A question for those paying child support to their former spouse (37)

According to the FRO, any amount of money you forward for child support is strictly for food, shelter, clothing, in one word UPKEEP.
I am not a lawyer, nor am I a representative to the FRO organization..I speak from experience, and i was on the receiving end not the giving end.
For further information on this, you should make your free call to the 1-800 number provided to you, to inquire about your questions.
Laws, legislature and regulations are being changed on regular basis and if you do not keep up, then you are out of the loop and you do not know better. Keep yourself ahead of the game.
In any event, you want what is in the child's best interest, and if this means to put out extra money for him/her for the enjoyment of these activities, then so be it.
You are the better man for this and you will be able to say that you have done all you can to make things easier for your child.
I hope this helped you and i mean no harm to you or any other with different views. MAKE YOUR CALL is free.

what is FRO?

I don't think that the parent who does not have custody of the children realize how much is actually spent to raise a child. Support is just that and it should not matter what the money is spent on so long as the child has a warm home, nice clothing, toys, and all the other stuff that goes along with being a kid.

I know as a single parent just what does go into raising a child and a day doesn't go by that I am not shelling out some cash for something. There is swimming, skating, hot lunch programs, friends birthday parties, kids having sleepovers(which means movies and chips and all that) there are all kinds of little things that add up.

I don't think there should be any kind of rule as to where the money goes. And if there is any doubt that the child is not getting all he or she needs then that becomes a custody matter not a support matter.

Just my opinion

Excuse me? I spent 18 years co-raising children so I think that I have some idea where the money should be spent.

Family Responsibility Office - they are the gov't agency that administer court ordered child support, handle the garnished monies, enforcement, etc.

But my dear.. where would the child live if the other parent did not have a mortgage? I can understand your frustration if you son is not getting what he needs but he is old enough if he is in post secondary that he could either A get a job and buy his own shoes or you could send him the money directly.

It is quite sad that people figure they need to nickle and dime the situation. Both parents are responsible financially and in a number of different ways. If one parent is raising a child on her own (without the other parent in the house) and feels like buying new furniture for the house good for them.

Also I missed the part where mothers weren't allowed to buy new clothes. God some people can be so damn petty

I worked in matrimonial law as a legal assistant for many years, in my experience, and from most Separation Agreements I ever typed, Child support was paid in a certain amount per month, but in a separate paragraph usually there was a clause that an additional amount would be paid by one spouse to the other, for extra curricular activities that your child maybe enrolled in. I would think that if your child was enrolled in skating lessons, then the roller skates would be included with the extra curricular activity, and would then be an additional amount.

My point is that certain expenses - such as a mortgage - are fixed and are not influenced by the addition of a second or more people in the residence.

I agree that I sound (and can be) petty but, for good reason as I have been nickled and dimed over the years. I've always set my children's well being foremost and have been more than generous in buying school supplies (including a laptop for $800.00) only to be met with resistance when attempts are made to collect half the cost.

Like many in my situation, I seek nothing more than a fair balance.

Paying Child support is suppose to be for the kids. I recommend having a college fund set up for the kids with the child support going directly there and not to a bingo fund lol. Something like that only works if both parents can agree, but hey it is a idea...