I just came back here to see what's up and say happy holiday to somme friends.
But I was surprised to see a mail from a guy I used to chat with from here, I oppened his mail and I paused with a big question mark on my head.
He was saying hi and he wanted to get to know me better.
I was like whatta f*ck ? He gotta be kidding me, we chat for quite a long time and intensive how did he forget?
On the other hand, the minute I saw his pic I remembered him ..
Anyways the moral story here is not how he doesn't seem to remember me LOLZ it is the queion of how people forget easily.
Which for some ocassion it is a good thing to forget but when you say love , will you easily forget that ?
Finding a partner , a spouse, may seemed not important for some of you. Its no more different than hooking up and get laid.
But not for me. I take these stuff seriouslly. I don't just say love and forget.
So please people if you wanna play arround, it really is okay. But try to play it nice as in a way that we respect who ever interacting with us.
But I am not here to be all bitter LOLZ, I am here to wish you all a very happy holiday season.
With warn wishes to all.
Love and light
Sometimes it does feel good to be mean. Lolz
especially to those who have treated me very very bad.
I know i know im sooo bad , i might even be removed from Santa's xmas gift list this year.. Lolz
but i just cant help it, it feels really really good !
Knowin' when i kicked their as*es, i kicked em' hard !!!
he asked me to put up a blog about him, and i do not see the reason not to.
He's a great buddy of mine, we met here,on CS 2years back, we fall in love on the net and we have our arguments and we kindda fall out of love,then a girl from my county STOLE him away ( yea i choose the word stole because when i tried to fix things up with him, she already with him )
but when he was with her and i also carried on with someone else we remain our friendship.
So i know for sure, how he reacted towards other girl when he was in a relationship with her, and vice versa with him, he knew everything that happen with me and my family.
The point is, he's a nice guy, and his family is great. I loved them! His mom and dad, his brother ... They're really a warm and nice family!
But who knows what was the plan behind everything that happen in our life, when he visit my country, his ex broke up with him and the same thing happened with me, i broke up with someone too, it takes 2months to actually talk and decided if we really really want this, for us to continue what we left behind ...
But its better that way, we have to be sure were we are going and how we are going to get there.
I know that he is still hurt by her, and i have given him the time and the chance to figure things out, what he really wanted.
And he also let me have my space and my own life, hes not demanding to be in every status i made of facebook, or to chat with him every time, the fact is we were both bussy with our job, so we dont actually have the time to be online ... But we do text, and called, and trying to keep in touch as much as we can.
But I am not saying that i have a relationship with him,yet ...
we are still trying to make it but first we know we have to make our communication works.
Its not hard, i think, because we are at the same age, so we like the same things, the same bands,music, movies,and the fact that ... I felt so comfortable with him,it made things much easier for me.
I dont get jealous when he talks about his ex and i dont mind him making friends with dozen other girls in his face book ...
I actually trust him !
And I think that is the best feeling i expirience so far in my love life ...
But im not gonna make a head start in declaring that i am in a relationship which not yet have been made..
But i really dont mind saying this ...
I AM IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND ... !!!
Hopefully its not bad luck to speak of it so early ... But im sure, if its meant to be, its meant to be !
The word surrogate-mother is getting more and more popular nowadays.
Earlier to day, i read that Chris Dougherty is expecting a child from a surrogate mother ...
To think of it, this concept can be a blessings
but it can also be a curse
All those loving parents who have difficulties in having babies have just the perfect solution.
It is an expenssive solution, but it will do.
But, if it is put in the hands of wicked people, how do you think this surrogate concept will benefit them?
I mean, it is like we are making our own human yes?
Bringing a life into this world without having to involved love and most of all responsibillities
Everything is very easy
All you have to do is walk in to a sperm bank
and take 15mins to choose from their catalogue
and paid the money
and boom ...
the next 9months u have ur self a baby
and everybody is happy!
But i am an old fashion woman, i brought to this world from my parents love, and sin and the need to make a family ...
So i do not think that this concept works for me
and imagine this,
you choose a strong,focus and sadistic male and female, and have them concieved and after 9months you have a baby soldier to be the delta force team,or even a general in the army ...
you choose a preety boy and a preety girl and you have the next hollywood movie star or the next Milan hot runway babe ..
You could even made, spies, presidents even porn stars ...
If you have read about the monarch program and the works of devils workers who has done this concepts from the time of Hittler up until now, i am sure you will get what i mean.
One last tought, why don't people just adopt children from the orphanage?
Isn't it silly, if people prefer to adopt a puppy instead?
Yes, i hate him sooo much that i am going crazy. I started to write my personal stuff in here which are rubbish.
That is why i deleted my previous blog, im goin unethical, i am acting crazy, i should have not done that and i am very sorry!
I can not helped it. I am a woman, women sometimes think with their heart not with their logic. And if the heart is hurt, it is hard to keep an open mind.
I think i needed a break to heal.
Im not a god, i am just a humble human being. I am just a woman from indonesia, sometimes im foolish and goofy
, but i do have a heart and feelings!.
And i do not think i need to proof my self to anybody here, of who is right and who is wrong, no body will even care. You can categorized this blog and me as an attention seeker and its okay.
Its a free site, you can be anybody, you can do anything you want. Let the truth be out there, remain unfolded if it is necessary.
But what i do need is, i need to keep my feelings secure, i need to keep my life and my bank account a balance and i need to keep on writting,because i love writting, its my passion. But there will be no more rubbish from now on.
Thank you for all the supports.
A very good day to all.
in another country, does it means that the woman owes that man the trip he pays to visits her? Just because he visited her?
and if things sadly didnt work out the way its expected too, would that man have the right to blame it on the woman?
Is the woman are put in such a low and degrading level and have no option to say no and no right to determine whether its him or not that she wanted just because he visits her?
I mean, seriously this is an international site, a trip must be made sometimes, at the agreement of both parties, but on the above case does it mean that its final and the woman should say yes to who ever he is?
I dont think so, regardless what ever reason the woman might have, i mean, she must have the INVINITIVE reason for her decission , would she?
Should the woman be blamed if she says no? Does she actually owes him a favour yet she receives nothing and ask for no benefits from that man as in lets say cash and gifts.
What do you guys think?
Please give me answers for this matters regardless the races and origins cause its driving me crazy.
i was putting a status on one of my social site account, i wrote a question ' WHY MEN NEVER GROW UP ?? ' and then in just the counts of minutes, got many comments from women that says ... " NAY, MEN NEVER GROW UP, AND NOT SOME OF THEM BUT ALL OF THEM " ...
And these women, who came from differrent countries, are so sure about this, that this one guy,the only guy in there, a good friend stopped commenting after 2 comments. Yes, he was beaten down, he ran out for words to justify than the matureness in a man do exist.
Anyway, another interesting fact, the first comment was made by a psycho analysis, a woman from washington, she said that this question was just brought up to her in her home page.
The question was
" WHY PSCHO ANALYSIS WORKS A LOT QUICKER FOR MEN THAN FOR WOMEN ? "
And her answer was, when its time to go back to a man's childhood, he was there already ... Xoxo.
Lmao.
Its my pleasure to share this with you guys ... Lol lol
for me, men who dare to intimidate women who are physically weaker than them are the lowest class of male.
Like how ahmadinejad respons to the recent raped case of a woman in iran he even called the wife of Sarkozy, french president, mrs Carla Burni a whore for deffending that poor iranian woman.
I cursed violence and i condemned violence againts women.
Why there are men who willingly to show the beast in them to be pround of their devilisly doings.
Does that make them feel powerful? What ever the reason, i stand against any violance in words and doing towards women. Even the slightest harrashment counts!
Do you wanna know why my cs friends? Because i was once there ....
Dont just be a gentleman which speaks soft words, earned it with doings !
We focus so much on our differences which was all man made,that we forgot we all derrives as the same human being,flesh and blood.
We also forgot that what we all have in common that we all believe in something that we think its right.
And we all trying to find what we think is right for us, because whether we realize it or not,our spirits bow before life.
And in the outcome, we felt that we owe it so much to our selves and that we have traveled so far, to find what is right for us.
And that rightness is life.
We human whether we realize it or not, we respect life as the higher deeds,in our own different ways,perspective and understanding.
So we search and we search who we are.
We search what is right for us.
We search for our happiness.
We even search for our sorrows
It is our human instinct
We all search what we use to have, what we used to recognize and what we used to hold on too.
But now it is lost and we search because we long for it to return.
And that thing we missed is the righteous life.
If we respect our life that much than why should we even look at the differences?
We are a lost soul, we have these abstract ways to define what is righteous in live is not because we are different. It is because we are blinded.
Other human,our brothers and sisters are our only way to find what we long have lost.
Together we can achieved the big picture of a puzzle, which each and every one of us is the pieces of that puzzles.
Because that thing we search do exist somewhere but alone we dont know where and how to find it.
Some called it heaven, some called it life,some called it faith, some called it mother nature, some called it lucifer, some called it hell,some called it destiny, some called it unconditional love, some called it light,some called it humanity ...
Its just 101 ways we all wished to describe what we all been looking for.
Beats me, i havent found it either, but i do know that it existed.
And i called it hope...
Why do irony and sarcasm is such enjoyable these days?
Not just here, its everywhere.
Its like no one is ever satisfied of anything.
Everybody kept complaining,complaining and complaining and that their criticsm became so loose and absurd . And everybody is becoming such a snob by putting a very high standard to apply to others without even measuring their own capacity and quality.
Me my self im a fan of irony, and i do love complain.
I complain about my food in the restaurants, i complain about the prices i have to pay, i complain about how my son's school should have more concerns on it's student, i complain about the man im seeing, i complain so many times that i have been turning into a living monster ...
Is this a shift ? An evolution in the way of thinking?
I mean i can't be like this, i have to change, i have becoming this ignorant and rude character that i dont like but i can't help it.
I start to enjoy it so much, it gives me the creeps.
What is a relationship really?
Is it just an interaction between two people with all the rules, the yes and no, the can and can't that follows ?
Or is it a feeling, a feeling of belonging, regardless of the rules, distance, spaces and characters in between?
A relation as a sense of belonging is so natural, it needed no complicated rules.
Just many of willingly given understanding from both side.
When you come home after a long day at work, after life has been harsh on us, after a long boring parents meeting, after a nice dinner with families, after a long happy shopping with friends or after a girls night out, what is it exactly that we expected to find??
What is it exactly that we are looking for?
Many long to find a lover, a friend, a spouse, a protector, a family when they get home.
But others, they want to find a home to their heart.
A home to connect and shielded the love from the world outside, a home to share and to feel but most of all a home for the heart to grow together.
But you see, many people mistaken love with interest,lust and desire.
They build rules to guard and protected their homes.
So that no one could escape or come in and steal what institutionally belongs to them.
But relationship is not a cage for the heart
Love needs no boundary, no rules...
BECAUSE LOVE IS THE RULES...
And the intitution and status that follows are the casing,a system that made with rules, which we could switch and customize according to the love and not the other way arround.
One can be married their whole life but never felt the love
but many that stands outside the relationship finds rainbow in their sky...
All im saying is a relationship should be felt not kept, should be build not guard ...
It is a natural giving feeling that it should be stress free...
Love is the real gift of life.
Do you prefer knowing the truth and all that follows,
even if it is a painful truth ,that will only burnt your anger and drained your strength from hurtfull emotions?
And then, you probably talk about it or not talk about it, or make a decision ... It depends ....
Or, do yo prefer not knowing? Not trying to found out,
pretended like nothing happen and just carry on with your life, for what you did not know can not hurt you.
And hoping that everything will come back to normal ...
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