Yes Daniel I've been trying so very hard to open up more by expressing myself and when I do someone just has to comes along and has to involve their sick humor into it.
That's why I don't bother opening up as much as I would like to on here. It seems/feels like I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. Then I get accused of being a know it all in the process.
I guess I'm just getting people burnt out and becoming alittle tired of fakers and the takers.
I've had people on here write me emails and accuse me of not being the real person I say I am.
My only question and only comment to those people is.. I have a wittness who can prove I'm the REAL ME can they say the very same thing about themselves????
Alot of things have been building up lately and the stress from being on the site is begining to take it's toll.
I'm just so sick and tired of people cracking jokes when I'm trying to open up while I'm trying to express by saying what's really coming from my heart.
Pat this woman wants to hear a man express himself.
I have to honestly admit tho that I haven't really been listening to a particular man express himself cause I've been to self-absorbed in my own life and I need to start doing so before it costs me a very special friend.
Being loving and sharing love keeps love alive. Being loving and sharing love means:
When each person learns to take responsibility for their own feelings rather than making the other person responsible for their feelings of worth, lovability, security, happiness, joy or pain. When each person has their own and their partner’s highest good at heart. when we both support our own and our partner’s joy and well being. Both of us are considerate of the other person without giving ourselves up. When each person chooses to be honest and authentic about how we feel and what we want and don’t want. That we are each willing to speak our truth without blame or judgment. That each person stays open to learning about our own and our partner’s wants, needs, and fears, especially in conflict. I think what keeps love alive is each person’s willingness to do whatever inner work is necessary to keep the heart open to loving and learning. Controlling behavior is motivated by fear – of loss of self and loss of other, of engulfment and rejection, of smothering and abandonment.
When each person is willing to do the inner work necessary to heal these fears, they are able to keep their hearts open more and more of the time. Love flows freely when hearts are open to loving and learning.
This is quite a eye opener for me. I guess I've been in my own little bubble lately that I've forgotten that men also have needs too. For that I apologize.
My husband passed away a year ago woody so I know how you feel.
For me I'm not ready to move on and date yet and I don't know if and when I ever will. I have to admit that I'm scared to death of ever putting my heart out there for fear I'm going to get hurt again.
I guess everyone grieves differently.
As for your daughter having a problem with you dating again I'd give her some time cause she's still going through the griving process.
I remember when my father passed away and when my mother began dating after sometime went by and met and married my stepfather. I didn't like the fact that another man would be taking my dad's place or at least I thought so at the time. But then after awhile I realized my mother had a right to be happy again and that this stranger wasn't really trying to take my father's place.
I may take sometime woody but your daughter will come around just give her sometime.
I think everybody is different. I don't believe we should expect our partner to like all the things that we enjoy doing, but if both of us can come to a compromise about how time can be spent, I believe we are still then considered compatible. For example, if our idea of de-stressing is to go out for shopping therapy, my partner may not like the thought of tagging along and following me around. Similarly, his idea of chilling out at home playing his video games,car races etc may not excite me. But if both of us are willing to take turns to give in to each other's activities, I think the relationship can still work out. To find a partner who shares exactly the very same interests is I think is rare, I believe we should look at the big picture and give each other the space when necessary.
I doubt if my marriage would've worked out the way it did and would've been pretty boring if my spouse would've liked the very same activities I did. We felt there was nothing wrong with having different interests etc.
somechick Forum Posts (11,116)
Hi Tom.
Unconditionally Me
I feel the need to bring this back up.