Is It Serious??? (20)
wikkedAjax, Ontario Canada655 Threads 4 Polls 6,091 PostsHow do you know when your relationship has moved to another level and gotten perhaps "serious"...??
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I think it'd depend on what level you're looking at currently, and what your definition of serious is. If it went from talking and chatting to meeting RL, that could be considered a serious step. After that, moving to be with them would be another, followed by proposal and marriage, etc.
My .02
My .02
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Since your posts are sage...then let me ask you..if you go from chatting to meeting...and then being introduced to family members...and staying overnight...but he's telling you that he doesn't think its going to work...and you're still chatting and talking of getting together again...where do you stand then?
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"but he's telling you that he doesn't think its going to work".....
your own words give you the answer.... the friendship may continue.. but he doesn't expect it to go any further.... yeah he might still want to "sleep" together... but truly he has already given his answer. Listen to what he has said.
your own words give you the answer.... the friendship may continue.. but he doesn't expect it to go any further.... yeah he might still want to "sleep" together... but truly he has already given his answer. Listen to what he has said.
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At that point.. you're standing on the edge of a tall building, for lack of a better analogy. It can go either way, and your discussions and reactions to each other will determine which way things fall. At that point.. I'd be very careful if I were you. I am sure that you immediately threw red flags regarding the situation as my mind did when I read it. I cannot speculate fully without knowing what's going on in his head, but in my eyes I'm thinking that he could be a bit gun-shy relationship-wise, or he's looking for something more friends-with-priviliges based without a solid commitment. That's purely speculatory but is how I see it to this point. I hope this post is more helpful than confusing as well.
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"...but he's telling you that he doesn't think its going to work..."
Seems to me that says it all right there.
Seems to me that says it all right there.
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Thank you both...
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But aren't actions supposed to speak louder than words?
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If he can get slices of the pie .... it doesn't mean that he actually wants the whole thing.
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Actions speak volumes, however if the actions don't match the words.. inconsistency can lead to doubt or questioning. Without trust and understanding while being on the same page, don't you think that'd make it hard regardless of the actions/words pair just the same?
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Exactly.
However, he probably assumes that the woman is also enjoying the slices of pie so he see no harm in that. Especially if he has already made his intentions clear, which he did.
In other words, he's not deceiving the woman, he made it clear that the relationship not going anywhere, so if she continues to see him after than then he takes that to mean that she's enjoying the slices of pie too. (her actions speak too!)
However, he probably assumes that the woman is also enjoying the slices of pie so he see no harm in that. Especially if he has already made his intentions clear, which he did.
In other words, he's not deceiving the woman, he made it clear that the relationship not going anywhere, so if she continues to see him after than then he takes that to mean that she's enjoying the slices of pie too. (her actions speak too!)
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Yes...
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Please refer to my new thread Door #3...
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All relationships change,
no one can tell their own future...
let alone yours.
no one can tell their own future...
let alone yours.
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His actions and words are saying different things.
His words are saying that he's not falling in love with you.
His actions are saying that he enjoys being with you rather than being alone.
So there's no conflict between what he's saying and how he is acting.
(I see if I can find Door #3)
His words are saying that he's not falling in love with you.
His actions are saying that he enjoys being with you rather than being alone.
So there's no conflict between what he's saying and how he is acting.
(I see if I can find Door #3)
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Sounds like he is saying he wants it to stay as it is.
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Always wondered is love known or understood by actions, or is love known or understood by our heart??
is it serious?? to some the holding of the hand in public validates the seriousness, to others it is the calling and contact daily that validates the seriousness. I have even seen here on CS the withdrawing of oneself from the forums to display the quality of their intentions.
If you indeed have to ask the question... it is someone else that should do the answering.
Good Luck and I hope you find out soon
is it serious?? to some the holding of the hand in public validates the seriousness, to others it is the calling and contact daily that validates the seriousness. I have even seen here on CS the withdrawing of oneself from the forums to display the quality of their intentions.
If you indeed have to ask the question... it is someone else that should do the answering.
Good Luck and I hope you find out soon
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Oh so true Abra..lol
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casually in the backgroud
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Created: May 2006
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