The Older Woman..... (24)

OK... HI everyone! So, I can't get over the age thing. I have a friend who really likes me but he's 9 years younger who's never been married or had children. It's always been ok for an older guy with a younger woman but not the other way around. I can't bring myself to think it would ever work with him, I've told him so and that I am looking for someone more my age ...... I need someone who I have more in common with... you know, a guy who's been through 'stuff' like, but not limited to, LT relationships or marriage, children, divorce...etc.... OH I'm also convinced that once Miss Clairol becomes my good friend and gravity my enemy, that a young guy will jet for the nearest 20 year old. What's everyone else think?

Well, I was with a woman that was 10 years older than me. We were together for 4.5 years. No kids, but we did own a house together. The only thing I found was that she wasn't into the same things I was. Basically, she aged me, so to speak. I found that I wasn't doing the things I wanted to do because she wasn't into what I was. Every situation is different though and it depends on the people involved! Go with your gut, if it don't feel right, then it probably isn't!

Hi Bellagirl: l dated a younger guy and l was 45 and he was 37. lt was a fantastic relationship and we got along great. lt was also long distance but we saw each other every other weekend. What started out as friends, slowly turned into love and we ended up talking marriage. (the only reason we arent married today is he moved to Guam for a job and my ex wouldnt let me take my youngest daughter out of ontario, so l stayed here and he moved there and ended up staying there).
Hey what the heck try it and see what happens..what have you got to lose.
Being with someone who is younger than you is just as accewptable as a man being with a younger lady. ln todays gerneration its totally acceptable and you might be missing out on just what you are looking for in life and would you want to lose that....

As for me of course being 59 I would not even consider someone younger, I have been asked out by younger men and I did not hesitate to say "No Thank you ending with a joke of course to not offend them"

But it is all up to the person, if the comfort is there but it sounds like u have alot of doubts and I think u already know it is not what u want

Dawn said what I would have said. You seem to be looking for permission to tell him no only because of his age. It would be an acceptable excuse if that was all but I think you'd find another reason if he was your age. Happy hunting.

I dated a guy 32 to my 46 and we got along great and the age difference in and of itself was never a problem. I just never worried about his losing his feelings for me because of my age. I wonder if this is really the problem, or if it's other things, like his not having kids, and not having other things in common with you. And those would be valid concerns to have. But nine years is not that much of a difference... IMO

I have dated younger men...it really depends on the man himself - 9 years younger might not be that big of a gap if he is mature.

In my case when it was the two of us we were fine but when friends were involved you noticed the gap.

if it feels right try it - you never know

Ouch! Giving the guy too little credit here.
Age is just a number, why do have to put an age limit on having things in common with him? Things like hobbies, romance, interests(reading, arts, writing) transcend age.
Of course we are talking about adult relationships here, so you pedos stay out of it.

I don't think it's about him at all, i think everything has to do with you.
Your insecure about your age otherwise you wouldn't think about him dropping you for someone younger or firmer(so to speak since you brought up gravity)
I've found that with older women too, you should have a big career, a house, car, cottage. One of the biggest reasons older women don't want younger guys is because they lack a secure position somewhere. I've heard a million times from women that they can take care of themselves finiacially but after they get serious it's up to the guy to fork the bills. It's expected because most older women are old fashioned that way.

There is no sane reason to drop another adult just because of age. If you have lots in common with him, and you both enjoy each others company then take a chance and let him decide.
Men are not as hung up on youth as you may think. There is lots you can learn from an older woman. Men usually want older women because they are more understanding, accepting, clear on their goals and less of a headache when it comes to being able to go out with friends.

Well that's what i think, so let the hate mail flow.
No anthrax though i have a kitty and a doggie here, so don't poison them because of my answer on here.
Thanx-u

You hit that nail well truly on the head there ibitadustbunny.

I would also add for any of you ladies reading this,

"Men are not as hung up on youth as you may think."

They are not as hung up on your body as you are.

For goodness sake Bellagirl, if the guy is going to run to greener pastures just because you're not as firm as when you were younger, then he's not worth having anyway.

There's a difference between not being so perky and putting on 50lbs.