Five Love Languages

I spent most of the day yesterday in the company of women who like me are waiting for the rain to come. It's very dry where we are at the moment...somehow along the line the geographical drought translated
to emotional drought....we ended up talking about Dr Gary Chapman's "The Five Love Languages"...

In my previous marriage I was accused by my ex of being ungrateful because I did not appreciate enough the material things he lavished me. Though I was grateful and felt very lucky to have been recipient
of nice things; it did not quench the drought in my heart...

As a young girl, my mother and I were left by my father for many years,
As a grown up, I was denied my dreams to repay my grandma's contributions in my life because death got to her before me. I could have realized the dream with her but I dilly-dallied...hence I now live with the guilt from failing to give her my time. I suppose these are the reasons I long more for quality time and acts of service now.

I guess in my past marriage I was looking for quality time and acts of service, he was expressing his love in giving gifts. Eventually I left not because I no longer loved him; I left because I didn't feel loved by him although he said he did. I understand now one of the reasons
I left was because he thought what I needed was not important and he chose not to meet my deepest need in a way that speaks to me; or rather he tried to meet my needs in his own language...yet in my heart failed to fill the deep void in my life, in a way that quenched the emotional thirst I felt inside....