Getting over an ex... ( Archived) (28)

Ya personally I though that was proprietary.

I was going through the last threads I posted in. sorry.=o(
I don't sign in enough to catch up where I was...

Ya personally I though that was inappropriate.

proprietary.. Man that was funny.

I keep my distance because that usually means they`re not ready for another relationship and it could end it being a sad situation for both people............I refuse to go down that road of pain anymore.

yuh,

and since I have an ex...and, most people I know are dealing with some form of one... suppose this is the appropraite thread?
I don't come in here to be appropriate. I come in here as myself.

Hi baby girl. First of all Sheila, you do not try to convince them. The more you try, the more scared they become, or is that leary? You have to be patient, and give them the space that it takes to relax, and re-learn the trust that you so desire. This is a long time relationship that has to heal. So he may become whole in his thinking, and able to respond with an open mind and a cleansed heart. These things take time as we all know. One must have, and show, that time is available, in taking it one day at a time. One cannot hurry such things as affairs of the heart.
Kat

If you care about them then be a friend and no further. If you are trying to do more than help them get over an ex and trust you then you might be overloading yourself. I tried to help someone and then got emotionally involved. That was unprofessional of me and I felt that I needed help at that point. If they are unwilling to let it go then they are not ready no matter how much they want to be ready. Backing off would be the logical thing to do however I have found that relationships can defy logic. You might have to move on like they will have to move on if they ever become ready to move on. Ultmatums makes sense even though it may seem harsh but it might take something harsh to help them to move on. Sometimes one has no alternative but to give tough love. One can set one's self up for a fall. I am sure each case can be different and there might not be any right way to do it. I find it hard to be detached when I care about someone.