Once upon a time, there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met a man and fell in love.
When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on." So she made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home.
On her way, she passed a small diner and the odour of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home. So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it.
Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table.
She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone.
The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill.
She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked cabbage.
Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the telephone farewells signalled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!!
There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy Birthday"!!!
I'll glide your licquorice rope through my Polo, but hurry back from the Yorkie Bar 'cause I've promised to take the Jellie Babies for a Picnic later.....
Mr Cadbury and Miss Rowntree met on a Double Decker, it was After Eight.
She was from Quality Street; he was a Fisherman's Friend.
On the way they stopped at a Yorkie Bar, he had a Rum and Butter, she had a Wine Gum.
He asked her name, 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said.
'I'm the one with the nuts,' he thought! Then he touched her Milky Way.
They checked in to a hotel, and went straight to the bedroom. Mr Cadbury turned out the light for a bit of Black Magic.
It wasn't long before he slipped his hand into her Snickers and felt her Cream Egg.
He fondled her Flap Jacks then he showed her his Curly Wurly and Miss Rowntree shaked her Tic Tacs for him.
Miss Rowntree wasn't keen to have any Jelly Babies, so she let him take a trip down Bourneville Boulevard via her Party Ring.
He was pleased as he always fancied a bit of Fudge. It was a magic moment as she let out a scream of Turkish Delight.
When he pulled out, his fun size Mars Bar felt a bit Crunchie.
She wanted more, but he needed a Time Out, however, he noticed her Pink Wafers looked very appetizing. He did a Twirl, had a Picnic in her Sherbet Dip and finished off by giving her a Gob Stopper!
Unfortunately, Mr Cadbury then had to go home to his wife, Caramel.
Sadly, 3 days later his Magnum lolly started to drip. It turned out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Basset who had Allsorts!!!
Friday, March 26 05:00 pm A 96-year-old temple keeper has become Taiwan's oldest groom on record after marrying a woman less than one third his age, a report said Friday Lin Chung, who runs a Taoist temple in south Taiwan's Tainan county, is the talk of town after wedding a 30-year-old woman from mainland China's central province of Hunan, said the Taipei-based Apple Daily. Lin, who has two adopted children although he was single, told the paper that he was "instructed" by the gods to go to Hunan three years ago to find his future wife. He recently decided to tie the knot despite strong objections from his 68-year-old adopted son, who suspected that the elderly man was conned, the report said. "I must have a companion in my old days... I've never been married before so why can't I marry her? (My son) is unfilial," he was quoted as saying. Lin is currently applying for his wife to come to Taiwan to live with him, the report said. In 2009, about 13,000 Taiwanese married people from China, Hong Kong and Macau, accounting for about 60 percent of island's international marriages, according to the interior ministry.
I read and understand what you are saying, some of which I agree. Here is my take on some of the points in your response……
“…..if either party has been hurt or badly treated in previous relationships.....It may help if one or either opens up and says what they feel,this however, is always difficult as they may be unsure of the reaction their declaration will get.....
My take on this…. If both parties want, and are ready for a relationship, progress is achieved by frank communication with each other; however, that will not happen if they both drag their feet waiting for the other to make a move because of “being unsure of the reaction their declaration will get” …. In that case, how would one decide who makes the first move? In my opinion both parties should equally be prepared to take a risk rather than sit back waiting for the other to initiate….
This is why the "lets see where we go" option is often the preffered approach as it does give both parties the chance to get comfortable enough with each other to open up completely and not worry about the fact that the may be lining themselves up for another "kick in the teeth" So one of the couple will at one point put themselves out on a limb
My take on this…… (speaking purely from personal experience), is that in most instances “ let’s see where we go from here” is often a way of saying "I'm not sure yet if I am ready for a relationship" or “I don’t really know what I want from you yet” or “you will do until someone better comes along”….
"I gave him/her enough hints.... Why hint. Why not just say and cut out all the I like you/Do you like me hints that are thrown out some are good at this game some are not and miss what one party is "hinting" at.....Just be honest and don't play games
I totally agree, some people are so not good at picking up on hints, and so often it is better to come right out and cut to the chase – but be prepared that the other party might not be looking for a relationship on the same level and therefore there is a possibility of rejection…..
A platter of cheese, slices of smoked lounza (a kind of ham), slices of red onion, small bits of garlic, slices of tomatoes, toasted sesame bagel all washed down with a large mug of Yorkshire tea .... lurvely !
I see the wisdom of your choice.... and have to admit I was very tempted to respond similarly.
However, I decided for the first option simply because the way I live my life now is influenced by a number of personal matters that have led me to adopt the live each day as if it was your last attitude. I know that choosing a wonderful romantic relationshp that would end after one year will end in tears, disappointment, hurt etc.... but I will have had a beautiful year of shared happiness rather than my current status of singledom and the loneliness that comes with that status....
I very much agree with your way of thinking as set out above together with Sultry's addition regarding people wanting relationships but not taking the time to deal with their own issues.
Additionally, I find it particularly irritating when the other party's attitude is one of "oh we'll just wait and see where we go from here...." that to me is someone giving himself\herself an easy option out while waiting to see what falls into his/her lap...
I feel we have work at developing relationships therefore we should at least have a clear idea if we are ready to enter into the relationship, what we want out of the relationship, and are we prepared to work at achieving our goal.....
BootyliciousGal Forum Posts (1,534)
RE: are you going to travel to meet someone you met here in cs?