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be kind anyway . . . .

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.
Mother Theresa

Each of us is human,we have our faults,if you choose not to forgive it sticks with you. Many times each of us may not deserve forgiveness, if we are to live in the mercy of God it must be given to receive it. I forgive you though you may not forgive me. I forgive you for hurting me, making me feel less worthy, for making me feel not worthy as a person.

I acted out of kindness towards you, I had not ulterior motives ever. Though you may never believe that know that is what I know in my heart to be true. I would do no less to a stranger or friend alike. I try to act in kindness first because I try to act in God’s mercy.

I will always try to be successful in all that I do and I know that I have garnered enemies because of it, they do not matter . . .the words of ugliness only breed ugliness that which I will not be a part of.

Though I try to be honest and sincere in all that I do, I have been deceived by those who do not do the same. It does not matter because I will still be honest and sincere for it is not of me to do differently. There are too many people in this world who are deceptive as it is that they believe that is the only motive most folks have. It is those same folks that believe someone else only acts in deception, they do not know how to deal with real honesty and sincerity. My words may not always be kind to the heart of others, it is not that I want to hurt rather it is my desire to be honest and sincere in expressing what I see.

I have spent years trying to create a good life for my family, to take care of them, provide for them. I believed I was on the path to do such a thing and it took but a moment for one to destroy that. I picked up the pieces and began again, creating a good life for my family, providing for them. To not to do so would allow that one to completely destroy who I am, I will not stand by and be a puppet to someone else’s ways. I know when I have serenity and happiness in life other’s have become jealous, I have seen it and at times it has taken away from my serenity and happiness. Yet I strive to not be open to allow others to do so. For if one cannot rejoice when another is happy they are a foe who wishes evil upon you. For this I strive to always be happy when others are happy and rejoice in their triumphs and not allow others to take away my joy. Happiness comes from within and is meant to be shared, for those who truly do not wish to be happy will live a life of ruin for all and there are many who will do such a thing.
I do good not for it to be remembered but as it is the right thing to do. It is the way of the Lord. To do less would be to dishonor what he has done for me, the forgiveness he suffered for way up on the cross.

I give the best that I have though often it is not enough, it does not matter as it is who I am. It does not matter that it is not appreciated or remembered, or praised. It is right to give the best I have as I only wish to be a reflection unto the Lord and to do less would be to not give him the most, the best that I am.

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Sep 2011
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Johnny n June

Of all the love stories I have heard I have to say this is one of the best, the one that if I were ever to find would want to find a love like the one between Johnny Cash and June Carter Cash. Short story they met while touring in 1961. Johnny was married to his first wife but had always had an attraction to June. Between 1961 and 1968 both of them went thru some real chaos in their lives. In the end tho, they not only found true love but true friendship.

I watched the movie again yesterday

. A couple of my favorite lines:

right after Johnny collapsed on stage from his drug and alcohol use. June came to his hotel room, cleaned out all of the amphetameans and Johnny was just waking up. They had just prior to this made love for the first time, and June had had second thoughts. Johnny was upset about June feeling like this was wrong between them (he was still married).

Johnny "Tell me you dont love me June"
June "I dont love you"
Johnny "You're a liar June Carter"
June "And you dont have any problems"

June then leaves and Johnny discovers all the pills are gone.

Later that day June writes the song, Ring of Fire.

As the movie and autobiography go later on it was with June and her parents that finally helped Johnny get off the drugs.

Her mother makes a comment during this time - "You're heart is already down there with him" and so true she was.

I dont know perhaps I am simply a romantic at heart, but the love they shared was special. It wasnt simply about passion and attraction for one another it was also about friendship. They were best friends, they became best friends thru their shared likes, values and morals. She made him a better man, want to be a better man and he made her a better woman, want to be a better woman.

Johnny was June's 3rd husband, and June was Johnny's 2nd wife but thru it all they were together for 35 years of marriage (and as Cash put it 40

cuz thats how long June had his heart). They had a good life together, and in the end some say he died of a broken heart. Johnny passed 4 months after June, but I have a funny feeling he didnt die from a broken heart . . .I kind of think he wanted to be with June again, he knew where his heart lay.

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Aug 2011
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Apples guys :)

"Women are like apples on trees, the best ones are on the top of the tree. The men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and don't want to get hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't so good but easy. So, the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top becuase they value quality.”

author unknown

I just love this quote

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Aug 2011
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You've Got to Stand for Something

Aaron Tippin : You've Got to Stand for Something

Now Daddy didn't like trouble, but if it came along
Everyone that knew him knew which side that he'd be on
He never was a hero, or this county's shinin' light
But you could always find him standing up
For what he thought was right

He'd say you've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything
You've got to be your own man not a puppet on a string
Never compromise what's right and uphold your family name
You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything

Now we might have been better off or owned a bigger house
If Daddy had done more givin' in or a little more backing down
But we always had plenty just living his advice
Whatever you do today you'll have to sleep with tonight

He'd say you've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything
You've got to be your own man not a puppet on a string
Never compromise what's right and uphold your family name
You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything

Now I know that things are different than they were in Daddy's days
But I still believe what makes a man really hasn't changed

You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything
You've got to be your own man not a puppet on a string
Never compromise what's right and uphold your family name
You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything

You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything

I know when I first heard these words they connected deeply within me. At times I know peeps see me as setting too high of expectations but the the truth is I simply try to do what is right. I believe you have to take that stand in life or you'll fall for anything. Those stands come about in the strangest ways at times but they do and when you give in just a little on those little things it makes those big things so much easier to fall to. Now I dont have a lot of riches and sure there are plenty of mistakes I have made but I try my darndest to do what is right, to do the right thing. I know my children have suffered in some ways because of it yet in the long run I honestly feel they come away with so much more. Now there is a difference between doing the right thing and being right n I am not talkin bout being right. Because when push comes to shove I see now that my children take that stand too, they will stand for something even if it hurts them to do so. Food for thought

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Aug 2011
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Decorating my garden

Awhile back a friend posted a poem (on another site) and in the poem it talked about decorating your own garden. Its been awhile, I havent been able to decorate my own garden for a long while and I missed it. It wasnt so much about decorating your own garden but rather refered to decorating you own life, ya know doing things for you, like making your house attractive for you and not in anticipation or for someone else.

Today I got back to decorating my garden. It felt good. I realized how much I missed doing that. Now part of the reason I havent been able to decorate my own garden has been due to finances, I was in between stable jobs having left graduate school searching for a decent paying job in this economy.

I finally found one job that appears to be relatively a go, tho I have a couple more months on probation having just recently started pretty sure things will be just fine so long as there are no budget cuts etc. I am still looking for a better paying job, or a part time position to supplement my income and help take care of some of the garbage left behind from my divorce and going to grad school. But things are finally beginning to look up. Anyways up until now I hadnt really had the means or felt I was able to do much decorating of my life. Then to be honest tho I started for a lil bit there was some emotional things that occured that made me not really feel up to doing anymore decorating of my life.

I had started one job and it became extremely stressful and eventually I was let go. I know that a large part of it really had nothing to do with me but the attitudes of a few select persons but it is still really hard to get thru. It seemed no matter how hard I tried, how well I did these few were doing everything in their power to sabotage my success. It was a hard pill to swallow and one in which I wish I had been forwarned about - it wasnt until the last couple of weeks that I had found out that I wasnt the first one to have gone thru this with these folks and it may have changed my decision as to whether or not I should have accepted the position in the first place or the manner in which I tried to deal with these people. Anyways when the end finally came near it was a mutual decision that this was not the right place for me.

Then during this timeframe I found out my father had had a heartattack. He lives a bit of a distance from me and we have only recently reconnected. I was scared and worried about him and emotionally it was very difficult to have him where he is at and not be able to help him thru this. We are still talking and he has agreed to come stay with me but he wants to do it in his own time frame and i understand that but worry between now n then. He is constantly on my mind and in my prayers . . I just want to have him get to know his grandkids and I want to be able to be there for him. I am the only one who really will or can care for him and it is hard waiting for him - tho now I have set a timeframe by which if he doesnt get here I will lasso him here. Thankfully where we live now is agreeable to him, he refused to move to the South where we were at :)

Anyways during the same time frame I reconnected with someone I thought was very special but then he went poof. It was hard to understand, still is but I am accepting things the way they are. I didnt move here for him and I will continue to do what I need to for my family.

So today, the last couple of days I am getting back to decorating my life

Starting to put together my oldest daughter's room. Painted a couple of benches a nice apple green she had picked out. Planning on a couple of refurbishments to her dresser - painting it white and apple green. Then all she will need next is a white metal bed frame, some curtains to match and her room should be pretty set to go. I am getting back into cooking and baking something I slacked on this summer. Decorating my life, my world

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Aug 2011
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Keep It Between the Lines . . . .

I remember the first time I heard these words, I thought omg they are so true. So often in life I have had the phrase come thru my head whether I was dealing with a wayward 16 year old, a toddler trying to reach out, or an adult seeking advice. How many times have we wanted to step outside of the line just for a moment for our own self serving? All we had to do is keep it between the lines and somehow things work out.

I know sometimes the music goes well but I guess I have always been a word kind of person, the meaning comes first from the words placed down and the music accompanies it. In my days I am trying to keep it between the lines . . . .

Keep It Between the Lines - Ricky Van Shelton
He was sitting beside me in the pa*senger seat
As I looked through the windshield at the quiet little street
He was smiling so proud as he gave me the key
But inside I knew he was as nervous as me

And I said daddy oh daddy are you sure I know how
Are you sure that I'm ready to drive this car now
He said I'm right here beside you and you're gonna do fine
All you gotta do is keep it between the lines

'Cause it's a long narrow road
Only the good Lord knows where it leads in the end but you got to begin
So keep your hands on the wheel believe in the things that are real
Just take your time and keep it between the lines

I was sitting in my chair and sneaking a look at him
Lying on the floor with his coloring book
Then he caught me watching and he climbed on my knee
He said daddy oh daddy would you do one with me

Then I hugged him so tightly as we turned the page
Said I haven't done this since I was your age
He said I'm right here beside you and you're gonna do fine
Daddy all you gotta do is keep it between the lines

So we finished the picture and I put him to bed
Got down on my knees and I bowed my head
And I said father oh father I feel so alone
Are you sure I can raise him with his mommy gone

Then the answer came back so gentle and low
And words of my daddy from so long ago
Said I'm right here beside you and you're gonna do fine
All you gotta do is keep it between the lines

So keep your hands on the wheel believe in the things that are real
Take your time and keep it between the lines
Just take your time and keep it between the lines
Just take your time and keep it between the lines

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Aug 2011
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Smile, its a good day

Woke up this morning to the sun shining, clear headed and oooh feeling so much better. I took the plunge, let my heart speak for itself and no matter what may come of it it is done and I finally feel released. I finally feel like I was able to once again put things in God's hands. What ever may come I will deal with it but I am no longer afraid of what I am feeling

I accept it and even if it takes me a long time to move on it is okay, as a good friend said . . . tiny steps, tiny steps my girl :) and that is what I am doing.

In the mean time, I once again realised how much a certain someone meant not only to me but to my children. As the day draws near to when he picks up his dog, my youngest child is sharing some of her memories of him with me. She liked him very much, thought a lot of him and that means a lot to me - even if things havent exactly worked out. Because it means he touched her in a special way and so I didnt do her any major damage allowing him into our lives. It made me smile the memories she shared and thats a good thing.

The dogs today are running and chasing each other around in play. I love watching it

, warms my heart. One silly dog came to me last night and cuddled up to me as he is prone to do, giving me solace. I do believe he knows my heart and trys to comfort me. He has been that way from the day I picked him up. Sure he has wiggled his way into the arms of my children and basked in thier attention but at the end of the day he comes to me. I am thinking he seeks the comfort and peace from me and I do the same with him. The moment the kids leave for school he howls at their departure then comes over poking his nose and body onto me for attention. Actually demanding my attention as he is doing now

its all good tho, he warms my heart.

Life is getting on track. Plans are being put into place. Someday soon things will be back on the right track . . .feel it within me.

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Aug 2011
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A question of the heart :)

So there was someone special in my life for awhile and things didnt end real well, actually the person just kind of poofed. I felt hurt and confused as to what exactly happened and then a few meddling hands got involved where they dont belong which made things worse in my opinion - he said at the time he no longer wanted to communicate with me and was deleting me from his phone. I know what I felt at the time and am pretty sure at the time the other person felt the same, his actions when we were together at least said as much. However now we are not talking havent talked for a couple of months except for a few ill phrased communications via email. Then a little over a month ago he found himself in a quandry and I did a favor for this person with no expectation of anything from the favor. His dog had run away and I offered to go get the dog and care for the dog until he returned. I also found out at the time he still had my number. I felt it was the right thing to do to go get the dog and care for it. I did not and do not expect that it would reopen the door to whatever there was between us and told him as much. And I still believe that, yet having this animal around has been a constant reminder of him. I cannot just open my door and treat it like a piece of furniture I am not like that.

It is like this dog is almost a tallisman of him and it friggin hurts like crazy cuz I am trying to let go, trying to move on with my life and dont want to think about him. I want to let go of him as he so easily let go of me. I feel all friggin twisted up inside and it is driving me friggin crazy!!!!! I dont want to think that he will be coming back, that I may see him again but I have no choice but to wonder when he will come back because HE HAS to to get his dog. And I know it wont be to see me . . . I understand that but it doesnt change the way I feel. And to make matters worse part of the reason that it is driving me crazy is that I dont know exactly when, part of what happened was he took a job that has him on the road for weeks on end with no definite time to be back home so he doesnt know exactly when he will be back and the time frame is coming to a close as to when he should be coming back.

I question my sanity as to even offering to care for this dog knowing what he can do to my emotions but I just felt it was the right thing to do . . . though it brings about a constant ache inside. I dont want to obsess on the day he finally shows up but it is keeps coming to mind. I dont want to fall to pieces, I dont want to rant and rave. . . I want to be an adult, mature about everything and to have a little pride in myself and who I am. Yet I feel this constant battle inside of my heart 1) to run as fast and far away from him as possible and 2) to give him unconditional love as one human to another, as an adult, as a Christian showing love to others thru actions even when they may not deserve the action of love for what they have done.

what a mess I find myself in . . . . .

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Aug 2011
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Real Love - a definition

Love is controllable as the Lord stated for to "fall in Love" is not to truly love, this fall in love menatality is not necessarily a healthy love - it boads the we have no control. A healthy love is that which we have been told over and over is one in which action and truth are shown. How does a parent know that their child loves them? through action and truth in behavior, just as between a couple. The words or tongue are all fine n dandy but when ya get done to the nitty gritty ya want someone to show you love. Who do you believe more the person talking the talk or the person walking the walk? As the saying goes talk is cheap, show me the walk - show me you are who you say you are and what you say you believe.

Let me ask this does a child blindly love their parent? Is this uncontrollable? I would say that in any matter of the heart or love that it is definitely controllable through how we act and react. A child will withhold his/her love from a parent who does not do what is needed, and a parent can choose to withhold love from a child. It is no different in the manner of loving another except in what you are choosing. Do you choose to have and love one who completes you or one who compliments you?

And does love die when it is withheld or not returned? Why should it? When it is controllable you have a choice however the Bible states that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves - faith, hope and love but of the greatest of these is love. It is not a matter of loving another but perhaps what you are thinking of is the type of love for there are many types of love and each one does not necessarily work for another. It is then this choice that you must make - which type of love am I to show this person and not whether or not I shall love them.

Love is also not a joint decision, who said this. That to love we must first be loved by our neighbor???? No we are told to love our neighbor as ourselves, the benefit tho is that when we show love it is often returned (tho not always). Do you only love those that love you? I think not. It is something that is given freely not with expectations for with expectations then it no longer becomes love but rather a responsibility towards another. Love becomes painful when we expect the other to love us as we love them, I do not believe that this is what we should hold as love. Love is that one thing that we should give freely, from our free will. Have you ever tried to love one who loved you but you did not feel the same kind of love for the person? It is awful!!! Yet you can love that person by the actions you demonstrate to that person, by the kindness and empathy you portray. Is that not also loving?

Love is not a motivator, again this is going beyond the very concept of what it is. It places expectations on love that love itself can not fulfill. Motivate means to bring forth a desire, its an attitude in conjunction to an emotion. Love can motivate people but as I said it is not a motivator, there is a difference in this. I am motivated to do well in school, why because I will reap rewards from doing so. If I love others or another I can not completely and wholly feel that I will reap rewards from those that I do love. The very gift of love is that it is given freely if I expect to reap rewards from it then it is no longer freely given.

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Jun 2011
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This is a list of arose1791's Blogs. Click here for arose1791's Blog List

arose1791 Blog (9)

be kind anyway . . . .

Johnny n June

Apples guys :)

You've Got to Stand for Something

Decorating my garden

Keep It Between the Lines . . . .

Smile, its a good day

A question of the heart :)

Real Love - a definition

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