va. I am really going to go out on a limb here, but it is something I've covered before so please forgive if it sounds old and worn. Thanx! To answer your question in a nutshell: Monogamy is not a natural state for males. The societal forcing of it with pressure, either blatant or tacit, in itself causes resentment. Now, a one-person only relationship would be what I want. Honest. But isn't it clear that a one and only same partner for life doesn't (usually) work? After all, look at the separation and divorce rate, not to mention how many are still in relationships and are unhappy. But...what's the answer? For each partner to accept a boyfriend or girlfriend for the other? What would be reasonable? (hint; the way it is going doesn't seem to be working, does it?)
hi jacking this thread to ask you a question. Were you and a friend camping/surfing on the Oregon Coast 10 or 12 years ago? One of you (if it was you) played a didjeredoo for me. Just wondering--pic looks familiar.
I have a long fuse--am very very patient. I am willing to gather info, see all sides, and even change my point of view. So where do I draw the line, so to speak? Out and out cruel comments. That's the deal. Again, it's great to have differences of opinion, etc...There is a right way and a wrong way. One can always be courteous. (I am not telling whether I turned anybody in or not! Isn't that supposed to be confidential?) ro
Fortune and money are two entirely different things. We are experiencing an incredible economic restructuring here. A family I know went from making well over 100,000 thousand a year to about 17,000. When the husband got a job, finally, he was absolutely ecstatic. They have completely re-evaluated every aspect of life, and it is evident that they have never been happier. A successful life has NOTHING to do with money. It comes from values and creativeness within.
I don't know what you feel exactly is a loser, but I do think it is perfectly OK to want and search for someone who is financially and emotionally secure. Given that, suppose there's a guy who works hard 40 hours a week to make minimum wage. He lives in a small studio apartment, clips coupons and rarely eats out or goes out much. He doesn't drive because of the cost, and besides, he really doesn't need to. He has no credit cards, and no real savings. He has a nice small circle of friends, and is fairly content. Many people think of him as a loser because he makes low wages, doesn't own a car or a house, and has little money set aside. Is he?
To Ardie: cute and to the point. How are you grandpa? How is the baby? Here's a hug to tide you over--going to the pub in a minute to see if I can win hearts. Ha ha (only have pepsi--the juice of the barley days are gone.
All squirrels look alike. (Except to other squirrels). Hint, Ali--be careful of these kinds of posts. Some could take offense. Just letting you know...
Professional athletes, sometimes amateur athletes, especially swimmers, shave all body hair off, or very, very short on the head and maybe do a "bikini" line. This cuts down on the resistance moving in the water, I guess.
Years ago I watched a television show called "Gentle Ben" with Dennis Weaver playing the Dad. In the show, he was a sherrif or wildlife patrol officer or something, and he would be scooting across the Everglades on something like your rig. Is that what it does? I forgot what they call them. thax.
Six years of Home Ec!! The most offered in my high school days was three or four terms, then maybe an advanced class. It was always an elective. Now, because of budget cuts, some schools have dropped it altogether. (I took a course called "Bachelors Survival" in HS--the guy equivalent. It was great, I learned tons of household stuff that still comes in handy. Gotta run--see ya!)
I find this interesting, too. I am not LDS (Mormons prefer this, for some reason, over "Mormon") but have great friends who are. Did you know that they have, outside of Cambridge, UK, the most extensive research and collection of genealogy known? Fascinating. Even non-LDS travel to Salt Lake City to do research, and the results are seemingly top notch. How are you SF? Here's hugs, you still the nice chap?
If you can find a cookbook from Friars in a monastery or Sisters in a convent, get it. These people rock when it comes to cooking. There's a restaurant here in Oregon that still does the cooking on a real brick oven and over chips/coal burning, too. It is the best food I ever had. I went to a cowboy ranch supper outside once, too, and everything was cooked over a triangle fire, even the side of beef was roasting. It was radical, Lad.
In that respect i would have to sometimes agree. Now, today I am in a mood (not me!) because I answered a thread, it seemed like it was going along at a good clip, etc... and all of a sudden, poof, no more answers, no more responses, etc... Now, that is irritating because the OP's say they want to wrangle with something, have a talk, bla bla, and then it comes to a halt. It leaves many of us thinking, "why should we bother? WTF? anyone else know what I mean? It's rude, actually, to post, and then skip town. Kinda inconsiderate.jmo
online today!rohaan Forum Posts (10,539)
Rock em an sock em what mordant fun, this thread!
RE: A guys opinion on single mothers?
Oh come on. Any stern comment is treated over-the top. You know what I meant. You can't discipline in any form any more, it seems.