Commentary, no laughing matter. (15)
I think Jimmy Greaves said...
"Football is game of two halves"
"Football is game of two halves"
He's 31 this year: last year he was 30.' - David Coleman
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
Phoenix: He's 31 this year: last year he was 30.' - David Coleman
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
I'm seeing a pattern here.....did anyone notice these are all said by men???
MermaidDreams: I'm seeing a pattern here.....did anyone notice these are all said by men???
I think this is why you lot hate footy soooooooo much.
baldydude: commentators on live matches, races etc sometimes leave you wonder where the hell did he/she come up with that one, some are just downright funny, this one popped up over the weekend ...
"the second half is a continuation of the first half"
i'm sure there are a good few more, past and present, so please share them so we can all have a giggle
"the second half is a continuation of the first half"
i'm sure there are a good few more, past and present, so please share them so we can all have a giggle
"the big cuban opened his legs and showed his class" - david coleman about alberto juantorena, montreal '76 olympics
Phoenix: I think this is why you lot hate footy soooooooo much.
'Tis a bit early in the morning for that
Didnt some commentator at the weekend say that Cameron Diaz was on the pitch? Some name that sounded like hers and in the heat of the moment/excitement he says 'and now Cameron Diaz has the ball!!'
How is Trappatoni's English? A lot of people used to watch the weekly soccer show on Saturday's when Trap was training Bavaria Munich just to hear what he comes out with... hilarious! 
Phoenix: He's 31 this year: last year he was 30.' - David Coleman
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
'The ageless Dennis Wise, now in his thirties.' - Martin Tyler
'The Italians are hoping for an Italian victory.' David Coleman
'Peru score their third, and It's 3-1 to Scotland.' David Coleman
'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman
'Ian Rush is deadly 10 times out of 10, but that wasn't one of them.' - Peter Jones
'Neil Sullivan has stopped absolutely everything have thrown at him...Wimbledon 1, Manchester United 1.' - Mike Ingham
'Emile Zola has scored again for Chelsea.' - Radio 5 live
'This will be their 19th consecutive game without a win unless they can get an equaliser.' - Alan Green
'Martin O'Neill, standing, hands on hips, stroking his chin.'
- Mike Ingham
'Such a positive move by Uruguay - bringing 2 players off and putting 2 players on.' - John Helm
'It's now 1-1, an exact reversal of the scoreline on Saturday.'
- Radio 5 live
a few more from poenix's box of tricks
'Poland nil, England nil, though England are now looking the better value for their nil.' - Barry Davies
'West Germany's Briegel hasn't been able to get past anyone yet - that's his trademark.' - John Helm
'You don't score 64 goals in 86 games without being able to score goals.' - Alan Green
'It's headed away by John Clark, using his head.' - Derek Rae
'Celtic manager Davie Hay still has a fresh pair of legs up his sleeve.'
- John Greig
'And with just 4 minutes gone, the score is already 0-0.' - Ian Darke
'The USA are a goal down, and if they don't get a goal they'll lose.'
- John Helm
'I predicted in August that Celtic would reach the final. On the eve of that final I stand by that prediction.' - Archie MacPherson
'McCarthy shakes his head in agreement with the referee.' - Martin Tyler
'It was the game that put the Everton ship back on the road.'
- Alan Green
'Lukic saved with his foot, which is all part of the goalkeeper's arm.'
- Barry Davies
'Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.' - David Acfield
'Sporting Lisbon in their green and white hoops, looking like a team of zebras.' - Peter Jones
'Forest have now lost six matches without winning.' - David Coleman
'Poland nil, England nil, though England are now looking the better value for their nil.' - Barry Davies
'West Germany's Briegel hasn't been able to get past anyone yet - that's his trademark.' - John Helm
'You don't score 64 goals in 86 games without being able to score goals.' - Alan Green
'It's headed away by John Clark, using his head.' - Derek Rae
'Celtic manager Davie Hay still has a fresh pair of legs up his sleeve.'
- John Greig
'And with just 4 minutes gone, the score is already 0-0.' - Ian Darke
'The USA are a goal down, and if they don't get a goal they'll lose.'
- John Helm
'I predicted in August that Celtic would reach the final. On the eve of that final I stand by that prediction.' - Archie MacPherson
'McCarthy shakes his head in agreement with the referee.' - Martin Tyler
'It was the game that put the Everton ship back on the road.'
- Alan Green
'Lukic saved with his foot, which is all part of the goalkeeper's arm.'
- Barry Davies
'Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.' - David Acfield
'Sporting Lisbon in their green and white hoops, looking like a team of zebras.' - Peter Jones
'Forest have now lost six matches without winning.' - David Coleman
Jimmy Magee - That's a goal and a half
MermaidDreams: I'm seeing a pattern here.....did anyone notice these are all said by men???
How many female commentators do you know?
Hadnt Micheal O Muirehurtaigh some comment about a Rabbit chasing a Foxe in a Galway Tipp match in reference to the two players with (un)fortunate surnames
Baldy here's a few more from our box of tricks...
Funny Manager Quotes
'When a player gets to 30, so does his body.' - Glen Hoddle
'I was a young lad when I was growing up.' - David O'Leary
'Home advantage gives you an advantage.' - Bobby Robson
'It's the only way we can lose, irrespective of the result.'
- Graham Taylor
'We must have had 99% of the game. It was the other three per cent that cost us the match.' - Ruud Gullit
'The philosophy of a lot of European teams, even in home matches, is not to give a goal away.' - Alex Ferguson
'In a year's time, he's a year older.' - Bobby Robson
'The first 90 minutes are the most important.' - Bobby Robson
'Shearer could be at 100% fitness, but not peak fitness.'
- Graham Taylor
'As I've said before and I've said it in the past...' - Kenny Dalglish
'He was a player that hasn't had to use his legs even when he was nineteen years of age because his first two yards were in his head.'
- Glenn Hoddle
'I've seen them on television on a Sunday morning most days of the week.' - Jack Charlton
'People always remember the second half.' - Graham Taylor
'If they hadn't scored, we would've won.' - Howard Wilkinson
'Paolo Di Canio is capable of scoring the goal he scored.'
- Bryan Robson
'It was a game we should have won. We lost it because we thought we were going to win it. But then again, I thought that there was no way we were going to get a result there.' - Jack Charlton
'We keep kicking ourselves in the foot.' - Ray Wilkins
'I have a number of alternatives, and each one gives me something different.' - Glenn Hoddle
'Of the nine red cards this season we probably deserved half of them.'
- Arsene Wenger
'It wasn't going to be our day on the night.' - Bryan Robson
'Very few of us have any idea whatsoever of what life is like living in a goldfish bowl,except, of course, for those of us who are goldfish.'
- Graham Taylor
'If you can't stand the heat in the dressing room, get out of the kitchen.'
- Terry Venables
Funny Manager Quotes
'When a player gets to 30, so does his body.' - Glen Hoddle
'I was a young lad when I was growing up.' - David O'Leary
'Home advantage gives you an advantage.' - Bobby Robson
'It's the only way we can lose, irrespective of the result.'
- Graham Taylor
'We must have had 99% of the game. It was the other three per cent that cost us the match.' - Ruud Gullit
'The philosophy of a lot of European teams, even in home matches, is not to give a goal away.' - Alex Ferguson
'In a year's time, he's a year older.' - Bobby Robson
'The first 90 minutes are the most important.' - Bobby Robson
'Shearer could be at 100% fitness, but not peak fitness.'
- Graham Taylor
'As I've said before and I've said it in the past...' - Kenny Dalglish
'He was a player that hasn't had to use his legs even when he was nineteen years of age because his first two yards were in his head.'
- Glenn Hoddle
'I've seen them on television on a Sunday morning most days of the week.' - Jack Charlton
'People always remember the second half.' - Graham Taylor
'If they hadn't scored, we would've won.' - Howard Wilkinson
'Paolo Di Canio is capable of scoring the goal he scored.'
- Bryan Robson
'It was a game we should have won. We lost it because we thought we were going to win it. But then again, I thought that there was no way we were going to get a result there.' - Jack Charlton
'We keep kicking ourselves in the foot.' - Ray Wilkins
'I have a number of alternatives, and each one gives me something different.' - Glenn Hoddle
'Of the nine red cards this season we probably deserved half of them.'
- Arsene Wenger
'It wasn't going to be our day on the night.' - Bryan Robson
'Very few of us have any idea whatsoever of what life is like living in a goldfish bowl,except, of course, for those of us who are goldfish.'
- Graham Taylor
'If you can't stand the heat in the dressing room, get out of the kitchen.'
- Terry Venables
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Created: Jun 2012
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"the second half is a continuation of the first half"
i'm sure there are a good few more, past and present, so please share them so we can all have a giggle