OMG!!! What do I do..?!! (83)
xxDandelionxx: I have just found my dear friend's husband on another dating website!!
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I think the best option is for you to let her know the FACTS and prepare yourself for the fallout.
I suspect if there is indeed cheating going on your friend will most likely know about it.
They might be in denial and you may perceive and experience real anger directed at you for bringing it forward. Can the friendship withstand the stormy weather?
If your friend is completely in the dark and still in love, I believe the info you provide will most likely be devastating but their reaction or anger won’t be directed at you as it would be in the case of their knowing but denying infidelity exists. I believe they’ll be more receptive and accepting of your friendship within this scenario.
Either way it’s best to inform. I know it would be difficult for me to know and face them not knowing that part of their life is possibly a lie.
Good luck…
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@ Dandelion.
Maybe put yourself in her shoes. What would SHE do if the circumstances were reversed.
Getting involved in other people's marital problems is never a good idea,and you would be involved if you informed her.
Some people are capable of covering up holes in their marital arrangements so maybe,just maybe she is aware.
You may end up losing a good friend and it could have a knock on effect with other friends too.j.m.o.
Maybe put yourself in her shoes. What would SHE do if the circumstances were reversed.
Getting involved in other people's marital problems is never a good idea,and you would be involved if you informed her.
Some people are capable of covering up holes in their marital arrangements so maybe,just maybe she is aware.
You may end up losing a good friend and it could have a knock on effect with other friends too.j.m.o.
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If she really was a dear friend you wouldn't hesitate 
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xxDandelionxx: I have just found my dear friend's husband on another dating website!!
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
Pray she does not see this on google
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Maybe send an anonymous letter to her house without saying your name. Stating the facts, that you uncovered that way you cant get implicated or just tell your friend in person. She deserves to know
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Thanks for the input from you all, and for taking the time and trouble. You're all superstars!
There is definitely food for thought there. Personally, I would want to know but she's not me..... its clear we would all have a different way of receiving information like that and some very valid points have been made.
Thanks again, peeps
There is definitely food for thought there. Personally, I would want to know but she's not me..... its clear we would all have a different way of receiving information like that and some very valid points have been made.
Thanks again, peeps
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xxDandelionxx: Thanks for the input from you all, and for taking the time and trouble. You're all superstars!
There is definitely food for thought there. Personally, I would want to know but she's not me..... its clear we would all have a different way of receiving information like that and some very valid points have been made.
Thanks again, peeps
There is definitely food for thought there. Personally, I would want to know but she's not me..... its clear we would all have a different way of receiving information like that and some very valid points have been made.
Thanks again, peeps
And are you prepared for questioning as to why YOU were also on another dating site ? .....
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purr4mance: I think the best option is for you to let her know the FACTS and prepare yourself for the fallout.
I suspect if there is indeed cheating going on your friend will most likely know about it.
They might be in denial and you may perceive and experience real anger directed at you for bringing it forward. Can the friendship withstand the stormy weather?
If your friend is completely in the dark and still in love, I believe the info you provide will most likely be devastating but their reaction or anger won’t be directed at you as it would be in the case of their knowing but denying infidelity exists. I believe they’ll be more receptive and accepting of your friendship within this scenario.
Either way it’s best to inform. I know it would be difficult for me to know and face them not knowing that part of their life is possibly a lie.
Good luck…
I suspect if there is indeed cheating going on your friend will most likely know about it.
They might be in denial and you may perceive and experience real anger directed at you for bringing it forward. Can the friendship withstand the stormy weather?
If your friend is completely in the dark and still in love, I believe the info you provide will most likely be devastating but their reaction or anger won’t be directed at you as it would be in the case of their knowing but denying infidelity exists. I believe they’ll be more receptive and accepting of your friendship within this scenario.
Either way it’s best to inform. I know it would be difficult for me to know and face them not knowing that part of their life is possibly a lie.
Good luck…
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Dadude62: Or make a fake profile with a picture of his wife,,,
I suppose it's possible someone did that to him,,,, a scammer maybe,,,
I suppose it's possible someone did that to him,,,, a scammer maybe,,,
seems as a great idea to me...
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xxDandelionxx: I have just found my dear friend's husband on another dating website!!
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I would suggest you talk to your dear friends husband and find out what he is doing. There may be an explanation.
Then if he can't come up with something that he is prepared to tell your dear friend, dob him in.
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xxDandelionxx: I have just found my dear friend's husband on another dating website!!
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
My advice for you would be, act surprised and shock when your friend tells you about her hubby
I mean sooner or later she s gonna bust him ...
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They could be in an open relationship.
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xxDandelionxx: I have just found my dear friend's husband on another dating website!!
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
Relax, if he's a solid guy, then probably just someone stole his picture and used it on a fake profile.
Ask him - either he's totally surprised and he'll want to know that someone is misusing his picture; or he's not surprised and then you can tell him to remove himself asap or you will tell.
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online today!online today!pisceslady7Kincumber nr. Gosford, New South Wales Australia21 Threads 4 Polls 1,910 Postsjustjim63: Send him a message on the site, and say something like "Oh i didn't realise that (insert your friends name) and you have seperated, i'll have to call her to see f she's ok?" I bet he'll be off the site quick smart, and probably never be able to look you straight in the eyes again.
I would have replied in exactly the same way! Hi JIm
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online today!online today!pisceslady7Kincumber nr. Gosford, New South Wales Australia21 Threads 4 Polls 1,910 PostsA similar case scenario "Do I tell".
A friend's fiance once made a very obvious pass at me. I told him that my I no longer trusted him and that if tried anything again I would tell my friend immediately. I was in my 20s then. Now my reaction would be different.
As I would want to know, and I have asked my close friends would THEY want to know I feel quite safe in telling a man.."you tell her or I will". My friends are all good people and I would find it abhorrent that some-one would lie/cheat by playing around (or attempting to) outside their marriage. They deserve better!
A friend's fiance once made a very obvious pass at me. I told him that my I no longer trusted him and that if tried anything again I would tell my friend immediately. I was in my 20s then. Now my reaction would be different.
As I would want to know, and I have asked my close friends would THEY want to know I feel quite safe in telling a man.."you tell her or I will". My friends are all good people and I would find it abhorrent that some-one would lie/cheat by playing around (or attempting to) outside their marriage. They deserve better!
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This is so sick. A lot of you folks are here on this site and not looking for anyone. What maes you so special? Now your first thought is to give an advice that could destroy somebodies life. 
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Sampe1967: This is so sick. A lot of you folks are here on this site and not looking for anyone. What maes you so special? Now your first thought is to give an advice that could destroy somebodies life.
Now lets be fair to the other posters too.
You also forgot to give credit to the people like myself and others who said they'd mind their own business.
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Ccincy: Now lets be fair to the other posters too.
You also forgot to give credit to the people like myself and others who said they'd mind their own business.
True, but i did say "a lot" that means not all.You also forgot to give credit to the people like myself and others who said they'd mind their own business.
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Sampe1967: True, but i did say "a lot" that means not all.
True also.
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I can't imagine my friend knows anything like this is going on. I feel a bit sick actually but I know that I will be damned whatever I do or don't do.
If I am the bearer of bad news, I will be hated but if I keep quiet and its discovered that I knew about it.......
He has always seemed a lovely fella, I wonder if its a blokey thing, i.e. a dare, a lark?
best of luck with this decision - it's a dewSIE! how close a friendship do you have?