My inquiry it more about why I have met so many wonderful people on this site, yet they remain singe. Captain is a testament to the fact that there are exceptional folks on this site. Just wondering if we sometimes give up to fast because of our past experiences.
I read Captain's thread, and he has what many of us are seeking.
Have we become so defensive because of past experiences, both in real life and on this site, that we are not giving the opportunity for love to find us?
My experience was that the relationship ended, we both hung in there for our child, but it finally ended. As far as I know, (I was the one to make the call [end it]) we never cheated on one another, but it wouldn't have mattered at that point.
So where does meeting someone, feeling some love for them, but knowing your are not soul mates fit in? Do we really have to begin by preconceiving the end. Or, could it be okay to fall in love with someone, realize that it is not sustainable, and keep loving them, despite the fact that they did not fit the mould?
The divorce rate is at least fifty percent. Of the fifty percent remaining, how many do you know that are, at the very least, somewhat satisfied and content? There seems to be this Fairy Tale that you will meet the "right one" and be happy forever and ever.
I have spoken with some younger men and women in my life, and they see relationships as shorter term, unless they hit the lottery and find someone that they really could spend the rest of their lives with.
It is not a desparaging thing, just reality. There are couples that find their way, for the rest of their lives and are happy, but they seem to be the exception, rather than the norm. The whole "Fairy Tale" thing seems to be linked to the first six months of a relationship, and falling in love.
I do believe that soul-mates do find each other, but I think it is a rare occurence. On the bright side of things, I think we give up fantastic "moments" with another (weeks, months, years)and don't respect them for what they are, important times in our lives.
I have a loving relationship with the mother of my daughter, even though we have been separated for almost four years. We are friends who love each other, but we are not meant to be together. Once we both accepted that, we went back to where we started, as loving friends.
I am about to put up a post about this, because younger folks seem to get this more than us more mature folks.
I could hunker down a bit if that would help, lol. Really, I am barely 5'8'. You have been very nice on all these posts. There it is again, good people, without a nice partner!
Thanks for the responses. I now see that people are on here for different reasons, and that many people find value in the thoughts of others.
This site is odd for me, because it is the first one I have been on one where I am not looking for a date, but just wanting to hear the thoughts and opinions of others.
Relatively speaking, this kind of relating is new. Thanks to Dru, I have managaged to understand this site, and I do appreciate it. To any of you that I have offended, my opologies, as I had a defensive stance (due to other sites) when I came on to this one.
I was listening to the news yesterday, and heard about a fourteen year old boy who was shot three times (and killed) in broad daylight, in Toronto (two hours away from my home). Lots of us on this site have kids, and for some reason, this one really struck home.
The connection between the two aforementioned paragraphs is that none of this stuff was going on when we were kids.
I have slowly come to understand that most folks on this site are decent. Yet here we all are, without a partner. Seems kind of odd that there are so many good people, but none of them are in the near vicinity.
Two elderly ladies are walking their dogs in New York, in the winter, and get cold. The one says to the other, Lets go into that bar and have a hot toddy. The other says, but we have our dogs, what will will do with them.
The first lady says, Just put on your sunglasses and tell them it is your seeing eye dog.
So the first lady attempts to go into the bar and is stopped and told, You can't bring your dog in here. She says she is blind and it is her seeing eye dog. The doorman says since when did they start to use Doberman's as seeing eye dogs. Without flinching, the first lady says, A couple of years ago and they are better than Labs.
The second lady attempts entrance and is stopped by the doorman. She says it is her seeing eye dog as well.
The doorman says, since when did they start to use Chihuahuas as seeing eye dogs, to which she replies.....
SeriouslyFun Forum Posts (247)
Have we become too defensive, too fast?
Too Fast.Well, do we give other folks a try, have a few emails and then make a decision?
Or do we take a bit of a chance?
However, I do agree about trusting your gut.