PILIPALAOPCardiff, South Glamorgan, Wales UK4,804 posts
Power of Beer A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.
After 18 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.
Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts into whoops of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son t o drink again. The patrons chant 'Take another drink!'
The bartender continu es to shake his head in dismay. Swoooosh! Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out.
The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, 'Take another drink! Take another drink!!' The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the amazing scenes.
By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Plop! Plip!! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos.
The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left, then to the right, then staggers right through the front door into the street where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly. The bar falls silent.
The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says,
PILIPALA: Power of Beer A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.
After 18 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.
Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts into whoops of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son t o drink again. The patrons chant 'Take another drink!'
The bartender continu es to shake his head in dismay. Swoooosh! Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out. The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, 'Take another drink! Take another drink!!' The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the amazing scenes. By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Plop! Plip!! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos.The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left, then to the right, then staggers right through the front door into the street where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly. The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says,
it's not funny you know, cause my friend Jonesy died in a pub.......
He walked into his local tavern and slipped on a dog turd, that was on the floor and he landed on his backside..... While ruffled slightly, he was enjoying his drink at the bar when a 25 stone biker named Killer, walked through the door and slipped over also on the same dog turd..... He ran from the bar to the biker and said I just done that!!!!!!!
I never saw Jonesy again.......
ha ha ha maybe you thought I was serious lol
not........
But my friend was just a head..like in the other story....
no arms...no legs...no body..
his name was Bob......
he was a good swimmer, thats why his name was Bob.....lol
he could tread water very well.......
even had a partime job as a bouy at station pier for when the ships come in....
he was a good dancer Bob was.....
he was good at all sports.....bob was always first picked in the teams...
anyway when he was 18 we went to the pub cause he wanted to be a good darts player....
I said Bob how are you going to play darts mate..... he said I show ya....
he said see that pack of darts in my collar, (cause as a head he only had the collar of his shirt)
he said well get them out of my collar! so I did...
he said now open the pack......and I did...
he said now put one in my mouth.....so I did...
he said now lift that dart board off the wall over there....did also...
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A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.
After 18 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.
Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts into whoops of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son t o drink again. The patrons chant 'Take another drink!'
The bartender continu es to shake his head in dismay. Swoooosh! Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out.
The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, 'Take another drink! Take another drink!!' The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the amazing scenes.
By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Plop! Plip!! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos.
The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left, then to the right, then staggers right through the front door into the street where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly. The bar falls silent.
The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says,
*
(Wait for it)
*
(It's coming)
*
(Ya ready?)
*
(Don't hate me)
*
*
(Your gonna hate me)
*
*
*
*
(Take a deep breath)
*
*
*
*
'He should've quit while he was a head!'