Declarations of love.
I posted this on someone's blog but thought it might be worth making my own blog on the subject,so here goes.I watched the Forums and blogs for a long while before I decided to sign up. When you are not involved so to speak you see things from a different perspective,and I have watched with curiosity, and some amusement I might add ,people make declarations of love, both here and in the Forums.
Now while I might be optimistic of people's hopes and dreams, I have to say I am pessimistic when neither of the party's concerned have actually met!
I've seen couples loved up so to speak only to end up falling out in a very public area,which is not only hurtful to them,but embarrassing for those having to stand by and watch one person's hopes and dreams be smashed.
As this site introduces people from so many different walks of life it would be foolish,in my humble opinion, to shout to the World " I love him/her and want to spend my life with them" when the probabilities say different.
How do we know that we love someone just by an internet connection? It's an emotion that takes us over and sweeps us along, and of course everyone joins in this very public display.
I'm sure that there are many on here that have been in love with the idea of being in love, but some need to take a reality check, as they are toying with people's emotions ,and at times someone is going to get hurt.
We all need to stop and think sometimes that this is not the real world,and outside of here there is a completely different place that is called reality.
I say good luck to anyone that actually does have the possibilities of making that special connection,but until they meet and confirm their feelings, keep it to yourselves. j.m.o
In addition to my blog I would also question why someone would get their children involved in their online connections.
It's ok for you to "fall in love" as the adult in the situation, but what if you have kids?
They have presumably been through the trauma of parents splitting up. Don't you think it unfair to expect them to accept a complete stranger ,be taken out of a family environment and moved to a strange country with different cultures ,language ,food etc.
Just a thought!
Comments (37)
Have good day keep smiling I say
Thanks for the Knighthood mate
There will always be those who chose to be spiteful ,men and women.
It's a force of nature and some think it clever to belittle others.
Enjoy the banter and take it for what it is. They all have to age but some won't deal with it very well.
Feel free to post your thoughts. I take no prisoners
anyway back to topic at hand.
Whilst i agree mainly with the theory and of course the low probability of all going smoothly, I believe over a period of time with regular contact via mail and txting then maybe thru skype, 2 people could get to know each other well enough, after all they can at least see each other on skype so will know the physical make up of each other.
Learning about each other takes time, and of course meeting with that person would be a priority, but some situations do not allow that in a timely manner.
Hence the continued communication, after a period of time i guess ones feelings would be that of sincere like or maybe the start of love.
I am not sure if this makes sense as i am an old man and dont just bandy around girls names nor my private parts on skype as i have heard other old men do/have.....
So all in all, i can see some possibilities of this working, BUT, it has to be worked on by both people and given time to allow feelings to grow.
JMHO......
Good topic, should make for good comments.
off the topic! i hate those blogs/forum posts, i am bored i dont know what to do?or i am hungry! they using this place like twitter hahaha!
It is in the human persona to look for love and to dream. It can be the same here as in reality. The difference in this community, it is for all the virtual world to see. You give it a try and if it doesn't work, what have you lost. Maybe some pride.
It would be really boring if you had to live in reality and couldn't live your dreams.
There has to be some hope or anyone wouldn't be here. What is sad, if it doesn't work out, some people leave the site out of embarrassment.
Foolish,I don't know. Who didn't do anything foolish in his or her life.
We learn from our mistake, but in the case of relationship, it is easy to repeat the same one.
“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth.”
William W. Purkey
(b. August 22, 1929) author and professor emeritus at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro.
Ga da cobber
You've probably been round the block a few times,but from what I've read of past posts by yourself,you are still open to a relationship or may even have made that connection.
I'm not advocating that internet relationships are dodgy,just feel that some people go at it like bulls in china shops.
Skype is great, as is conversation, but the real deal is touching someone,holding them,kissing them.Then and only then can you have that magic feeling called love
Also the reality of life itself. Moving across the World to be with someone when you know nothing of their actual background is a bit dodgy to say the least.
Again just my opinion.
I concur....
it is hard, BUT not impossible....
Cherrie
we did meet and things are ok, and as you have said, it is better that it now be kept behind closed doors.
Brake up blogs are hell....
Thanks for your post.
The blog is not about pouring cold water on romance.
I am all for people connecting ,and would be the first to wish them well.
All I'm saying is don't shout it from the rooftops until BOTH parties are in agreement.
It saves a lot of embarrassment and hurt as this place is full of snipers ready to take others down, as I'm sure you will discover.
NO,
we met here....i will find that rock one day, i promise....
Basically, I agree with you.
"It saves a lot of embarrassment and hurt as this place is full of snipers ready to take others down, as I'm sure you will discover."
I've seen it and it can be a mess, but:
"You can take a horse to water, but you can't force it to drink."
You've just raised another good point.
When people make known their intentions on here and it doesn't work out, all of a sudden it becomes public property and everyone has an opinion.
I've seen some pretty awful comments by posters regarding other people's lives. Sometimes it's "open season" on here.
Feel free to post and I'll get back later.
Have a great day all.
Mickey...
Yep the break up blogs can be and are normally very poisonous.....
I'm not embarrassed to admit that I'm guilty of this and I learned my lesson to keep it real. I've had mails from other members claiming our flirting through the forums were sickening - hope they all have recovered by now. On the bright side, I've made it almost into the top 10 of ecard makers because he was such an inspiration
Am watching the tennis.
besides so much fun and games today here....
was scared to leave my "neighborhood" for a while....
Saw that you found your way there,
sorry i wasnt at the door to welcome you.....
and tea it will be....
by the way, you must have some power to get your other post taken away.....
Bit like here sometimes.
When you enter a Library you dont read all the books you choose what you like.
Likewise when buying a news paper you glance at the headlines first
and then decide.
Sure some people do have the time and money to read all the books and buy all the papers. But they still have the onus of responsibility to the words used from Knowledge gained or knowledge shared It is often the use of this onus that proves Wisdom or folly.
Nice blog by the way
Online behavior of many individuals and that in real life are very much the same. If a person being sour about their online relationship - means - so are they in their real life, and watching this person in or out a relationship its very easy to see a whole picture of their personality.
I love to read love stories, either with happy end or without, but i never thing too much about their content but rather the ways of how people can manage maybe difficult or not so pleasant circumstances. what can characterize a person the best? Whether they are ladies and gentlemen or wild stone age people who cant resolve their problems without a club?
Betrayal, cowardice, there's no need to write about it, people show themselves much more thru thier comments, than they could ever think of it.
I dont really get the second part about kids, what do they have to do with online relationship of their parent/parents, which didnt work out?..
Clear and well spoken with the honest clarifications we all claim to be in search of!
"I dont really get the second part about kids, what do they have to do with online relationship of their parent/parents, which didnt work out?.."
Everything in my opinion!
My point is that IF you go on to take the relationship into the real world,you must consider the feelings of children from one or both partners in this new relationship,who have maybe had bad experiences of their parent's separation, and may not want to move somewhere else leaving everything that is familiar to them behind.
These are two very different topics Mick, pity u combined them in one blog, and i suggest u can write another blog about children only, would be very interesting to debate
ok, just in case u wont do that:
as a parent, Mick, u mustave learnt how to make decisions for your children and then never regret it, if even they might be wrong.
Its hard, I agree, but you gotta learn how to take responsibility for those you love, and not being afraid to be called a bad daddy, anyway its just temporary and the weather will change another day.
Of course, everything is up to timing, nobody expects you Mick to go to another country or bring somebody in your house right after the divorce.
I believe 2-3 years are the right period to let things cool down and take the next move.
Life is all about moves, u cant stay at one place and pretend that u live.
And sure, you must never ignore the opinion of ur kids, but never let them rule ur life, believe me you can do it much better as a grown up, smart man.
Thanks for your reply.
My blog was based on what I have seen in the Forums ,and on here re declarations of love .
The addition at the end was an afterthought.
Speaking for myself,I would not even consider another relationship, especially with someone from a foreign country, unless my children were grown and able to fend for themselves.
They are and always will be my priority.