I am in one of those happy moods tonite, so i thought i would share with everyone.
Little Johnny watched his Daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods. Curious, Johnny followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could not contain himself, he ran home and started to tell his mother.
"Mommy I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane . . . ."
At this point Mommy cut him off and said, "Johnny this is such an interesting story suppose you save the rest of it for supper time.I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight".
At the dinner table Mommy asked little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny started his story, "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mommy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army".
Moral: Sometimes you need to listen to the whole story before you interrupt
An old man was sitting at the bar, when a young man came in with a mowhawk haircut dyed different colors. He sat down next to the old man and noticed that the old man was staring at him. Finally the young man asks the man "What the hell are you staring at! Didn't you ever do anything crazy when you were a kid?" The old man pondered for a moment and replied "Yeah, I screwed a peacock and I was wondering if you were my son."
The preacher got up in church one Sunday morning and told the congregation, "Brothers and sisters, we are going to have to do something about teenagers parking behind the church at night. I was out there this morning and there are enough beer cans out there to build a car."
One of the old sisters stood up and said, "Amen brother, and enough rubbers to put tires on it!!!"
sqeekers Forum Posts (601)
oops, where did that come from. 
RE: I feeling like whining but i think i shouldnt...
Wait, let me get some cheese to go with that whine.