I was a step mom of two small kids at that time, for 10 years and after 7 years of divorced they stay in touch and still consider me their step mom. I wonder what people really think and how will act and treat the kids in this type of situation, where you new partner has kids, living and/or visiting. My kids have step mom now, they don't know her yet. Should I make friend with her? I hope your comments and opinion not only benefit myself but people in the same situation.
He is a very special person, a true gentleman, very sweet, very romantic but I guess we are not meant to be, his destiny is some where else. My will still to come.....waiting!
What Feng shui says about this issue, but first for the ones who doesn't know what it, here is a brief description.
What is feng shui? Feng shui is concerned with creating sacred space, concerned with making the world around us into a balanced place where energy ('qi' in Chinese) can flow and we can be happier, healthier and more prosperous.
Feng Shui mistakes you can make. Leaving the Toilet Seat Up – Women have been complaining about this phenomenon for years... and with good reason. Toilets are drains that can suck wealth right out of your life. Get into the habit of keeping the lid down when the toilet is not in use.
Turn on: Kindness, good sense of humor, honesty, a gentleman, someone who can talk about his feelings, good communicator and listener, someone with character, ambitious excels to be the best he can be, talks the talk and walks the walk, romantic, thoughtful. If I don't aim for the stars I can come out short!
Turn off: Bad hygiene, laziness, not character, dominant, no manners, sarcastic comments, disrespectful, dishonest, liars, clinging, insensitive, conformist, unkindness, uncontrolled temper, loud, smoker, fanatics, someone with no dreams no goals, irresponsable.
It is better to work a loose schedule with your ex-spouse, than to rely on or have the courts enforce a mandate! But at times with certain persons,what must be, must be!
Hello JimEee, in my case do to experience with my step kids, I left to the side any anger I had, and do what is best for my kids emotional stability. I have not rules of schedule visitations, they can see each other any time they want, my son goes with his Dad any time he wants, (no to sleep, during school classes though) and my daughter doesn't go that much, she is happy to see him for a few minutes every day.
And about letting my date know I have kids on the first date, to begin with it wouldn't be any first date without him knowing I have kids!
Wow! I was out since Saturday until today because of Wilma and not internet service, and just read the treads, and surprised to find a stalker, never happened before, I am glad I wasn't here, feels a little uncomfortable, even reading, feels creepy. Never encouraged the guy just answered two e-mails. Don't know how he disspeared though!
Hello Sergi, what can I tell you. Well I have the same since always, I do good or help who ever comes my way. I have an interesting story. When I got separated, I left the house with my two kids, not even a bed to sleep on, stayed few weeks with my aunt and then move out with someone(girl friend) to share and apartment. I signed the lease for a year, a month later my friend left me and couldn't pay the rent but sorter out and they let my out the lease with penalty, ok. My friend, left me alone with my kids without even thinking about the situation I was going to left on, I survived. Years passed and keept talking to her,(I am not going to change my way of being because others people behavior) she was left out on the street with one small child and pregnant, I said "as long as I have a place, you will have a place too, come, I will give you my room", she cried, she stayed in my house for three months, without even have to pay a penny. But tell you something there is nothing I can ask her she wouldn't do for me. Be yourself, you will never go wrong! I see you are a very young man, enjoy life and learn, the right person will come alone when you less expect it (that is what I tell myself).
What I see and what I mean is; for example at my age and my experience I have learned and I know exactly what I want and don't want. I would not settle for less and if I have to wait I am willing to doit regardless the time it might take . Sometimes I may feel anxious and have the urge, just to have him close,just to hold me, hug me and it is normal, but I repeat I will not settle for whatever or because I want company. Being with someone doesn't mean you are not alone. He is not perfect but needs to have very strong qualities a base to built the relationship that I am looking for that in my opinion will last life time. I' consider myself a strong woman and willing to put all the effort need for it to happened and I know there are, good and extrodinary men that have been hurt too and willing to do the same, learned from his experiences. This search, hunting for the right person it is not something I enjoy, I want to ended ASAP and never come back again! Also a good example, I experienced rigt now are, the hurricanes, with Katrina I learned to prepared, 3 days without power wasn't something my kids or I enjoyed. So before Wilma I prepared myself ahead of time and bought a Generator, all the supplies needed. Water, food, filled up my car with gas, for me Wilma haven't be so bad and also have the availabilty to help my neighbors. Now with Wilma I learned to buy more containers to storage gas and parked my car in a safer place. What I want to say with the example is that some people learned quickly and make the effort to make it better next time and for some other people take a while and carry on their mistakes to there next experience and even blame other people for their frustations and mistakes.
God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other. Amen. Reinhold Niebuhr, in a sermon in 1943 US Protestant theologian (1892 - 1971)
Oh sweetie, I'm sorry, I can only imagine how you must feel. Please read the following inspirational stories, that is what I do when bad and unpleasant things happened in my life. I hope it do good to you as it does for me.
The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming.
Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect himself from the elements, and to store his few possessions.
But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened - everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger.
"God, how could you do this to me?" he cried.
Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him.
"How did you know I was here?" asked the weary man of his rescuers.
"We saw your smoke signal," they replied.
It's easy to get discouraged sometimes when things appear to be going badly. But we shouldn't lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering. Remember, next time your little hut is burning to the ground, it just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of God.
For all the negative things we have to say to ourselves, God has a positive answer for it.
Hey, Len don't worry, I can take a challenge, in fact I like challenges it gives spice to our daily lives, and sometimes dull life. I am who I am and respect others way of being too. Just imagine every body agreeing on every topic, I will be out of here in not time.
It is not that women don't want man in the military, I personally admired their courage and their kidness to service others, those are two big qualities I look in a man. When you really fall in love, true love there is, you become blind and don't care the situation or the person. I see you are a very young man, it is just a friendly advise, enjoy life make the best of it. I am not closed minded, just try to avoid future pain for you and your mate. E.G. is like having kids, is the finantial or emotional situation are not the right one at the moment, wouldn't you wait?
Sweetie you asked and you have received honest answers, tinkerbell is right on the dot. It is hard enough to get into a relationship with someone with the unknown written all over, to add one more risky factor to it. My cousin is the service and just got sent to Kuwait for a year he got married few month ago and for his wife is has being really though.
If he goes do my honesty, I'm really glad it happens, is a test he didn't passed. It’s his loss not mine and I am better off. The things that happened are the best that can ever happen!
I love kids, help raised two step kids for 10 years, it wasn't easy, love them as I was their mom. Have two of my own, teen ages, really good kids. My son says is ok as long as I am happy, never bring anybody home yet, my son (13) is very protective and always looking out for me. My daughter (15) is a little reluctant, she told me she is feels jealous, I talked to her and explained that she has nothing to be jealous of and that she always will come first, she seems more accepting. And as far as accepting someone's kids (very young kids) I really don't know being there done that. Very young kids need a lot of attention and I would like to enjoy my partner and have the freedom and time I didn't have. I prefer his kids are already grown but you, it is very difficult to decide when you find that guy you are looking for all your life and then turn him down, if I know myself and if he is all I want, knowing myself I would probably accept his kids. I just can’t predict the future.
adj4u, I agreed but I have noticed, people ask for honesty but don't know how to handle it, sometimes scare people away. Any ways that is my policy Honesty regardless the results.
Take care of yourself, you have a lot of people who still needs you! Sorry I didn't know about your loss, please acept my condolance. It must be very difficult but you are doing great, just one day at the time Roy.
sincerety Forum Posts (438)
Step Kids. Imagine you are stepparent. How would treat his or her kids?
Thanks Cheri & Nene great advise.Matches27, sweetie I am sorry to hear how your step dad treat you. You are better person than he is, congratulations, good actitude!