marriage ?? (178)
loves2steppin: <<<<<<<< walks in....reads threads and after 28 LONG yrs of being unhappily married.....has no comment.....
haha
But your not married now Whoop!
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CjTenorSax: as usual...here i come with my two cents...LATE...when everyones already talking about something else... ..
Um actually, I think I'm the "LATE" one here, by the time I caught up on the thread, my responses made it look like I've been carrying a dialoge with myself.
....lol....thats what mine usually look like as well....Um actually, I think I'm the "LATE" one here, by the time I caught up on the thread, my responses made it look like I've been carrying a dialoge with myself.
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dillydally: sorry but i need some info on this subject
whats the difference with being married and just living with someone ?(apart from the obvious) all week iv seen the same thing "il never get married again"
is it that bad ?
what would you say to a first timer wanting to get married ?? (yeah that would be me)
whats the difference with being married and just living with someone ?(apart from the obvious) all week iv seen the same thing "il never get married again"
is it that bad ?
what would you say to a first timer wanting to get married ?? (yeah that would be me)
If I am willing to live with some lady and reap the benefits of living together, I had damn well better be willing to be married to her...JMO
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diogenes: I once heard a relationship expert say that living with someone without being married could be detrimental tot he relationship for this reason...
When a couple is not married there is no sense of permanence, either party is free to leave at any time. If the couple lives together for a while, and then gets married, then they tend to carry that feeling of impermanence with them into their marriage.
Personally, I feel like courts should make a divorce more difficult to obtain, and sort of force couples to take a look at themselves and how to work on staying together. Broken familes make broken children, and broken children grow up to make broken families.
When a couple is not married there is no sense of permanence, either party is free to leave at any time. If the couple lives together for a while, and then gets married, then they tend to carry that feeling of impermanence with them into their marriage.
Personally, I feel like courts should make a divorce more difficult to obtain, and sort of force couples to take a look at themselves and how to work on staying together. Broken familes make broken children, and broken children grow up to make broken families.
I agree 100%... living together is like playing house without the commitment... relationships... any relationships even family and friends requires commitment and work, having a situation whereby you can walk away without really trying to make it work, is a recipe for disaster, and is detrimental to any hope of future success... been there bought the t-shirt....
Any marriage that is worth its salt has survived conflict of some sort, some of the best marriages I know have survived all sorts of things including infidelity, financial struggle.. etc... these are the marriages that work.. why do people not want to make the effort any more.... when you marry someone, they become like a member of your family.. you become a new family... if I were to turn my back every time a member of my family have pissed me off over the years I dread to think.. unconditional love... thats what its all about.. none of us are a piece of cake when you think about it.. JMO
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Aries01: I agree 100%... living together is like playing house without the commitment... relationships... any relationships even family and friends requires commitment and work, having a situation whereby you can walk away without really trying to make it work, is a recipe for disaster, and is detrimental to any hope of future success... been there bought the t-shirt....
Any marriage that is worth its salt has survived conflict of some sort, some of the best marriages I know have survived all sorts of things including infidelity, financial struggle.. etc... these are the marriages that work.. why do people not want to make the effort any more.... when you marry someone, they become like a member of your family.. you become a new family... if I were to turn my back every time a member of my family have pissed me off over the years I dread to think.. unconditional love... thats what its all about.. none of us are a piece of cake when you think about it.. JMO
Any marriage that is worth its salt has survived conflict of some sort, some of the best marriages I know have survived all sorts of things including infidelity, financial struggle.. etc... these are the marriages that work.. why do people not want to make the effort any more.... when you marry someone, they become like a member of your family.. you become a new family... if I were to turn my back every time a member of my family have pissed me off over the years I dread to think.. unconditional love... thats what its all about.. none of us are a piece of cake when you think about it.. JMO
I think for a lot of people it just playing house, married or not.
No need for a piece of paper to say you're committed to one another. It should run deeper than something that really is too hard to even wipe your butt with.
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Aries01: I agree 100%... living together is like playing house without the commitment... relationships... any relationships even family and friends requires commitment and work, having a situation whereby you can walk away without really trying to make it work, is a recipe for disaster, and is detrimental to any hope of future success... been there bought the t-shirt....
Any marriage that is worth its salt has survived conflict of some sort, some of the best marriages I know have survived all sorts of things including infidelity, financial struggle.. etc... these are the marriages that work.. why do people not want to make the effort any more.... when you marry someone, they become like a member of your family.. you become a new family... if I were to turn my back every time a member of my family have pissed me off over the years I dread to think.. unconditional love... thats what its all about.. none of us are a piece of cake when you think about it.. JMO
Any marriage that is worth its salt has survived conflict of some sort, some of the best marriages I know have survived all sorts of things including infidelity, financial struggle.. etc... these are the marriages that work.. why do people not want to make the effort any more.... when you marry someone, they become like a member of your family.. you become a new family... if I were to turn my back every time a member of my family have pissed me off over the years I dread to think.. unconditional love... thats what its all about.. none of us are a piece of cake when you think about it.. JMO
I don't know about you Europeans, but, i wish there were more divorces in Africa! There would be less deaths, caused by AIDS and less deprived orphans.
If a person cheats on you once, then i say, LEAVE, !!!!!!!!
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lusciousmile: Your profile says you have a child, yet, have never been married.
Hey hun, I didn't say I was a good enough person to live by it. I simply said what I beleive is right and wrong, and yes, I've done alot of wrong in my day, but it doesn't make it RIGHT
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Well I agree with you there Kid... people have to go INTO marriage in the first place with a sincere and genuine intention to commit in the real sense.. its not a game.. well not to me anyway... If I ever do get married.. which tbh probably not... it will ONLY be with someone that I genuinely want to spend the rest of my life with.. now I know I can't tell the future etc.. but the intention will definitely have to be there... as to living with someone first.. no way.. unfortunately.. been there bought the t-shirt..
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Tater: Hey hun, I didn't say I was a good enough person to live by it. I simply said what I beleive is right and wrong, and yes, I've done alot of wrong in my day, but it doesn't make it RIGHT
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Tater: Hey hun, I didn't say I was a good enough person to live by it. I simply said what I beleive is right and wrong, and yes, I've done alot of wrong in my day, but it doesn't make it RIGHT
I'm sure ur kid is a lil angel... nothing wrong about that
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Aries01: Well I agree with you there Kid... people have to go INTO marriage in the first place with a sincere and genuine intention to commit in the real sense.. its not a game.. well not to me anyway... If I ever do get married.. which tbh probably not... it will ONLY be with someone that I genuinely want to spend the rest of my life with.. now I know I can't tell the future etc.. but the intention will definitely have to be there... as to living with someone first.. no way.. unfortunately.. been there bought the t-shirt..
Yeah, I wouldn't live with someone unless I thought they were going to be there forever either, but that still doesn't mean I'll get married to do it.
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kidatheart: Yeah, I wouldn't live with someone unless I thought they were going to be there forever either, but that still doesn't mean I'll get married to do it.
We are just gonna have to agree to disagree on this one sweetie... gotta hit the hay... nearly 4am here... nite, nite
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Aries01: We are just gonna have to agree to disagree on this one sweetie... gotta hit the hay... nearly 4am here... nite, nite
Good night Orla
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CjTenorSax: Well said, Riya
Thanku ..
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kidatheart: All of that can be had without being married, no difference. It's about the commitment, not the act of marriage.
It's just as easy to walk away or give up either way, if that's what you're inclination is.
I'm not totally opposed to the idea, just not the way most people view marriage. The commitment has to be there beforehand and in the end it's just a piece of paper to me.
It's just as easy to walk away or give up either way, if that's what you're inclination is.
I'm not totally opposed to the idea, just not the way most people view marriage. The commitment has to be there beforehand and in the end it's just a piece of paper to me.
ok, i just looked cowboy at your profile, it states you are spritual but not religious, when you stand before God and make a vow that is your incentive to not just easily walk away, a piece of paper only? not in my opinion, it is a vow that goes deeper than just to each other, after all we are mere humans and are apt to walk away but with the vow you have made to God, you will more likely than not think twice about it, jmo.tR
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irishlass45: ok, i just looked cowboy at your profile, it states you are spritual but not religious, when you stand before God and make a vow that is your incentive to not just easily walk away, a piece of paper only? not in my opinion, it is a vow that goes deeper than just to each other, after all we are mere humans and are apt to walk away but with the vow you have made to God, you will more likely than not think twice about it, jmo.tR
Hi R
With all due respect, I would never get married in a church if I ever did anyway. I don't believe in any of that. The only commitment or vow I'd be making is to my significant other, nobody or anything else.
Not enough choices in selecting your beliefs. That was the closest I could fine. If they had other, I'd pick that. I'll look just in case something's changed.
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In response to:
what would you say to a first timer wanting to get married ?? (yeah that would be me)
what would you say to a first timer wanting to get married ?? (yeah that would be me)
DON'T!!!!!!
Kidding. Seriously,do not get married if you're not sure you want to be. The fact that you're on here asking advice tells me you have some reservations. Work those out for youself, and be sure that you really want to make the commitment for the rest of your life. Relationships don't always work even when you have that, but they're highly unlikely to if you go into it thinking it might not be right.
The piece of paper really means little, it's the willingness to share your whole life and all of yourself with someone that it symbolizes that is important.
But what do I know, I haven't gotten it right yet? 
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BTW, hi there.