My church my mountain

Hi all...im write again...
Are you know im really miss mountain...
I miss how wind around me,play my hair
I miss how top mountain with sunrise
I miss pray in top mountain say "hi" for my God because mountain is my church
I miss get my step for trekking
I miss carry my backpack
Ohh all still about nature...

I was failed about anything in my life...
Broken home
How i was fight with my mom (be honest im sad about this)
How i have far relationship with my brother (never send messages or call like stranger)
Im stop my college
Many company reject me because my physic
Almost all my friends going to married

I try for understand about my life
Always remind myself "many many peoples have more bad life than me"
I try say "okay God..this my life what u want from me"
I was thinking about killing myself

But i make myself more stronger with pray
Im try better more better
Im get scholarship training hospitality in nusa dua bali for 6 months and hope get a job after training
I can't wait something nice will happen of me
Try for not complain and always grateful
Who know about the future??

I hope you still there my soulmate...hope we can meet soon and we can trekking my church together get top mountain.