Exercise.....................very funny......................... ( Archived) (10)

Exercise


Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say, 'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years, just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a bar and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a bar and by the time I leave, I look just fine.



guilty as charged myself

Good thing there are a lot of bars around here.

If, I would drink, I think I would look worse

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.


These were all funny, but that was my favorite! I paid for the year in advance to save long-term costs...and haven't been since renewing this year 'cuz of starting my job. That one hit home.

That was my favorite too

nice ones HG, my favourite is We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Thank you Paul you don't mind I borrow that line do you?

well, there's a bit of truth in that statement, right?