Help, More Humorous Stories Are Needed (18)
AI_1984: A humorous look at punctuation
Do we need more stories that are humorous? or......
Do we need stories that are more humorous?
How Punctuation can make a sentence ambiguous and even change the meaning altogether.
Punctuation serves an important purpose in writing - to separate sentences, where to pause, where to place emphasis on particular words.
The comma, a little punctuation mark, can make a HUGE difference!
It can most of the time create amusement but, in some cases, it can also be a life-threatening danger.
Here is one of the most typical examples found on the Internet:
Its = possessive pronoun (mine, yours, his, its…) or it´s = it is (it´s good or…)
Some humorous examples:
“Most of the time, travelers worry about their luggage”, versus “Most of the time travelers worry about their luggage”. (are these time-travelers?) dunno
A teacher wrote on the blackboard ‘A woman without her man is nothing’ and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
All of the males in the class wrote: ‘A woman, without her man, is nothing.’
All the females in the class wrote: ‘A woman: without her, man is nothing.’
Can you add to the list?
Can anyone think of some humorous examples?Do we need more stories that are humorous? or......
Do we need stories that are more humorous?
How Punctuation can make a sentence ambiguous and even change the meaning altogether.
Punctuation serves an important purpose in writing - to separate sentences, where to pause, where to place emphasis on particular words.
The comma, a little punctuation mark, can make a HUGE difference!
It can most of the time create amusement but, in some cases, it can also be a life-threatening danger.
Here is one of the most typical examples found on the Internet:
Its = possessive pronoun (mine, yours, his, its…) or it´s = it is (it´s good or…)
Some humorous examples:
“Most of the time, travelers worry about their luggage”, versus “Most of the time travelers worry about their luggage”. (are these time-travelers?) dunno
A teacher wrote on the blackboard ‘A woman without her man is nothing’ and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
All of the males in the class wrote: ‘A woman, without her man, is nothing.’
All the females in the class wrote: ‘A woman: without her, man is nothing.’
Can you add to the list?
------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: Can anyone think of some humorous examples?
Tell me, was it good?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Friskyone: Tell me, was it good?
What was Frisky?------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: Can anyone think of some humorous examples?
yeah: a man without a beard is nothingA woman with a beard is something....
------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: What was Frisky?
Ummm...my performance
------ This thread is Archived ------
Friskyone: Tell me, was it good?
Sorry, I couldn't see any ambiguity here with the comma??? 
------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: Sorry, I couldn't see any ambiguity here with the comma???
Ooops, I failed my grammar class in high school------ This thread is Archived ------
michaelright: yeah: a man without a beard is nothing
A woman with a beard is something....
I can see any ambiguity here either? A woman with a beard is something....
Anyway, thanks for the joke.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Friskyone: Ummm...my performance
Thanks for bringing some humour Frisky.Did you read the last joke of the post?
It shows how wrong punctuation, or the lack of, makes a lot of difference.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Friskyone: Ooops, I failed my grammar class in high school
Not to worry! 
------ This thread is Archived ------
Friskyone: Ooops, I failed my grammar class in high school
so did I although it never made a bit of difference in my career ,,, except for odd crank here and there. 
------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: Thanks for bringing some humour Frisky.
Did you read the last joke of the post?
It shows how wrong punctuation, or the lack of, makes a lot of difference.
You're welcome.Did you read the last joke of the post?
It shows how wrong punctuation, or the lack of, makes a lot of difference.
And I agree, kinda like... you are and you're not
I'm glad you are here and nice to meet you
------ This thread is Archived ------
From the brilliant mind of Benny Hill:
"I'm not getting any better, come home."
"I'm not getting any, better come home."
"I'm not getting any better, come home."
"I'm not getting any, better come home."
------ This thread is Archived ------
KarloradoFL: From the brilliant mind of Benny Hill:
"I'm not getting any better, come home."
"I'm not getting any, better come home."
That's a good one! "I'm not getting any better, come home."
"I'm not getting any, better come home."
------ This thread is Archived ------
Well, I tell one.
When I just started living in this area, I went to the pub, about 3 doors from my house.
After several visits I was sitting outside enjoying my beer.
Then a group of people, walking with their dogs came by and sat down too, ordering drinks and food. The dogs where jumping and pushing their filthy mouths against my trousers. Well, I hate dogs, so when the owner of the pub came out I asked him to order the dogs away.
He said: They're innocent, don't be a crybaby.
So, pissed off, I went home.
Next day I took my pet, a big spider. It was walking on my head and shoulder and I went to the pub and sat outside. Within 5 minutes the people who were in- and outside were all gone. The spider wasn't poisonnous for people by the way.
So when all his customers left the owner came by and said to me: We've seen it now, will you take it away? I said: She's innocent, don't be a crybaby.
Since that day I wasn't welcome there anymore. Saved me over 10.000 euro's.
Since the 1st of january the pub is for sale, maybe the next owners have more sense of humour.
When I just started living in this area, I went to the pub, about 3 doors from my house.
After several visits I was sitting outside enjoying my beer.
Then a group of people, walking with their dogs came by and sat down too, ordering drinks and food. The dogs where jumping and pushing their filthy mouths against my trousers. Well, I hate dogs, so when the owner of the pub came out I asked him to order the dogs away.
He said: They're innocent, don't be a crybaby.
So, pissed off, I went home.
Next day I took my pet, a big spider. It was walking on my head and shoulder and I went to the pub and sat outside. Within 5 minutes the people who were in- and outside were all gone. The spider wasn't poisonnous for people by the way.
So when all his customers left the owner came by and said to me: We've seen it now, will you take it away? I said: She's innocent, don't be a crybaby.
Since that day I wasn't welcome there anymore. Saved me over 10.000 euro's.
Since the 1st of january the pub is for sale, maybe the next owners have more sense of humour.
------ This thread is Archived ------
AI_1984: A humorous look at punctuation
Do we need more stories that are humorous? or......
Do we need stories that are more humorous?
You seem confused between punctuation (, . ; : ? ! ) etc and SYNTAX ( word order )Do we need more stories that are humorous? or......
Do we need stories that are more humorous?
Your opening shows a change in syntax ... there's no variations of punctuation involved at all!
There a world of difference between
'The dog bit Johnny.' and 'Johnny bit the dog.'
------ This thread is Archived ------
HexagonKeySet: You seem confused between punctuation (, . ; : ? ! ) etc and SYNTAX ( word order )
Your opening shows a change in syntax ... there's no variations of punctuation involved at all!
There a world of difference between
'The dog bit Johnny.' and 'Johnny bit the dog.'
indeed and depends where the dog bit Jonny.Your opening shows a change in syntax ... there's no variations of punctuation involved at all!
There a world of difference between
'The dog bit Johnny.' and 'Johnny bit the dog.'
------ This thread is Archived ------
This Thread is Archived
This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.
« Go back to All Threads
« Go back to All Threads
More Threads
Gal / sdarlagg passed away on April 10, 2024
Kultur-multur
makeover
What happened to CS while i was away.. (Long time)
I'm a 53 YEAR'S YUNG MAN that lives back in the 80s
s*xual skills
Unions support Democrats!
Are the ads on here as phony as some of the profiles?
More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
Karen McDougal - Playmate Model will testify in Hush Money Trial
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
Stats for this Thread
620 Views
17 Comments
Created: Mar 2020
Last Viewed: Apr 12
Last Commented: Mar 2020
2 Likes
Last Liked: Mar 2020
Related Forums
- Gal / sdarlagg passed away on April 10, 2024
- Kultur-multur
- makeover
- What happened to CS while i was away.. (Long time)
- I'm a 53 YEAR'S YUNG MAN that lives back in the 80s
- s*xual skills
- Unions support Democrats!
- Are the ads on here as phony as some of the profiles?
- More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
- Karen McDougal - Playmate Model will testify in Hush Money Trial
Do we need more stories that are humorous? or......
Do we need stories that are more humorous?
How Punctuation can make a sentence ambiguous and even change the meaning altogether.
Punctuation serves an important purpose in writing - to separate sentences, where to pause, where to place emphasis on particular words.
The comma, a little punctuation mark, can make a HUGE difference!
It can most of the time create amusement but, in some cases, it can also be a life-threatening danger.
Here is one of the most typical examples found on the Internet:
Its = possessive pronoun (mine, yours, his, its…) or it´s = it is (it´s good or…)
Some humorous examples:
“Most of the time, travelers worry about their luggage”, versus “Most of the time travelers worry about their luggage”. (are these time-travelers?) dunno
A teacher wrote on the blackboard ‘A woman without her man is nothing’ and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
All of the males in the class wrote: ‘A woman, without her man, is nothing.’
All the females in the class wrote: ‘A woman: without her, man is nothing.’
Can you add to the list?