So what the heck are you looking for ?

I don’t know about you, but for my part, I’ve spent the best part of my life bumbling around not really knowing what I wanted, and the results of my confusion, was, surprise, surprise, confusion ! Yes a life times worth full,a mixed bag of results, mostly stuff I didn’t want, oh yes and lot’s of frustration and unhappiness too! And I’m not just talking about partners here, it included everything. I’ve worked at a variety of different jobs. Always searching, never finding.

Until last year, when I realized somewhere within all the heartache, that I had a choice, to go on repeating my life as I had always done, or I could start a new pattern.

I read motivational books and as a result of what I read I came up with this, it works for me, so give it a go,if you’re lacking focus or direction in any part of your life.

Get a pen and paper, go where you won’t be disturbed.It is important,it is your life we are talking about.

On separate sheets write your titles, Relationship, Job, Money, Hobbies, Travel, Home etc.etc.Take the first for example. Relationship, write...my ideal partner is… caring, passionate, honest,etc.Please note if you are not honest yourself for example, there is no point looking to attract an honest person, we must already be what we seek in others or we won’t attract them, or if we do it won’t end in happiness,so be truthful,or change your character and be consistent in your change.Next… my ideal job pays me a decent wage and I have more than enough to pay all my bills and enough to enjoy leisure time, my ideal hours, location… etc. Note no negatives, I haven’t mentioned what I don’t want, only what I do want. Sorry techy bit here, our subconscious minds believe what we constantly tell them, over time the more we focus on the things we do want, our little minds get real busy trying to find ways to make this become our reality. No I’m not nuts, I have a years worth of wonderful experiences I could share with you to prove this works.

Now you should be a little nearer to actually knowing what your ideal life looks like, now don’t sigh and throw it in the corner in frustration. Assuming you kept your ideals fairly realistic that is, you could have a cuppa and browse through one or two. Firstly can you believe it is possible for you to have a life like this? Believing is the first step to achieving. If you’re not sure, have a closer look at what you want.

Take relationships. If you’re single, what action can you take to attract your ideal partner? Write down a few ideas like, go out more, new hobby, dating site etc. If it’s a job, what do I need to be to get a job like this? Do I need training, do I need to approach an employer, do I know anyone who already works in this area, or could I write to the company and ask advice on how I could get employment there. Be creative. Ok, so draw up an action list. Now you may find that when you do this, that the things that seemed important are not as important now, and that’s ok, it’s your life. Focus on the important stuff for you and get going on making it happen.

For those of you in an existing relationship it could be a thing where you sit down and discuss regularly what you both want from each other, to keep the partnership alive and vibrant if possible, or as in my case, sorry hate to say this, call it a day and move on. I don’t encourage relationship break ups, but sometimes when too people move too far apart in what they want, they at least need to discuss their options. Life is too short to be unhappy.

Take some small steps every week towards your new goals, it may be putting a small amount by to save for a course, or reading some information to find out more, but slowly but surely if you persevere, and are determined, it will happen for you. Look at how a stream wears down rocks… persistence always wins. We give up too easily.

Ask yourself what do I really want and go after it.