Do you care about distance (134)
Laura25: I certainly do care about the distance.
But if I were in your predicament, I would make a LDR work; everything is possible if one or both are willing and have means(financial and time-wise) to travel, often. If that condition is not met, you are just setting yourself (and someone else) for a disappointment.
But if I were in your predicament, I would make a LDR work; everything is possible if one or both are willing and have means(financial and time-wise) to travel, often. If that condition is not met, you are just setting yourself (and someone else) for a disappointment.
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sasseez:
If the right person for you is a distace away why give up the one you have been looking for, if it feels right and your both totaly intune with each other why waste an opertunity to be with that special one. distance can be worked out.
If the right person for you is a distace away why give up the one you have been looking for, if it feels right and your both totaly intune with each other why waste an opertunity to be with that special one. distance can be worked out.
Because if non of the two is capable/willing/has-means to travel to be with their romantic interest,
they will never find out if they are meant for each other or not.
"True love" is my fave CS cliché -
ppl throw this "condition" around as if it's some kind of a physical feature:
"...if it{true love} is there, I don't care
about the distance..." ------ This thread is Archived ------
In response to: I got on here because i live in a small town there isnt much selection but when i got on the internet i thought the greatest thing about it is there might be a girl some where out there stuck in her small town or city looking for a guy like me its kind of exciting to think about because you would never have known that they ever existed who is to say your match lives in your home town obviously money can make it a problem or time but isnt it worth the adventure of what IF........
im in two minds with this .....
from my own personal experience pple can be totally different in person , no matter how long you have been emailing , writing ect ... it cab make a huge difference the lenghts of time inbetween seeing each other. people can change in even the shortest periods of time ...
yet saying that the optimist in me would still like to believe that if it were the "mr. right" love would triumph
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PeachesandRay: Distance shouldn't be an issue unless you allow it to be. I moved 750 miles (as the crow flies), NH to NC, to get married.
It's 900 someodd miles driving.
It's 900 someodd miles driving.
I'm happy for you.
But, with the cost of travel, LDRs have some built-in negatives.
Love can conquer all, but still, it makes sense to look locally first.
The odds that one's "soulmate" lives in on the other side of the ocean are no better than if they live on the same side.
Less in fact because there are cultural, financial, legal, professional, and logistical problems to overcome.
If you happen to fall in love with a foreigner on the basis of an internet relationship, well, it's too late for reason.
But it's not going to be easy, and things would work out better in many ways if you had narrowed your search filter down to a 500 mile radius or less.
If there's not a single suitable potential partner in that distance, your standards must be really high, and chances are, that love on the other side of the world is going to fall short as well once you get close enough to see them.
It's just not true to say that it shouldn't matter.
It will matter in all sorts of ways.
It's not impossible that it will work out, as you have proven.
But the distance makes it a lot less probable.
I nearly married in Japan, in Indonesia, and in Taiwan, and I fially married a French woman who I met in Japan. So it's not like I don't believe in international marriages. But it's hard even when you both live in the same country, and even harder when you don't.
I only say that so people know what they're getting into.
I wish them well in any case.
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Laura25: Because if non of the two is capable/willing/has-means to travel to be with their romantic interest,
they will never find out if they are meant for each other or not.
"True love" is my fave CS cliché -
ppl throw this "condition" around as if it's some kind of a physical feature:
"...if it{true love} is there, I don't care about the distance..."
they will never find out if they are meant for each other or not.
"True love" is my fave CS cliché -
ppl throw this "condition" around as if it's some kind of a physical feature:
"...if it{true love} is there, I don't care about the distance..."
Exactly Laura.
Over "romantization" (is that a word?) of what "love" is all about leads to hopeless fantasies.
The "perfect" match doesn't even exist.
There are always going to be some problems points of contention that have to be faced and overcome.
That's what real love is about.
Not a treasure hunt for the ideal match hidden somewhere in the world.
Entire cultures have existed where arranged marriages were the rule. And despite popular myth, those cultures are not necessarily any less happy as a result.
I'm not proposing that for us here, it's not our culture.
But just to say that pragmatism is just as valid a criteria for seeking a mate as romance.
Jane Austin's books are good at showing the importance of balancing romance with practical rationality.
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catlynn04: Would you be willing to buy a ticket and go see HER?? If not, that attitude would seem pretty inflexible and unfair to me.
Or perhaps just a confession of financial impossibility.
There's a lot of that going around nowadays.
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pikengren:
Haha..
wink right back at ya...I don't want to be misunderstood -
people meet each other under different circumstances and do fall in love regardless of the distance and of what we all say on here.
But if/when it happens, they face this dilemma to solve {the long distance}.
Is it easy to handle? No.
But if they can manage, more power to them.
To hunt someone{strangers} who is out of your reach specifically,
purposely overlooking/ignoring/dismissing people in your area{equal strangers}...
...to me it sounds almost as pursuing a specific agenda, and it's not a 'searching-for-love'. What's the reason(s) might be?
Hi D.
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Laura25: Haha.. wink right back at ya...
I don't want to be misunderstood -
people meet each other under different circumstances and do fall in love regardless of the distance and of what we all say on here.
But if/when it happens, they face this dilemma to solve {the long distance}.
Is it easy to handle? No.
But if they can manage, more power to them.
To hunt someone{strangers} who is out of your reach specifically,
purposely overlooking/ignoring/dismissing people in your area{equal strangers}...
...to me it sounds almost as pursuing a specific agenda, and it's not a 'searching-for-love'. What's the reason(s) might be?
Hi D.
I don't want to be misunderstood -
people meet each other under different circumstances and do fall in love regardless of the distance and of what we all say on here.
But if/when it happens, they face this dilemma to solve {the long distance}.
Is it easy to handle? No.
But if they can manage, more power to them.
To hunt someone{strangers} who is out of your reach specifically,
purposely overlooking/ignoring/dismissing people in your area{equal strangers}...
...to me it sounds almost as pursuing a specific agenda, and it's not a 'searching-for-love'. What's the reason(s) might be?
Hi D.
self preservation?
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707ryan: I got on here because i live in a small town there isnt much selection but when i got on the internet i thought the greatest thing about it is there might be a girl some where out there stuck in her small town or city looking for a guy like me its kind of exciting to think about because you would never have known that they ever existed who is to say your match lives in your home town obviously money can make it a problem or time but isnt it worth the adventure of what IF........
Distances are meant to be bridged. You shouldn't make distance an issue, except when you're not quite ready for a LDR. We now live in a global village, at least that's what the world has evolved into courtesy of modern technology. Go for it buddy and don't let anybody or anything hold you back.
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PILOLO: Distances are meant to be bridged. You shouldn't make distance an issue, except when you're not quite ready for a LDR. We now live in a global village, at least that's what the world has evolved into courtesy of modern technology. Go for it buddy and don't let anybody or anything hold you back.
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sure i care about distance, wish she were here beside me now instead of the computer screen but you work with what you have 
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Cas that is a very true statement
caspatch: sure i care about distance, wish she were here beside me now instead of the computer screen but you work with what you have
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caspatch: sure i care about distance, wish she were here beside me now instead of the computer screen but you work with what you have
Absolutly.
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pikengren: self preservation?
...as in coping mechanism we need to prevent emotional trauma? lol
Oh, ok, yes. A very good point, D. -
dealing with some one near to us can get too bloody real and impossible to cope. Gotcha...
You are right by the way, it's[self preservation] very common in here from my observation.
With a few exceptions of course, like OP, for instance,... \/\/\/
707ryan: I got on here because i live in a small town there isnt much selection but when i got on the internet i thought the greatest thing about it is there might be a girl some where out there stuck in her small town or city looking for a guy like me its kind of exciting to think about because you would never have known that they ever existed who is to say your match lives in your home town obviously money can make it a problem or time but isnt it worth the adventure of what IF........
The best of luck to find 'her' and make it work, Ryan.
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To much distance is a problem for me. I own a small plane and that helps but get past a couple hundred miles and I am out....
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Hmm dunno ..................... sometimes it is a problem and other times i dont think about it so only time will tell i guess
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RayfromUSA: I'm happy for you.
But, with the cost of travel, LDRs have some built-in negatives.
Love can conquer all, but still, it makes sense to look locally first.
The odds that one's "soulmate" lives in on the other side of the ocean are no better than if they live on the same side.
Less in fact because there are cultural, financial, legal, professional, and logistical problems to overcome.
If you happen to fall in love with a foreigner on the basis of an internet relationship, well, it's too late for reason.
But it's not going to be easy, and things would work out better in many ways if you had narrowed your search filter down to a 500 mile radius or less.
If there's not a single suitable potential partner in that distance, your standards must be really high, and chances are, that love on the other side of the world is going to fall short as well once you get close enough to see them.
It's just not true to say that it shouldn't matter.
It will matter in all sorts of ways.
It's not impossible that it will work out, as you have proven.
But the distance makes it a lot less probable.
I nearly married in Japan, in Indonesia, and in Taiwan, and I fially married a French woman who I met in Japan. So it's not like I don't believe in international marriages. But it's hard even when you both live in the same country, and even harder when you don't.
I only say that so people know what they're getting into.
I wish them well in any case.
i like your response but u did say a ldr worked for u so it is possiblethank youBut, with the cost of travel, LDRs have some built-in negatives.
Love can conquer all, but still, it makes sense to look locally first.
The odds that one's "soulmate" lives in on the other side of the ocean are no better than if they live on the same side.
Less in fact because there are cultural, financial, legal, professional, and logistical problems to overcome.
If you happen to fall in love with a foreigner on the basis of an internet relationship, well, it's too late for reason.
But it's not going to be easy, and things would work out better in many ways if you had narrowed your search filter down to a 500 mile radius or less.
If there's not a single suitable potential partner in that distance, your standards must be really high, and chances are, that love on the other side of the world is going to fall short as well once you get close enough to see them.
It's just not true to say that it shouldn't matter.
It will matter in all sorts of ways.
It's not impossible that it will work out, as you have proven.
But the distance makes it a lot less probable.
I nearly married in Japan, in Indonesia, and in Taiwan, and I fially married a French woman who I met in Japan. So it's not like I don't believe in international marriages. But it's hard even when you both live in the same country, and even harder when you don't.
I only say that so people know what they're getting into.
I wish them well in any case.
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bamabulldog08: To much distance is a problem for me. I own a small plane and that helps but get past a couple hundred miles and I am out....
i thinking if u have your own plane u definitely have a better chance at it lol------ This thread is Archived ------
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I do. And we met via the computer. I'm here to chat with friends.