cumongirls2 Poetry (37)

Carol singers

Knock at the door, “Christmas cheer, not round here”
Move along and get “stick your Christmas song”
Try again but knock and knock all in vain
Try another “do I look like a Christmas lover? your mother!”
Another door “Stick you Christmas spirit and to hell with it”
“Warder” I am pleased to report
That Cell house three have vote unanimously,
Christmas carols will start at one
And won't be missed by anyone.

Children are ill

Rang the school so they would be cool
Children are ill so today they are going to chill
Buckets at the ready, trying to hold them steady
As one then the other compete to outdo each other
The Sons speciality seems to be reaching
And stomach churning sicking screeching
Daughters seems to be projectile vomit
And lots and lots and lots of it
Took a sea sick pill cos really starting to feel ill
Skidding my way from room to room
Large Mop and bucket and a broom
Now the smell of bleach is making me reach
And all I can say?
Is they aren’t the only ones having a bad day

Note in my diary

I must remember, the world comes to an end on the 21st of December
No months of Turkey and no Christmas pud, now that sort of news has got to be good
I wish I had known earlier on, I wouldn’t bought presents for everyone

Entirety

How is it that the beautiful of this land, can never see what we all can?
They look at hips and look at face and wish they could just erase
I look and such perfection, assembled in a heavenly collection
Not to big not to small, not to short not to tall, just perfect in your all
Why is it that you cannot see what is plain as day for all to see
I am to old, to fat I wish I could change this, I wish I could change that
Step back and look and see what friends, family and others can see
You in your beautiful entirety

Disgracing

Fowl mouthed loud cursing and that silly wink and a grin
You like a drink; I can smell it dripping from your skin
Fighting in the street and thinking it will impress
Will I did look at you but not in the way you think
My skin crawls at your drunken nightly brawls
I have seen you lay on the ground, wet patch forming around
You think it sexy, grab at my parts and you think its attractive

Well I am here to say, not now, not yesterday and not tomorrow
Would I lend my heart to borrow, you have fun with your friends
Me you would never see chasing someone so disgracing
I will save my heart to a safer bet and never give it to a Ladette!

I don’t need your Edge-u-may-kay-shun!
For me it aint got no relations
You can take your tangents, co sins and things
When I leave school, I is gonna be famous and sing
Music lesson?, woman listen stop stressin
They got music dictators and shit to take care of it
I got it all sorted, me and Bianca have fought it all out
She has a mate that cleans the floors for that Simon Cowell
She going to bang him a couple of our rhymes
And then roll on wiff all the good times
You can keep your Edge-u-may-kay-shun
I don’t need that stuff, I got talent I can sing

I was laid on my mattress thumbing through a World Atlas
Telling my son of all the places I’d been and all the things I had seen
I told him of my time in the Himalaya and how there I had met a dragon slayer
How he had taught me, all that he knew and one day I will teach him it too
I recanted my time in Algiers, where all the beautiful women had no ears
I told him of their great monsoons and of the races in cold air balloons
We spoke a little of Brazil and how I couldn’t find one single hill
Described the vast empty plains and how the elephants rode around in trains
I touched a little on the Arctic Circle and how the water was always purple
How Kangaroos bought and sold shoes and pigmies run all the zoos
He listened as I described Iran and the miles of roads made of spam
How all houses had moats and all the taxis were driven by goats
I love to tell my son of the places I have been
The story of my life and all things I have seen

Karaoke King

I think, No I know, I am the Karaoke king
(Please god no, anything but him)
You should see the crowds when I start to sing
(I’ll give you money, no! please! anything!)
O my god it’s an or-sum sight
(Ya! as they all run out into the night)
You should hear me belt out those Vocals
(They usually scares all the locals)
When I sing twist and shout
(Wonder how I can get out?)
And when I step down from the stage
(They think who let him out of his cage?)
I know I am the Karaoke King
(O poor, poor deluded thing)

How come Friday is the one, where we can’t wait for it to come
Saturday is the day, when we get to play and party the night away
Sunday is the one; that on Saturday we wish had not done what we had done
Monday is spent looking for a chair, after the weekend we’re still trying repair
Tuesdays are so bad, thinking of all that fun at the weekend we had had
Wednesday is the middle of the week and everything seems so dark and so bleak
Thursdays aren’t quite full of cheer but Wednesday misery does start to disappear
So why is Friday the one, where we can’t wait for it to come?

I watched her cross the floor
Pixy boots tip toe their way
She doesn’t even know I exist
Yet her power I can’t resist
Want to talk, want to make a move
But knowing it would just come out crude
A terrible thing to feel an attraction
When at best I would be just a distraction

Dear sir or madam

Please could you come to the school with your Adam.
He was sat at the back of the class, showing his things to a young lass. Adam then put his hand in his pocket and pulled out unbelievable sized rocket.
Now I do have say, it shouldn’t really have been on display. It’s not that it’s a problem, well at least not to the thinking of myself and Miss Joplin but you can’t imagine our surprise. We could hardly believe our eyes, how did he fit it all in? He’s so small and so thin!
Now Adam reports that his father’s is much bigger and he polishes it with lot of vigour.
So Miss Joplin and I were wondering if Adams father happened to pass by, would he be able to drop in and show us this thing.
Both Miss Joplin and I, have both tried to buy, but to no avail, really by the end we were both quite pale.
Now to have two so vast, now that would make an impression that would last. To be able to see them up close, that really would be just the most.
We are willing to give a hand, if there’s anything we can do, please don’t hesitate; we are willing to help them stand up straight.
Oh where are my manners? My head has turned to a bag of spanners.
Please, Adams mother is also cordially invited, here at school we are all really quite excited. I am sure she would relish with glee, the sight we all hope to see. What a wonderful display, I am sure it would make our day.

Yours Faithfully
Miss Waverley

P.S Science fair starts at 2 and we really hope to see you, the children would be so pleased.

I was contemplating my navel with all the power I saw able
Why is it in the middle of my stomach? To this I am quite flummoxed
Why does mine seem to go in? Is it because I am so thin?
I know of some that stick out, pregnant women this they seem to flout
Who came up with its design? It has puzzled me for some time
Why isn’t under my hair? No one would see it there
If I cut my skin the healing will begin and then in time, no more sign
So why does this bloody thing sit on my stomach with a grin
The answers to this and much more, I am attempting to explore
If you can answer these questions please do,
I would to know what it is for and what does it do?