Do you feel sorry for ( Archived) (48)

Most people dont cheat immediately not do they usually go into a marriage with the intention of cheating. It generally takes years of two people drifting apart. One will generally recognize there are problems and try to talk about it. Quite often the other no longer cares. I think its odd that one partner stays in love and the other no longer does.
I think my point is: cheating, while not a desirable way to end a marriage has many causes and reasons behind it. The cheater commonly is lonely, feels unwanted and unloved. I think its incredible that the other person in the relationship will scream long and loud when they find out, but would not talk about their problems in the first place.
Cheating hurts, plain and simple but, wonderful lessons can be learned from it as well.

Im sorry for what you went through. I know its hard. Been there and done that myself. A husband and wife living in two different Countries would be extremely hard to manage. Perhaps he couldnt hold his feelings for you close to his heart because he was basically living life as a single man. There is a saying: Absence makes the heart grow fonder or absence makes the heart go wander. JMO

What happened to trust?

his heart wandered - living the life of a single man, different cultures, easy women, alcohol, as I once said to friends - he did what wanted, when he wanted how he wanted and he had no one to answer too - but did we talk yes - but at the end of the day - loved died, so did trust, each of us didn't have our needs met - but to quote another from earlier thread - it takes 2 - (my hurt is only fresh - 6 months so as I said I am still pretty raw - married for 20+ years)
thank god for CS

I bet you will meet a good guy (tall) all the best!!
;-}

Hi

I do feel sorry for people who have been screwed around on but

I do feel that we are responsible to on one else for our decisions. We made the decision to be their partner. I think some responsibility has to lie with ourselves for this decision but I guess some people prefer to be a victim instead of taking responsibility for their own actions.

Not meant to hurt anyone..........Just my opinion.

I feel sorry for men who lost faith in women..

No you didnt deserve what you got, if thier were problems in your relationship partly due to your lack of pleasing him he should have told you not go and fool around...thier is no excuse for cheating in my mind if you are not happy in a relationship and find yourself attracted to another you should leave that relationship before getting involved with anyone else. Cheating is just wrong no matter what the curcumstances are. jmo

Usually of someone else.

of course,i feel sorry for people getting hurt by someone they've trusted.on the other hand,no sympathy for people,who never try to consider that they might have done something wrong too and blame everyone else for their own acts.