Helping the unhelpable (55)

Being a Baby Boomer, changes were happening nearly every day. All of a sudden we had rockin 'n rollin. Next thing was TV. And then came along Gidget and Frankie showing us how good the beach scene was. The Beatles went of on a Magical Mystery Tour and then we were hit by the Rolling Stones. Then I learnt about Puberty Blues (written about what we went through). May of stopped my run associated with the Angels (it was the Bandititos & co that led me to a different life).

It is our educators (our parents, our school teachers and our peers), who give us direction and let us make our choices. My parents gave me values, my teachers drummed in many things (including socialism) but it was my peers that I tried to emulate. But life lessons learnt along the way guide me.

Advise, whether right or wrong, is always given. It is the choice of the individual to accept it. But it is "I" who must take responsibility to accept that I have accepted that advice, whether it is right or wrong in the outcome.

As my mum said, "I have the smartest grandchildren on the planet as my children knew more than me and their children know more than them."

We go through life living in these changes I treasure the memories
Of that era,in country England we had small groups of bikie gangs from the villages all around there were no Wars between them just a bit of cheeky bantering when they met up in one of the Rock an Roll Cafes in every small town.

Now and then a group of London boys strutted through in their Italian suits and winkle pickers with the local boys muttering in the corner.I treasure those times and I often wonder what my Granddaughter will have to contend with in this media world.

Oh happy days says the old lady tapping away on her Computer.

and always remember that parents are not responsible for childrens actions, they do have their own free mind.

To watch parents blame themselves for their childs bad behavior or criminal actions is heartbreaking.
Not all can be blamed on the upbringing, sometimes bad apples come off an otherwise good tree

But it is a parent's resposibility to teach children. What they do with what they have learnt is up to them.

I was in a Community Participation workshop a week ago and the presentor was telling us about a Soup Kitchen in US deep south he visited. The Minister's story is that 50-60 homeless, helpless people would show up each day, grab a meal amd shamble off. Same story every day. A young girl starts working there and after a week says to the Minsiter "We are wasting our time doing this, I can't see it making any difference to them."

Next day he calls her in (was too shocked before) and discussed it with her. She said "We are feeding them, but not really helping them toget their lives back to something better."

After much thought, he started going down to the tables and talking with them. Turned out nearly half said they liked to cook. So they started getting some in to help cook. And those that had real talent have gone on to get jobs cooking and their lives back together. Now all the cooks in the Soup Kitchen are those 'poor pathetic helpless' people. And many others had skills they said they wanted to do. Now they help out in the community doing handyman work with many going back into the workforce.

Some just need direction, some a helping hand. And there are those who are beyond helping or simply don't want it.

You can teach someone everything, but it doesnt mean they will listen.

You can only teach what the person/child wants to learn.

To watch parents blame themselves, ostracise themselves because of a childs actions is heart breaking. The parents feel that they let the child down. Heartbreaking especially when the child is an adult and knew what they were doing, and that it WAS wrong.

Sometimes it is not the parents fault, a persons free will does come into it.