the best place to grow.... ( Archived) (41)

Generally, I have found generally that parents in the poor countries are more attentive to their children than those in rich countries. I think that the reason is that in richer countries kids AND parents get sucked into doing 'activities' -- after school programs, second jobs, both parents working, sports, etc. etc, and simply have less time for 'being' together.

I have never seen the utter gentleness, caring and love that all adults show children -- whether they are theirs or those of others -- in Cairo. And I have very poor friends in Colorado who are the same way.

Here in Washington, I live in an expensive suburb and know lots of families: sadly not one achieves the that same level of child rearing. It is not a lack of love: it is a lack of time management and a failure to recognize that one's presence in the life of a child may be more important than their participation in endless rounds of kids soccer or basketball games.

Having said that, and thinking of India, I would not say that these generalizations hold up in all instances. For example, the horrible practice of child brides in India must stand at the top of infamous things that adults do to children. (See the story of Phoolan Devi, aka the Bandit Queeen.)

Oceans

Ok so, what is the solution...we all move to whatever country is the best? But can we all go there, would not the government at some point put a stop and say no more people here? And the people that move there, if many from a "bad country" and by that I mean simply what we feel is bad not that it is bad and the country changes...whos fault is that?

The U.S. is a VERY big place. As are many others in this world. Found it interesting the best countries...relatively small where much can be controlled what comes in and goes out...not so in America and other countries as well.

When considering the WAR MACHINE...ok, then look internal to China or Korea...the machine is really big. Heck, North Korean people are starving everywhere because of this machine. That is also available news out there. But does that make those countries "the worst" to bring up a child? I would say what town?

Where there is incredible crime in one place in the states in another doors are left unlocked and people live so much in harmony they would never leave. What I love about these "surveys" we all read is that that come out on best and worst places....there is a time crunch to study data, only certain places are visited and often times the few that are bad...a judgement is made that way and on the other had a few are visted that are good...and a judgement is that way.

Here is what I know. PARENTS are what make the situation. And we are really uneducated to thing that any country is inheritantly bad or good to raise a kid. I'm sorry, who is the parent?

I was raised in a not so good place and did not turn out bad. I have known friends that lived in a great place...had everything and turned out bad.

Just food for thought...

Abra, friend, we cannot say it is too late. There is too much at stake.

I agree with your take on the culture as a whole -- and in fact am giving a talk in California on just that subject in a couple of weeks.

But we are not impotant to shift things, and in a later post will try and explain why.

I'll leave you all with a riddle for right now, if that is OK.

"How were the neocons so successful to manipulating the US into attacking Iraq and into the 'War or Terror'?" That's the riddle, and I think the answer will be very isntructive and useful for us.

Later, friends. I've got to get back to work for a while.

Oceans

I actually worked for a lobbyists group on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C.

Cool. On the side of the angels, I hope....?

We need you back.



Oceans

You betcha. I'm going to check and see if they still exist and where they are on all of this!

Your group was/is involved in education/children/parenting/culture?

it was not a last shot

i posted because i didn't feel like unblocking you to answer.





you didn't listen at all to my point of view in our private email exchange...you just lashed out

and not in any kind way

well i don't need to be treated like that and i won't tolerate it. period

I did understand, you will not ever know how incidents i lived came back in my mind.... but you also forget your last sentence after all that you stated, and that is the part where the rest of what you were conveying left because in that statement you were placing blame that i did not subscribe to and reacted accordingly. That is what angered me, not the rest. It was as if you were placing blame where I did not feel it should be. And perhaps I did not respond in a kind way, but then you would have to understand some things also to understand the reaction. Instead of getting to the bottom line you took reacted in the way you felt best.