THE SLUGGING THREAD .... (61)
FM, brilliant piece!!...
Fallingman: Alas Florida has been hit by a hurricane and her condo has been splintered before she even had time to buy insurance from the Gulf guy (second job) and her billions were invested with Bernie Madoff so that's not going to buy her a glass of milk for her Ulcer. Her ulcer is in capitals coz it's caused by listening to the bad puns of the dashing Irishman in Fat Harry's. He's not chained to the bar as he arrived late for the chaining (but hopefully in time for the whipping) and while mildly inebriated he had sufficient nous to rescue the painting from its temporary home in Sothebys weekly clean-out sale. The painting now worth 5 euros again has moved Fat Harry to tears. It now hangs behind the bar in return for a round of drinks for all and a de-chaining of the company. Released and maudlin they are dancing tangos in variegated couples across the floor of the taverna.
Sommerauer71:
'Jan, get the woman a drink, after three she'll have forgotten all about it' Shouts Crazy artist. Sommer is having a cigarette, looking upon this exchange of words and she catches Crazy artists attention, she indicates the cellar door, he catches on and she makes excuses to Dashingly Handsome Irishman, 'I'll be back, don't go away' she whispers into his ear.
They enter the cellar door and....
'Jan, get the woman a drink, after three she'll have forgotten all about it' Shouts Crazy artist. Sommer is having a cigarette, looking upon this exchange of words and she catches Crazy artists attention, she indicates the cellar door, he catches on and she makes excuses to Dashingly Handsome Irishman, 'I'll be back, don't go away' she whispers into his ear.
They enter the cellar door and....
discover to their horror that the combination of alcohol, steep cellar ladders and no light is a painful one. Waking up after a while, still slightly stunned by the fall, they realise they are not alone.
"Conrad" whispers Sommer in some alarm "I thought you were in hospital". "Unnnnhh" mumbles the baldy artist coot. "Atlas shrugged and the health service realised it was part of a socialist conspiracy and disestablished itself so we are back to sawbones in poorly lit rooms, leeching and cupping and all sorts of torture calling itself medicine,." says Conrad looking a mite scared. "I repent and will henceforth be a Socialist" he shouted. At this Doctor Dude emerges from another part of the cellar and says "never fear, Obama is here and will fix you up"
At this point Sommer realises it is all a dream. Back at the bar the Irishman is having a second glass, the ice is melting in her gin and the Bald artist is trying to repair the damage done to the picture by the crazy mother person. The clock ticks and the spiders are now the only ones tangoing.
Then the door opens......
Ye Gads .. I leave you all alone here for a day - and you all go completely bonkers?!Wonderful riveting story by the way... very good... very very good!
I found a good theatre today for this production, the only problemo is its been condemned by the Fire Chief, and the roof leaks, the carpets he says are highly flammable being just over 400 years old, and there are no fire escapes or alternate forms of escape for the 200 people we could have crammed into the hall, the electricity is also condemned, and the stage curtains refuse to move open or closed - otherwise it`s absolutely perfect.
smoky: Ye Gads .. I leave you all alone here for a day - and you all go completely bonkers?!
Wonderful riveting story by the way... very good... very very good!
I found a good theatre today for this production, the only problemo is its been condemned by the Fire Chief, and the roof leaks, the carpets he says are highly flammable being just over 400 years old, and there are no fire escapes or alternate forms of escape for the 200 people we could have crammed into the hall, the electricity is also condemned, and the stage curtains refuse to move open or closed - otherwise it`s absolutely perfect.
I wont notice, I am always drunk. As producer, how have we done today? In your view. Some good material there.Wonderful riveting story by the way... very good... very very good!
I found a good theatre today for this production, the only problemo is its been condemned by the Fire Chief, and the roof leaks, the carpets he says are highly flammable being just over 400 years old, and there are no fire escapes or alternate forms of escape for the 200 people we could have crammed into the hall, the electricity is also condemned, and the stage curtains refuse to move open or closed - otherwise it`s absolutely perfect.
We'll get it going again, Robert...
I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
LMAO simply.... Al'o Al'o - Lizen verri carfeul, I tell diz eunly ounze
Theu peaze geut to be frresch orr ve vill hand it oever to de sicreet arrmy.Or as the Swedish cook used to say - first we haf to catch the chiiicken
Swedish chef, classic and genius comedy...
Sommerauer71: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbs64GvGgPU Swedish chef, classic and genius comedy...
I tried to find the chicken scene, it is just too funny..
mike69spain: I tried to find the chicken scene, it is just too funny..
I'll have a look too. How the American#s viewed the Swedes, is just hilarious.
I am wetting myself now...
Sommerauer71: We'll get it going again, Robert...
I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
You swine!
Sommerauer71: I wont notice, I am always drunk. As producer, how have we done today? In your view. Some good material there.
Well, I think I`ve found the Title and Theme music for our musical ..........? Now, I just got to send a litle note to Elton John to ask if he`d Open the Show, be the Main Guest ... ya know ... the Premier thing all great theatre productions have?
Sommerauer71: We'll get it going again, Robert...
I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
Ahem, Sommergirl ...... Is that a typing error...?.... or WHAT is it you are doing...with another of our friends in hospital....?I am busy woring on another one, 'ANOTHER OF OUR FRIENDS IS IN HOSPITAL'
could you use this?
or this
or this
smoky: Well, I think I`ve found the Title and Theme music for our musical ..........? Now, I just got to send a litle note to Elton John to ask if he`d Open the Show, be the Main Guest ... ya know ... the Premier thing all great theatre productions have?
wooffy: could you use this?
or this
or this
Ah yes ... Joe Cockers song and singing is much more Zany for our production!... more MAD like.... I just liked the title of the Elton song ........ maybe a small guest appearance by Elton somewhere?
or a 
or kir royale creme de cassis thingyies (now that I can make it better make a few of em to get it into memory)
smoky: Ye Gads .. I leave you all alone here for a day - and you all go completely bonkers?!
Wonderful riveting story by the way... very good... very very good!
I found a good theatre today for this production, the only problemo is its been condemned by the Fire Chief, and the roof leaks, the carpets he says are highly flammable being just over 400 years old, and there are no fire escapes or alternate forms of escape for the 200 people we could have crammed into the hall, the electricity is also condemned, and the stage curtains refuse to move open or closed - otherwise it`s absolutely perfect.
Wonderful riveting story by the way... very good... very very good!
I found a good theatre today for this production, the only problemo is its been condemned by the Fire Chief, and the roof leaks, the carpets he says are highly flammable being just over 400 years old, and there are no fire escapes or alternate forms of escape for the 200 people we could have crammed into the hall, the electricity is also condemned, and the stage curtains refuse to move open or closed - otherwise it`s absolutely perfect.
Looks like I have my work cut out for me....hopefully it doesn't take as long as my house.
I'll need a personal assistant, and I happen to have someone in mind too. She'd be perfect for this sort of project, good with number crunching, cost estimates, procuring materials and other details.
No peeking behind the curtains until the place is done...and it may take a while.
smoky: Ahem, Sommergirl ...... Is that a typing error...?.... or WHAT is it you are doing...with another of our friends in hospital....?
Ooooops... Well, I am the drunk one you know...
More Threads
Nature
Reality Check
rarotonga
Common Issues with the BMW X1
How far is too far?
everything is changing
Icebergs Still Around
1830's Music
Salami, Salami, Baloney
Don Shits-In-Pants!!!
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
Enter stage left a dashing Irishman