Sutdog Poetry (19)

Sometimes it seems as if the weight of the world bears down
Endlessly pushing, more and more untill it seems all is about to break
Evrything rushing, no time for yourself, The wonderful person you are
always putting eveyone else ahead, The helping hand that is always there.
Not everyone appreciates your selfless giving, or understands the needs that you have
While everyone is caught up in what can be done for them, pushing untill you can do no more
When you finallay crash, Unappreciated, and feeling alone.
Always remember, your never alone. I want to be that pillar of light
Off in the distace like a lighthouse steering ships to port
The one who you can count on to always be there when your in need, not for myself,
but for you.
To hold you through the night, and wipe away your tears.
To Gently rub your hair while you tell me all your fears,
To help you through your day so your not so overwhelmed,
and laugh and talk and cry together so you know how appriciated you are
At many times in this life, the battles need to be chosen,
You are but 1 person who cannot accept demands from everyone
Some things in life are meant to be done for the self, and the happiness it brings,
Slow down and enjoy while it lasts, it all goes so quickly,
I will be here for you, Forever and always
I Promise to always love you,
And care for you,
and be someone you can escape the hectic world to
so that I can make you happy, and show you how special you really are
and do the things for you that you deserve,
My Love, My Life,
My Princess.
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Copyright © 2009

Time
Time taken away, should have stayed
can't go on living this way
Left for places far away to buy the time to spend with you for days
the harder I worked the quicker I could be there for you
But time, passes, and slowly it seems,
time is catching up on me
moved back home to see you every weekend
still no time, always a rush

Daddy come play with me,
Its time for bed son maybe in the morning before your gone,
again out of my life,
your voice twinkles when I hear you through the phone
The time that I Had now has gone

washed away with my tears
and all these years stuck in the Vally
But Daddy Didn't see you enough when he lived in Iowa
so even though there were no jobs here
I came back to have Time with you.

The days now go on forever and the nights seem perpetually dark
to much time, to much alone since you've been gone.
eight hours away, my baby boy, I'll be with you soon
please understand it may be months, maybe a few
Saint Louis is the start point to get me back to you.
I love you with all my heart.
MY BABY BOY

In My Dreams I See Your Face
It Takes Me to another Place
Where Everything I Ever Felt Was Real
The Times We Shared Now Mean So Much
Remembering Your Gentle Touch
Can You Please Come Home and Take Away My Fears
When I awake The Dream Is Gone
The Night So Cold Now Seems So Long
As I scream you’re Name to Take Away the Pain
How Will I Know If You Still Care
When I Need You Most Will You Be There
To Help me Wipe away My Bitter Tearz.

Each phone call beneficial to the one on the other end. Who does the rock with the weight of the world on his back lean on. Happy voice and the positive attitude is just the paint on the face of one devastated. I built myself to adapt, but hate what I created. Miles separate those who need to be close, yet I'm more distant from those in the next room. My heart aches when I can't heal a friends heart ache, it's pain I learned to consume. A costume of success covers a soul so depressed, so I excel while I regress.

The twisting and turning, space and time.
My head about to explode, pulling my spirit from my body.

I feel it twist through the synapses, along the serotonin levels of time
to begin to make me "Normal" The label I heave been given.
Electric shocks, bolts of lightning from my brain, fire rapidly.

A pain and despair I cannot help. For fire lights my spirit, and electric is my sword.
Remove from me this crown of hate for it binds in the lightning, and may not strike, but only myself.
I am one.

A synapse.

I,m Down in a hole
With no where to go
Locked in this trap
Inside my mind.
Let me ask my inner self
When no one is around
Talking to shadows
For answers unsure
Pick like the game show
But pick the right door.
If not you will end up
Among the shadows,
Down in a hole.

The Feel of your skin against my hands
Makes me quiver with anticipation
I need to have all of you
Bring you to the edge
That spiritual union of two souls lost in each others body
The things I would do to you can't be explained
You'll have to wait and see, and trust It is all about you
My greatest joy would be taking you there
To that point, no thoughts in our heads but the simple bliss
Chills running down our backs as the moment nears
An eruption of emotions and feelings both physical and mental.
As we lay there starting to come down,
I hold you so close, and gently tickle your body with my fingertips
Making those chills run all over your body
I'm lost in your eyes, and the feelings are so strong.
I now start over and gently tease to the point again
Another release that brings us closer
The ecstasy I feel is you.

The Rain Drips from the overflowing Gutters
Landing atop My head Soaking to the bone
The peace I once had, Knowing I was
protected from the rain, Is now a fading
memory. If only I could go back in time to
when the gutters were not filled with anger
and resentment toward one another. Another
time, where they worked to protect me. It
seems the storm is just too strong. I am no
longer shielded from it's wrath. At least
the rain will hide the tears, as I watch My
parents say goodbye, Leaving me alone to
drown in the sorrow of the storm.

All the Bad I Ever Did
Now Lays Exposed No Longer Hid
In Plain View of Judgment Eyes
That Are Not Happy Till I Die.
My Spirit Lives, Free From Chains
No More Sorrow, No More Pain
I Must Now Go To a Different Place
And Watch My Body Laid To Waste
For I Am Free, No Longer Trapped
In Hell on Earth and Lover Spats
My Spirit Free To Live Again
Another Place, another Man.

You And I Alone inside
This Place I Love to Run And Hide
Where We Can Always Be Alone
No Knocking Doors Or Ringing Phones
Only Us With Time To Spare
As I Gently Caress Your Hair
I'll Kiss You Like It's Our Last Days
Before The Memories Start To Fade
Nothing Here Stays Very Long
It turns To Hate And Bitter Song
Which I Am Left to Face Alone
I regain My Strength And Carry On
To Face The World In Which I Dread
Loneliness Trapped In My Head.

The day of love grows ever near
But time goes by another year
Without someone to share it with
Or give that gentle little kiss
Why are you so blind to see
The love for you that comes from me
If only I could express in words
The artistic beauty in the flight of birds
When you come outside your house to play
And bask in warming sunshine rays.
The squirrels run down the streets and cheer
The coldness of winter no longer here
Your heartfelt smile makes roses bloom
In Multi Colors like Cartoons
A More elegant creature than a swan
Yet childish like the youngest fawn
You deserve to reach the greatest heights
And see your name surrounded in lights
Potential mates knock at your door
And Hope to be the one with more
You Hide your feelings and turn away
The clouds roll in and end the day
None of them can understand
Or Even Begin to comprehend
When you sit inside your room and cry
Hang your head and wish to die
But I’m still here throughout your tears
To comfort you and quench your fears
Your Beautiful Like the morning sun
The Tempting lioness who’s Lots of fun.
Although I’m just a friend today
I care more for you than words can say
And Love you for your mind and soul
And not for things like money and clothes
So As I end this sweet Goodbye
No Other Star could catch My Eye
I’ll sit alone and tempt my fate
I’ll sit alone, alone and wait.

“Even the Brightest Stars eventually fade to nothingness”

The Dream to Be With You Again
The Thoughts of Love Fill Up My Head
I Rub Your Hair
And Kiss Your Lips
Gently Caressing Your Finger Tips
Your Skin So Soft
Your Rounded Breast
To You I Give My Life and Death
I’ll Take You To
New Heights Unknown
We Dim the Lights, Unplug The Phone
I Kiss Your Neck
And Free Your Mind
All Your Thoughts Now Left Behind
Our Bodies Hot, the Passion Soars
Someone Knocks Upon My Door
As I Awake the Dream Is Gone
The Ticking Clock Says 3:01
You’re No Longer by My Side
Bitter Tearz Roll from My Eyes
My Stomach Cramps in Utter Pain
I Yearn To Be With You Again.