Marriage and Relationships (100)
invinciblemuse: I'm in total agreement with you here. Marriage should not be taken lightly, and getting to know the person first, before getting hitched (if at all), is just common sense.
I believe you can't know someone well enough after a few dates to make such a major decision. In fact, a guy, who proposes after knowing me for less than a month, kinda freaks me out cos it makes me wonder why he's in such a hurry to tie me down.
I believe you can't know someone well enough after a few dates to make such a major decision. In fact, a guy, who proposes after knowing me for less than a month, kinda freaks me out cos it makes me wonder why he's in such a hurry to tie me down.
A whole month eh? Look if tying down's your thing - it's not mine but I live on a boat and have hanks of rope in abundance and am good at knotty things and if tying down rocks your boat, come and rock mine, except there wouldn't be much rocking, would there if you were trussed up like a kipper
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leostartingover: Well that sounds like fun! It isn't quite 3pm here and a public holiday (Heritage Day). Going to join a couple of my friends later for sundowners - actually the one who invited us has a jacuzzi AND some left over French champagne from her recent 50th!! Should be a fun evening!
Good one! you just beat my enthusiasm for an otherwise fun evening with the mention of jacuzzi 
i want that too
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nanners2863: I understand you're lack of understanding..do you understand?
besides that yall are psycho... no ... not really !!!!!
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invinciblemuse: I'm in total agreement with you here. Marriage should not be taken lightly, and getting to know the person first, before getting hitched (if at all), is just common sense.
I believe you can't know someone well enough after a few dates to make such a major decision. In fact, a guy, who proposes after knowing me for less than a month, kinda freaks me out cos it makes me wonder why he's in such a hurry to tie me down.
I believe you can't know someone well enough after a few dates to make such a major decision. In fact, a guy, who proposes after knowing me for less than a month, kinda freaks me out cos it makes me wonder why he's in such a hurry to tie me down.
i'd say at least 5 years.... and cohabitation is a must for at least 2 of those years.....
only then can i say that i "somewhat" know someone !!!!!
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Veritaas: Never been married and sure do not intend to take this route to sign and seal a relationship.
What has the law ultimately got to do with how you feel about someone?
What has the law ultimately got to do with how you feel about someone?
The law has nothing to do about how you feel about someone (except maybe if they stole your car or similar). Marriage though tells the world that you have made a long-term commitment to each other, which excludes all others and which you plan to keep 'In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer'. That's the theory anyway.
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Veritaas: Never been married and sure do not intend to take this route to sign and seal a relationship.
What has the law ultimately got to do with how you feel about someone?
What has the law ultimately got to do with how you feel about someone?
you aint missing much !!!!
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MetalMilitia: well... more power to you....again... its not something that i can understand at the moment....as i've said in the past... im NEVER getting married again.... and if by some miracle i happen to change my mind... my friends have strict instructions to put two in the chest and one in the head !!!!!
Life is for the living. I won't view my failures as failures but as learning experiences. I won't fear hurt, rejection, or embarassment..I embrace them for they mean I'm alive and living. I will jump off any cliff, I will grab any opportunity and explore any new adventure. I won't sit in my home, old and alone, regretting the things I never tried. I refuse to take myself so seriously that I miss out on the fun and wonderful things. I refuse to hide behind past hurts.------ This thread is Archived ------
Scubadiva: Absolutely. I have NO desire, whatsoever, to remarry. One marriage (good one) was enough. I see no reason to remarry, especially when there are no joint children involved. I suppose if people from different countries marry to allow one or the other partner to move, then okay... but beyond that? No way, Jose.
... oh... and if a rooster mentions marriage ever, I'm out.
... oh... and if a rooster mentions marriage ever, I'm out.
right on sista.....
just one thing tho....
my name IS NOT jose !!!!
just saying .....
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ChasingCars: A whole month eh? Look if tying down's your thing - it's not mine but I live on a boat and have hanks of rope in abundance and am good at knotty things and if tying down rocks your boat, come and rock mine, except there wouldn't be much rocking, would there if you were trussed up like a kipper
You naughty boy!!!
Anyway - send me a picture of the boat and I promise to think about your proposal.
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nanners2863: Life is for the living. I won't view my failures as failures but as learning experiences. I won't fear hurt, rejection, or embarassment..I embrace them for they mean I'm alive and living. I will jump off any cliff, I will grab any opportunity and explore any new adventure. I won't sit in my home, old and alone, regretting the things I never tried. I refuse to take myself so seriously that I miss out on the fun and wonderful things. I refuse to hide behind past hurts.
hey... me neither... except for maybe the jumping of a cliff things..... that just sounds like something you'll only do ONCE !!!!
kinda the way i see the whola marriage thing come to think of it !!!!
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MetalMilitia: hey... me neither... except for maybe the jumping of a cliff things..... that just sounds like something you'll only do ONCE !!!! kinda the way i see the whola marriage thing come to think of it !!!!
If you view marriage or relationships as something that imprisons you..then that's exactly what you will get because you start with that mind set. Past marriages/relationships (yours or your friends) should be exactly that..the past. Learn from them and leave them behind you.------ This thread is Archived ------
ChasingCars: The law has nothing to do about how you feel about someone (except maybe if they stole your car or similar). Marriage though tells the world that you have made a long-term commitment to each other, which excludes all others and which you plan to keep 'In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer'. That's the theory anyway.
I agree. Bill and I are choosing an non-traditional route. We are vowing our commitment to each other and exchanging rings. There is no piece of paper, no government..just us stating our commitment to each other.------ This thread is Archived ------
I married young, we had two childern together, I left and filed for divorce 18 1/2 years later. We are still good friends and she done one hell of a job raising those 2 boy's.
I then found another woman after a 2 year search, we lived together for 15 1/2 years, we never married, we are friends.
I am not sure if I will ever marry again. A piece of paper, so the goverment can tax us. It will take a special lady to get me to the altar again. The second women in my life never once mentioned getting hitched.
I then found another woman after a 2 year search, we lived together for 15 1/2 years, we never married, we are friends.
I am not sure if I will ever marry again. A piece of paper, so the goverment can tax us. It will take a special lady to get me to the altar again. The second women in my life never once mentioned getting hitched.
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MetalMilitia: Im starting to think im rather unique up in here.... so i know 3 dudes in particular who have been married, had kids and been subsequently divorced....
one of them remained single for about a year, then found a chick and is now engaged... he is (in my view) the smartest one as he is actually taking his time and ensuring he dont marry another member of the Evil Empire... but the other two...
well.. one is going for wife #3 and the other is already working on #5... its like they are having a competition or something... i've known them for about 10 years now and in that time, i'd be surprised if they have a combined 1 year of single status
and thats just the dudes.... i know women that were remarried just months after a divorce !!!
... and then there are those in here who are proud to tell us all that they traveled, they met, they copulated and now they are getting hitched !!!
then you read the forums and online profiles and all you see is... "im looking for the man/woman of my dreams" "im ready for a long lasting relationship" "i want a husband/wife" .... blah blah blah....are yall really THAT hard up for company???? am i the only one that reads that and thinks CODEPENDENT????? What ever happened to going out having fun and letting things SLOWLY run their course????im sorry, but i just see that as a sign of desperation... and i dont do desperate... i guess that's why i cant see online dating ever working for me.... if a chick mentions marriage within the first 2 years of dating IM OUT !!!
more importantly, is there ANYONE there who would not be opposed to just being in a relationship with someone (permanently) with no marriage intentions?????
one of them remained single for about a year, then found a chick and is now engaged... he is (in my view) the smartest one as he is actually taking his time and ensuring he dont marry another member of the Evil Empire... but the other two...
well.. one is going for wife #3 and the other is already working on #5... its like they are having a competition or something... i've known them for about 10 years now and in that time, i'd be surprised if they have a combined 1 year of single status
and thats just the dudes.... i know women that were remarried just months after a divorce !!!
... and then there are those in here who are proud to tell us all that they traveled, they met, they copulated and now they are getting hitched !!!
then you read the forums and online profiles and all you see is... "im looking for the man/woman of my dreams" "im ready for a long lasting relationship" "i want a husband/wife" .... blah blah blah....are yall really THAT hard up for company???? am i the only one that reads that and thinks CODEPENDENT????? What ever happened to going out having fun and letting things SLOWLY run their course????im sorry, but i just see that as a sign of desperation... and i dont do desperate... i guess that's why i cant see online dating ever working for me.... if a chick mentions marriage within the first 2 years of dating IM OUT !!!
more importantly, is there ANYONE there who would not be opposed to just being in a relationship with someone (permanently) with no marriage intentions?????
Word...
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I think marriage is an institution which some people rush to without recognizing it has ups and downs.We tend to focus on sweetness of marriage and ignore that in the same , there will be disagreements, different opinions e.t.c when these happens, this is where the two thinks individually selfishly or collectively about the institution.Running away because 'he or she is not upto my expection' is the worst thing ever to happen in marriage.Note that am not trying to say you should cling to it even when your partner is abusive pschologically or physically.
Sorry guys , i have a problem in living with someone permanently without marriage.If i do , i will be running away from commitments.So the intention here is to get conjugal rights, but when there is a problem ,he/she will disappears.So why runaway from problems instead of confronting them?
Marriage is an institution which gives a sense of belonging, mutual love and companionship but we should know there as challenges too.It is not a bed of roses
Sorry guys , i have a problem in living with someone permanently without marriage.If i do , i will be running away from commitments.So the intention here is to get conjugal rights, but when there is a problem ,he/she will disappears.So why runaway from problems instead of confronting them?
Marriage is an institution which gives a sense of belonging, mutual love and companionship but we should know there as challenges too.It is not a bed of roses
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I'm the farthest thing from codependant..I "left" my ex husband for good reasons and have had "several" men who I met since my divorce who said they wanted to marry me..I ended those relationships too..My reason being I would rather stay single than to live with "mr wrong"..I'm perfectly happy living by myself..I know how to cook anything from a egg to filet mignon..I'm living in a lakefront home in a expensive area, I have education and run a business..I dont need a man "but" if the right one after a sensible period of time has proved to me its worth the chance getting married..I would consider it..My dads parents had a sucessful happy marriage their whole life so I know its possible to have one..And neither of them were "codependant" .. Codependant means you "cant" ever live by yourself..My grandfather died and grandma never remarried but she had chances to..Yes even at her old ripe age she had chances. lol
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The decision you made was the best, and again you recognise the good life your ancestors had in marriage and yearns for the same.I think the biggest problem is how to get that Mr Right now and even in future.You could do it now and get one, or wait in future and get an idiot.You may have everything in this world but still it is a fact that you desire to have a partner
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Marriage is.....great and I hope to be again one day, maybe...
But until then I am finding that I like having me for a room mate. I cook, I clean, I don't have to share the remote, I can drink out of the jug (thats the milk jug I'm talking about), and I never find the toilet seat up.
That being said I miss making coffee for my man, telling him to "look in the drawer", thinking of something to do for him to make his day easier, and having a best friend other than myself around.
If you can't love and live with yourself first and foremost then you have no business being with anyone...ever.
But until then I am finding that I like having me for a room mate. I cook, I clean, I don't have to share the remote, I can drink out of the jug (thats the milk jug I'm talking about), and I never find the toilet seat up.
That being said I miss making coffee for my man, telling him to "look in the drawer", thinking of something to do for him to make his day easier, and having a best friend other than myself around.
If you can't love and live with yourself first and foremost then you have no business being with anyone...ever.
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one of them remained single for about a year, then found a chick and is now engaged... he is (in my view) the smartest one as he is actually taking his time and ensuring he dont marry another member of the Evil Empire... but the other two...
well.. one is going for wife #3 and the other is already working on #5... its like they are having a competition or something... i've known them for about 10 years now and in that time, i'd be surprised if they have a combined 1 year of single status
and thats just the dudes.... i know women that were remarried just months after a divorce !!!
... and then there are those in here who are proud to tell us all that they traveled, they met, they copulated and now they are getting hitched !!!
then you read the forums and online profiles and all you see is... "im looking for the man/woman of my dreams" "im ready for a long lasting relationship" "i want a husband/wife" .... blah blah blah....are yall really THAT hard up for company???? am i the only one that reads that and thinks CODEPENDENT????? What ever happened to going out having fun and letting things SLOWLY run their course????im sorry, but i just see that as a sign of desperation... and i dont do desperate... i guess that's why i cant see online dating ever working for me.... if a chick mentions marriage within the first 2 years of dating IM OUT !!!
more importantly, is there ANYONE there who would not be opposed to just being in a relationship with someone (permanently) with no marriage intentions?????