Elderly/sick parents (99)
Glitch101: Exactly my point.
When necessity forces the hand,there are ways and means to give support at home,without pushing all the burden on to family members.
Making family obliged to care for their parents is neither good for either party as it can sometimes cause resentment,especially if their is more than one member in the family and only one has to take the responsibility.
When necessity forces the hand,there are ways and means to give support at home,without pushing all the burden on to family members.
Making family obliged to care for their parents is neither good for either party as it can sometimes cause resentment,especially if their is more than one member in the family and only one has to take the responsibility.
This is what happens more often than not, and for years one child is left to care for their parent and never have respite and so much resentment toward their siblings. It is sad, but in America it happens quite a bit.
I know a few others in other countries that it is common that three generations live together. They respect their parents and think it is a shame how Americans treat their elderly. But in this day and age, we have parents who were horrible parents and so the respect goes right out the window. I mean not just "oh mom sent me to my room without dinner" type thing. Parents are just horrible. Some who have grown up with good parents could never understand what others have gone through, so it is hard to say what is our moral obligation.
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Glitch101: As an afterthought to some of the comments raised in this thread,sometimes the care of a parent can be taken out of your hands.
A husband has the only control over his wife,not the offspring,so if supposing he wanted his wife to go into care,there's not a lot you can do about it.
Had a pal who's stepfather pushed the wife[ her Mother] into a dreadful home and she could do nothing about it. According to Social Services the decision was solely the Husband's.
A husband has the only control over his wife,not the offspring,so if supposing he wanted his wife to go into care,there's not a lot you can do about it.
Had a pal who's stepfather pushed the wife[ her Mother] into a dreadful home and she could do nothing about it. According to Social Services the decision was solely the Husband's.
Glad you wrote this Glitchy, I think for some of us who are over 50 should have some sort of Power of Attorney that the kids (if you have them) could be the spokesman for their care. And that is not just for the married ones. For ones who have more than one child like me. I need to get something going. There are certain kids (I have a lot of kids) I don't want to be the spokesman for my care.
My stepmother and I have talked about certain things like this, about if we want to live in a vegetative state or not and DNRs (Do not resuscitate). We said we were going to write something, but procrastinators that the both of us are...have not done it.
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Ccincy: When my mother became ill with a brain tumor I took care of her up until the day she passed away.
It takes a strong person to be able to handle that kind of care Ccincy, it is hard to see someone you love go through something like that.
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crazyblondeone: Glad you wrote this Glitchy, I think for some of us who are over 50 should have some sort of Power of Attorney that the kids (if you have them) could be the spokesman for their care. And that is not just for the married ones. For ones who have more than one child like me. I need to get something going. There are certain kids (I have a lot of kids) I don't want to be the spokesman for my care.
My stepmother and I have talked about certain things like this, about if we want to live in a vegetative state or not and DNRs (Do not resuscitate). We said we were going to write something, but procrastinators that the both of us are...have not done it.
My stepmother and I have talked about certain things like this, about if we want to live in a vegetative state or not and DNRs (Do not resuscitate). We said we were going to write something, but procrastinators that the both of us are...have not done it.
No-one wants to think about death, but it is inevitable for all of us,and people should make adequate arrangements to cover their last wishes.
A Living Will is ideal as there hopefully can be no arguments.
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Glitch101: No-one wants to think about death, but it is inevitable for all of us,and people should make adequate arrangements to cover their last wishes.
A Living Will is ideal as there hopefully can be no arguments.
A Living Will is ideal as there hopefully can be no arguments.
I think I really need to get on this too. Thanks Glitchy!
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I'm fortunate to have parents whom I dearly love and I would see it as an absolute privilege to take care of them one day should they need it. However, we live on different continents. There is no social assistance here, no free medical assistance and none of the support systems mentioned in this thread. It hurts to have the time we have left passing without being together, but they are better off than they would be with me here. As for me, I need not worry about being a burden on my family - there is no one to take up that challenge.
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online today!LadyDiz: I'm fortunate to have parents whom I dearly love and I would see it as an absolute privilege to take care of them one day should they need it. However, we live on different continents. There is no social assistance here, no free medical assistance and none of the support systems mentioned in this thread. It hurts to have the time we have left passing without being together, but they are better off than they would be with me here. As for me, I need not worry about being a burden on my family - there is no one to take up that challenge.
..I would.......
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truheart1941: ..I would.......
She is a goner then------ This thread is Archived ------
rebel2: She is a goner then
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truheart1941: ..I would.......
Awww Tru
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online today!rebel2: She is a goner then
go and iron your tights...... 
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online today!LadyDiz: Awww Tru
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truheart1941: go and iron your tights......
Shall i take them off first? 
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crazyblondeone: It takes a strong person to be able to handle that kind of care Ccincy, it is hard to see someone you love go through something like that.
Yes it was very hard for me to watch her suffer cause her and I weren't only just mother and daughter we were also good friends too.It hit like a ton of bricks when she passed on.
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online today!rebel2: Shall i take them off first?
....yes have you enough pads....?????------ This thread is Archived ------
rebel2: Shall i take them off first?
Oh the images in my mind....
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online today!Ccincy: Yes it was very hard for me to watch her suffer cause her and I weren't only just mother and daughter we were also good friends too.It hit like a ton of bricks when she passed on.
..as it did me C there one day gone the next
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online today!LadyDiz: Oh the images in my mind....
...hi Liz.....google the chedder gorge....in Britain....give you some idea....... ------ This thread is Archived ------
Ccincy: Yes it was very hard for me to watch her suffer cause her and I weren't only just mother and daughter we were also good friends too.It hit like a ton of bricks when she passed on.
We are fortunate in the UK to have many support systems when nursing cancer patients at home. The Macmillan Nurses are brilliant in dealing with palliative care, both at home and in their Hospices.
All care is done with the patient and the Family in mind,which is of the utmost importance.
Well done you CC.
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A husband has the only control over his wife,not the offspring,so if supposing he wanted his wife to go into care,there's not a lot you can do about it.
Had a pal who's stepfather pushed the wife[ her Mother] into a dreadful home and she could do nothing about it. According to Social Services the decision was solely the Husband's.