Quotations

¦Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure. ~Murphy's Law
¦The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. ~Erma Bombeck
¦No one is listening until you fart. ~Author Unknown
¦If there is something you must do and you cannot do it, you cannot do anything else.
¦How is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?
¦As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. ~Author Unknown
¦A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist.
¦Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.
¦Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. ~Will Rogers
¦When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time. ~Author Unknown
¦How is it that one match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box of matches to start a campfire?
¦The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance. ~Author Unknown
¦People who snore always fall asleep first. ~Author Unknown
¦The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. ~Author Unknown
¦Warranty – A notice telling the buyer when the product that was just purchased will no longer function.
¦Self-Checkout Line – The place where customers of an establishment become unpaid employees of the establishment.