Having a full background check done on a potential mate... (47)
Nessa7Vulpine's Heart, Cork Ireland8 Threads 1 Polls 1,934 PostsBackground, frontground, sideground, underground whatever .... I don't mind.... It will all look great 
Nessa7: Background, frontground, sideground, underground whatever .... I don't mind.... It will all look great
No to worry folks. Nessa is take care of this investigation.
I guess for me, some things are worth my knowledge and there are some which I think that its only for him. If the informations are essential in building a relationship together then openness would be needed.
Bronze33: In the example the news provided, the gathered info was used in the child custody part of the divorce.
So??? did it help? or??? what happened??
Nikogas: So??? did it help? or??? what happened??
The woman lost custody of her children. According to the story, the soon to be ex husband brought up some things that he knew would set her off, then he recorded her outburst and had his lawyer present it to the court.
EMORTAL4U: total invasion of privacy how can one start a relationship..when right off the bat,theres no trust in each other
I agree.
rivame: Does that also count for work etc.???
If we think we have privacy in todays society we are kidding ourselves.
Can we also then say asking any questions about our past by a potential partner is an invasion of privacy???
I have never and would never do a search but am open minded to someone needing to do that
I'll respond to what you have asked/said chronologically. Work and personal friendships are two entirely different matters. There are areas where we can expect privacy and areas where we cannot. Yes. Many questions that are asked about one's past are inappropriate. Sometimes issues and situations are none of your business, even if the other person is sleeping with you. Now, I have a question for you: In some social situations, such as a college, "permission" is required for an embrace/kiss/etc...Now, I am not advocating unwanted advances and/or physical contact, but doesn't it wreck the beautiful and spontaneous ideal of giving/getting a hug? Have we developed into a post "1984" civilization where the milk of human kindness takes a back seat to cold, rigid, choreographed interactions. Sorry, check please....If we think we have privacy in todays society we are kidding ourselves.
Can we also then say asking any questions about our past by a potential partner is an invasion of privacy???
I have never and would never do a search but am open minded to someone needing to do that
Bronze33: What do you think of full background checks on potential mates?
Then what's the point of getting to know a person over coffee - - - - You can talk to a person, see what it says, then maybe check some things that simply don't "fit" or ask more questions . . . But full background check it is a bit too much
I agree with being smart about potential partners...but a full background check? Come on sounds to me that peeps are looking for something bad. If all you ever look for is the bad in someone that's all you will ever find
Bronze33: The woman lost custody of her children. According to the story, the soon to be ex husband brought up some things that he knew would set her off, then he recorded her outburst and had his lawyer present it to the court.
yeah, there is always going to be the bad person or con artist using it to their advantage, maybe she will learn that the outbursts are going to be to her own demise, I know that in the elevator of the courthouse some things were immediately shushed as the attorney said later they were sharing the elevator with another judge and prosecutor and the woman that was about ready to go off about the judge that had just handed down a more strict child support and schedule to the "wrong" parent could have been sited and got in a lot of trouble. and in that case no one had any background reports,,just emotions flying. I still think it can work both ways like most things, and I dont see it going very far away so I guess we need to smarten up...it is not the way it was before.....pretty soon we will have a world like that movie Gattaca.
To each his own
And while you are at it don't forget the HIV and other STD clones!
And while you are at it don't forget the HIV and other STD clones!
Bronze33: What do you think of full background checks on potential mates?
Bronze33: What do you think of full background checks on potential mates?
I think its a combination of one and two on your list, though if there are the means to avail yourself of information in the interests of your own safety, its a good investment.
I had a check done on someone and it was to my benefit that I did.
Yes, protect yourself
xxDandelionxx: I think its a combination of one and two on your list, though if there are the means to avail yourself of information in the interests of your own safety, its a good investment.
I had a check done on someone and it was to my benefit that I did.
Yes, protect yourself
I had a check done on someone and it was to my benefit that I did.
Yes, protect yourself
... Hello A .... that sort of surprises me but I suspect you must have had very strong reason, some deep and dodgy suspicions perhaps ....
When possible, I think getting to meet their family and friends can be a very good judge towards someone's character. To see how they are loved and respected by others who have known them much much longer is of high value I think.
RDM59: ... Hello A .... that sort of surprises me but I suspect you must have had very strong reason, some deep and dodgy suspicions perhaps ....
When possible, I think getting to meet their family and friends can be a very good judge towards someone's character. To see how they are loved and respected by others who have known them much much longer is of high value I think.
When possible, I think getting to meet their family and friends can be a very good judge towards someone's character. To see how they are loved and respected by others who have known them much much longer is of high value I think.
You are indeed correct, D
How very astute of you. Not something I would do as a rule but.....Just as well, as I would've come a cropper for sure.
I still hold with most people are honest, civilised human beings and I have no problem regarding issues of doubt or mistrust, there's just the odd dodgy one that comes our way, yeah?
Mind you, I've worked for the NHS..... what can I say?!
'the odd dodgy one' .... yes this can of course happen and that is when your other instinct starts to kick in.
Well spotted ...... it sounded rather serious .....
Well spotted ...... it sounded rather serious .....
xxDandelionxx: You are indeed correct, D How very astute of you. Not something I would do as a rule but.....
Just as well, as I would've come a cropper for sure.
I still hold with most people are honest, civilised human beings and I have no problem regarding issues of doubt or mistrust, there's just the odd dodgy one that comes our way, yeah?
Mind you, I've worked for the NHS..... what can I say?!
Just as well, as I would've come a cropper for sure.
I still hold with most people are honest, civilised human beings and I have no problem regarding issues of doubt or mistrust, there's just the odd dodgy one that comes our way, yeah?
Mind you, I've worked for the NHS..... what can I say?!
Yes and they are here on CS mostly
It wasn't but it could've been, R.
He came over here from overseas wanting to meet up and it turned out....... with WIFE in tow!!
It also transpired he was playing several women at the same time.
Needless to say, in true 'Karma' fashion, it came back to bite him on the bum.....
He came over here from overseas wanting to meet up and it turned out....... with WIFE in tow!!
It also transpired he was playing several women at the same time.
Needless to say, in true 'Karma' fashion, it came back to bite him on the bum.....
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