Do you feel sorry for (48)
cherrybrandy: its more important if you are over it lady and enjoying your OWN life and men..
cheating is ugly,i would never argue that..
but,sorry to say that,sounds like your ex husband and ex girlfriend have found something together..not an excuse for cheating,of course..
im pretty sure,i ve been cheated on to,just by the time i found out i didnt really care..
cheating is ugly,i would never argue that..
but,sorry to say that,sounds like your ex husband and ex girlfriend have found something together..not an excuse for cheating,of course..
im pretty sure,i ve been cheated on to,just by the time i found out i didnt really care..
Totally over it...and a better person for the experience....Can't say I am happy for them, just indifferent!
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I feel sorry for my fingers and their struggle to keep up with my mind 
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leigh2154: Totally over it...and a better person for the experience....Can't say I am happy for them, just indifferent!
happy would be pushing it------ This thread is Archived ------
I think every situation is different. No matter who's responsible for what part in the relationship being cheated on hurts. I empathize for anyone who's trust was broken.
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nanners2863: I think every situation is different. No matter who's responsible for what part in the relationship being cheated on hurts. I empathize for anyone who's trust was broken.
Hey Nan....you bet sugar!!
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whowhatwherewhen: people who have been screwed around on by their husband/wife? Or have these people played a part in their own demise?
I have learned something in the last few years ...
"Feeling sorry for"
- is patronising by the person doing it (it implies the person you're being sorry for doesn't have what it takes to emotionally manage it, heal themselves and move on.
and
- dis-empowering to the person at the receiving end of someone feeling sorry for them. It puts them in the victim role.
"Feeling sorry for" is patronising and steals away another's power to feed the ego of the one who's doing the "feeling sorry for"
Feeling empathy for someone who is living a difficult moment on the other end, supports and re-inforces their strengths as well as the empathiser.
IMO
So no!! I don't do "feeling sorry for" anymore!!! But if they need me to hold their hand while they work on their emotions and healing, I would!!
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I feel sorry for the women that have been out with me.
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whowhatwherewhen: people who have been screwed around on by their husband/wife? Or have these people played a part in their own demise?
I have never thought about it. I for one would of wondered why anyone felt sorry for me after the run of bad luck he had shortly after that 
So 
I called a few friends to see how they felt about it. Two wanted to know if I was drinking
One said it was the best thing that ever happened to him. He is free now and him and his childrens home is a lot more peacefull. And my exes new wife hung up on me
So I don't know if people really feel like they are a victim and in need of me to feel sorry for them. It will be interesting to continue to see how others feel about this.------ This thread is Archived ------
whowhatwherewhen: people who have been screwed around on by their husband/wife? Or have these people played a part in their own demise?
There are, no doubt, those who (maybe unwittingly) contribute to whatever breaks down a relationship but there are also those who were not complicit. I think there's no rule of thumb, life is not black and white, nor are relationships. Each situation needs to be assessed on its own merits?
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time4fun4u: I feel sorry for the women that have been out with me.
I know exactly what you mean, all the ones that have dated me tell me that they'll never find anyone to remotely compare
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SUNSHINEB0Y: I know exactly what you mean, all the ones that have dated me tell me that they'll never find anyone to remotely compare
My dear sun if i lived in cork Ireland.. i would be with you all the time..------ This thread is Archived ------
whowhatwherewhen: people who have been screwed around on by their husband/wife? Or have these people played a part in their own demise?
if they stay with the person then no.
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time4fun4u: I feel sorry for the women that have been out with me.
hi.......T why ...?? has tiddy..winki...gone into hibination.........
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trueheart1941: hi.......T why ...?? has tiddy..winki...gone into hibination.........
hello true------ This thread is Archived ------
country_lady67: hello true
hello....C/L..... how yer doing ....??------ This thread is Archived ------
country_lady67: hello true
Hi CL...I saw your post in the blogs and I'm posting something to you. If it's too long I'll send you an email...
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islandgirl62: his heart wandered - living the life of a single man, different cultures, easy women, alcohol, as I once said to friends - he did what wanted, when he wanted how he wanted and he had no one to answer too - but did we talk yes - but at the end of the day - loved died, so did trust, each of us didn't have our needs met - but to quote another from earlier thread - it takes 2 - (my hurt is only fresh - 6 months so as I said I am still pretty raw - married for 20+ years)
thank god for CS
thank god for CS
yay for your Sweetie. continue to be strong and one day the hurt will be all gone and you will jump for joy at your freedom. Lots of love to you.
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vinny1967: Hi
I do feel sorry for people who have been screwed around on but
I do feel that we are responsible to on one else for our decisions. We made the decision to be their partner. I think some responsibility has to lie with ourselves for this decision but I guess some people prefer to be a victim instead of taking responsibility for their own actions.
Not meant to hurt anyone..........Just my opinion.
I do feel sorry for people who have been screwed around on but
I do feel that we are responsible to on one else for our decisions. We made the decision to be their partner. I think some responsibility has to lie with ourselves for this decision but I guess some people prefer to be a victim instead of taking responsibility for their own actions.
Not meant to hurt anyone..........Just my opinion.
You know - this may sound kind of corny but I recall hearing Marie Osmond say something about we enter relationships in the various states of self-esteem - in other words - if we feel badly about ourselves - we generally are more susceptible to entering a bad relationship where we allow people people to treat us badly. When we are in a strong place - we don't put up with the bad behavior. And, I kind of reluctantly read a piece of Dr. Phil's book on relationships which said that the strong lasting relationships are the ones where we refuse to compromise who we are...which I agree with. That is not to say that we aren't willing to compromise certain things - just not who we are!
Just some thoughts on that...NEVER thought I'd quote Marie Osmond...she's a little bit country and Donnie's a little bit rock and roll...or something like that...
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islandgirl62: having been on the receiving end of a cheating husband - no matter what the problem is in marriage/relationship - CHEATING is not going to fix it - and by the way - I stayed at home raised 4 kids, encouraged my other to follow his dreams to the point he moved to asia and lived there for some years - first I knew about my marriage was over was via a phone call from beijing airport ....
I done the soul searching, am I to blame, but at the end - well, he discovered that the grass is greener on the asian sands, and he no longer loved me....
(sorry but your comment touched a raw nerve...:)
I done the soul searching, am I to blame, but at the end - well, he discovered that the grass is greener on the asian sands, and he no longer loved me....
(sorry but your comment touched a raw nerve...:)
well I tend to think no. If someone cheats they are completely at fault for that behavior. One cannot blame someone else for their mistaken choices. If you choose to cheat - it is no one else's fault
and no, because 2 wrongs do not make a right. If you cheat, you do it because you chose to. period. If you are mad at a spouse there are other choices u can make. I've seen cheating spouses cheat on perfectly innocent and loving partners....so no
while sometimes it is possible to understand someone cheating on a particularly destructive partner, it is not that partner's responsibility/choice. we each must own our choices
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and everyone else,who has experienced the same...
that was not what i had in mind,maybe didnt formulate it good(apologies
my thought was more about people,who will keep rushing into relationships,not taking into consideration previous mystakes and experience,going for the ever wrong type of partner and behaviour..
for me is only natural,after a relationship has gone south to analyse over and over and find my own and his mistakes..