To reply or not to reply..... (43)
sammy7776Ballina, Donegal Ireland6 Threads 56 PostsIf you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
sammy7776: If you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
Just say you're mailing someone at the moment and you want to concentrate on him..Its not insulting or rude and should be accepted without bitterness....
sammy7776: If you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
It's a personal choice to answer or not.
Don't take the put-downs personally, some folks just prefer to think that a rejection is because you have a problem rather than think they themselves are undesirable/unattractive
I'm in the polite "Thanks but no thanks" camp. You dont have to go anymore deeper into it.
Just let's them know it won't work is all.
I've read other opinions on this by other women here in the forums and some seem to get rude mails back. I say chalk it down to a good decision on your part and ignore them and move on.
On the other side, if someone finds you unattractive and they're not willing to get to know you based purely on your looks then it's better that it doesn't go further in my humble opinion. In that case a "Thanks but no thanks" mail is a God-send.
Just let's them know it won't work is all.
I've read other opinions on this by other women here in the forums and some seem to get rude mails back. I say chalk it down to a good decision on your part and ignore them and move on.
On the other side, if someone finds you unattractive and they're not willing to get to know you based purely on your looks then it's better that it doesn't go further in my humble opinion. In that case a "Thanks but no thanks" mail is a God-send.
well from a male perspective it can be discouraging when we send mail and is ignored
a thanks but no thankyou can be done in a nice way
a thanks but no thankyou can be done in a nice way
sammy7776: If you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
Yeh I am in the thanks but no thanks camp, and if they ask you out then, like sky says you could also just say your mailing someone presently and/or thinking of meeting them. Oh and if they keep mailing and eventually email you 43 questions to get to know you better (yesterdays mail)
have not replied yet still reading the questions 
I don't get much mail... 
But If someone contacts me and I find myself completely disinterested - I usually mention that I'm chasing someone at the moment, but thanks for the interest.
(...wish I was chasing someone!
)
But If someone contacts me and I find myself completely disinterested - I usually mention that I'm chasing someone at the moment, but thanks for the interest.
(...wish I was chasing someone!
)
hav to say iv replied to every email i get (well have skipped the scammers cos theyre so easy to spot), i think its rude not to, after all its takes courage to send an email and not to get a reply isnt very nice 
it says a lot about a person if he/she doesn't reply.
Ignoring somebody in the hope that they will get the hint is just cowardly. The decent thing is to send a polite response, even if you are not interested. It's just a common courtesy. If somebody doesn't reposnd to me, I think to myself, 'ok, she is not interested, that's fair enough, but she's obviously a bit of a cow so good luck to her!!'.
Ignoring somebody in the hope that they will get the hint is just cowardly. The decent thing is to send a polite response, even if you are not interested. It's just a common courtesy. If somebody doesn't reposnd to me, I think to myself, 'ok, she is not interested, that's fair enough, but she's obviously a bit of a cow so good luck to her!!'.
In response to: If you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
Personally I havent been on here very long and I havent sent many mails but the ones I have sent most werent answered
I wouldnt send a second mail cause if someone is pretentious enough to completely ignore someone like that they're not worth the effort.
However I am sure there is plenty of guys out there sending lots of mails ( seen as though every woman on here complains about their dilemma of what to do when men keep mailing them .(pity about ye )
My suggestion is this if your not interested just a quick mail back explaining your not interested. you dont need to be rude. I'm sure most men are quite flattering or at least try to be.If at that point someone keeps mailing block them. Simples
I'm probably gonna get a backlash for my honesty but I think this site is crap and there is no women on here willing to take the time to talk with the guys who were genuinely interested in them because of all the dumbasses.
i'm tending to agree with you!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
zatopek: i'm tending to agree with you!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
Damn straight.I reckon there's a better chance of meeting someone in a library.
Have you tried any of the 'Meets' lads?
zatopek: i'm tending to agree with you!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
I think a lot of the girls here must think they are gods gift, so they don't bother replying in the vain hope that some guy from the cover of mens health magazine will come along and decalre his undying devotion to them. Well, all I can say is I hope it works out for them!
I used to always send a polite reply (not that anyone is beating down my door mind you!) but if I am having an off day I might not coz to be honest a lot of people take the rejection badly, no matter how polite and sometimes I just don't want to take the chance of an insulting reply telling me how awful I am!!
paphos: I used to always send a polite reply (not that anyone is beating down my door mind you!) but if I am having an off day I might not coz to be honest a lot of people take the rejection badly, no matter how polite and sometimes I just don't want to take the chance of an insulting reply telling me how awful I am!!
If someone is rude to you thats their problem not yours.
At least you would have had the common decency replying you can always block them at that point.
musiclover1984: Your of the minority as far as I can tell so Big up to ya.
Its a funny old game.
Its a funny old game.
Im old you see.... we ladies tend to mellow with age!
yeah, you're one of a kind!
I've gone to the trouble of sending long enough emails, and all I get back is the knowledge that somebody read the email and didn't bother replying. Sometimes they didn't even view the profile! I've no issue if somebody isn't interested. It's just a simple courtesy to reply. It's no wonder that guys have a reputation for sending short, bland emails. Why bother sending anything in the least bit considered if the chances are that it will be met by a stony silence!
I've gone to the trouble of sending long enough emails, and all I get back is the knowledge that somebody read the email and didn't bother replying. Sometimes they didn't even view the profile! I've no issue if somebody isn't interested. It's just a simple courtesy to reply. It's no wonder that guys have a reputation for sending short, bland emails. Why bother sending anything in the least bit considered if the chances are that it will be met by a stony silence!
zatopek: yeah, you're one of a kind!
I've gone to the trouble of sending long enough emails, and all I get back is the knowledge that somebody read the email and didn't bother replying. Sometimes they didn't even view the profile! I've no issue if somebody isn't interested. It's just a simple courtesy to reply. It's no wonder that guys have a reputation for sending short, bland emails. Why bother sending anything in the least bit considered if the chances are that it will be met by a stony silence!
I've gone to the trouble of sending long enough emails, and all I get back is the knowledge that somebody read the email and didn't bother replying. Sometimes they didn't even view the profile! I've no issue if somebody isn't interested. It's just a simple courtesy to reply. It's no wonder that guys have a reputation for sending short, bland emails. Why bother sending anything in the least bit considered if the chances are that it will be met by a stony silence!
I am disappointed to hear that is your experience, coz from what I heard from the females on here before was that what everyone wanted was a well thought out mail....
Strange old place like you said!
sammy7776: If you don't think you're compatible with someone that emails you is it better to ignore the mail or to give your reasons for not wanting to make contact. I have stopped emailing before and was told that it is always better to let the other person know why you're not emailing. Then if I give my reasons no matter how stupid they are, I get told I'm "insecure" and "have issues"!
Just ignore them, you dont have to reply to any mails you receive here, just reply to the ones you want to and if somebody else doesnt tickle your fancy then ignore them, I`m ignoring this guy at the minute, He mails me once a day saying Hi how r u and i dont reply because I dont want to
Primula: Just ignore them, you dont have to reply to any mails you receive here, just reply to the ones you want to and if somebody else doesnt tickle your fancy then ignore them, I`m ignoring this guy at the minute, He mails me once a day saying Hi how r u and i dont reply because I dont want to
Little does he realise what a lucky escape he had
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Created: Oct 2010
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