The Mystery of Romantic Attraction (127)
rusty_knight: 'fluffy duffy stuff'- wazzat?
Could it be a large coffee served in bed with two straws?
Could it be a large coffee served in bed with two straws?
Only if if served on a silver platter....None of the plastic stuff you can buy in Asda/Walmart...
But the fluffy duffy stuff .....flowers, chocs etc..being dopey..
Big adviserq, Phoenix do you give lessons
phoenix: Only if if served on a silver platter....None of the plastic stuff you can buy in Asda/Walmart...
But the fluffy duffy stuff .....flowers, chocs etc..being dopey..
But the fluffy duffy stuff .....flowers, chocs etc..being dopey..
whats fluffy duffy about that, its called respect and appreciation. Most women like that as well as brekkies in bed
gingerb: If it was only on a purely visual level, then how to people who have never met, fall for each other on the internet, when often neither have pics up?
My theory is that it is projected energy. I think it happens at a sub-atomic level, maybe enhanced by other things and the combination of things varies from person to person.
It might explain why we get the "same" recognisable feelings as when we were younger and first in love, even though we are different people as we get older with different priorities and values, tastes etc.
The fact that the "knowing" a certain person is what/who we want has to be something that is constant about us. Our feelings change, our personality changes, our appearance changes, but this "recognition" and "chemistry" with the "right" person doesn't change at all, s it would have to be something outside of our evoling as humans in a physiological and psychological way.
Anyone else think this?
My theory is that it is projected energy. I think it happens at a sub-atomic level, maybe enhanced by other things and the combination of things varies from person to person.
It might explain why we get the "same" recognisable feelings as when we were younger and first in love, even though we are different people as we get older with different priorities and values, tastes etc.
The fact that the "knowing" a certain person is what/who we want has to be something that is constant about us. Our feelings change, our personality changes, our appearance changes, but this "recognition" and "chemistry" with the "right" person doesn't change at all, s it would have to be something outside of our evoling as humans in a physiological and psychological way.
Anyone else think this?
Hi ginge
gingerb: If it was only on a purely visual level, then how to people who have never met, fall for each other on the internet, when often neither have pics up?
My theory is that it is projected energy. I think it happens at a sub-atomic level, maybe enhanced by other things and the combination of things varies from person to person.
It might explain why we get the "same" recognisable feelings as when we were younger and first in love, even though we are different people as we get older with different priorities and values, tastes etc.
The fact that the "knowing" a certain person is what/who we want has to be something that is constant about us. Our feelings change, our personality changes, our appearance changes, but this "recognition" and "chemistry" with the "right" person doesn't change at all, s it would have to be something outside of our evoling as humans in a physiological and psychological way.
Anyone else think this?
My theory is that it is projected energy. I think it happens at a sub-atomic level, maybe enhanced by other things and the combination of things varies from person to person.
It might explain why we get the "same" recognisable feelings as when we were younger and first in love, even though we are different people as we get older with different priorities and values, tastes etc.
The fact that the "knowing" a certain person is what/who we want has to be something that is constant about us. Our feelings change, our personality changes, our appearance changes, but this "recognition" and "chemistry" with the "right" person doesn't change at all, s it would have to be something outside of our evoling as humans in a physiological and psychological way.
Anyone else think this?
Yes... that feeling of knowing someone... of recognition... that´s what is so hard to understand.
As far as it happening online... that´s not an option for me. Twice, once online and once by phone... I thought I had met someone special, but when the face to face meeting came... I was looking into the eyes of a stranger... so I don´t allow myself to go down that road any more. If I feel a connection it stays as a fun flirtation unless we can plan to meet soon.
gussi: Hi ginge
Hi Gussi
Hope you are having a good day.
jbibiza: Yes... that feeling of knowing someone... of recognition... that´s what is so hard to understand.
As far as it happening online... that´s not an option for me. Twice, once online and once by phone... I thought I had met someone special, but when the face to face meeting came... I was looking into the eyes of a stranger... so I don´t allow myself to go down that road any more. If I feel a connection it stays as a fun flirtation unless we can plan to meet soon.
As far as it happening online... that´s not an option for me. Twice, once online and once by phone... I thought I had met someone special, but when the face to face meeting came... I was looking into the eyes of a stranger... so I don´t allow myself to go down that road any more. If I feel a connection it stays as a fun flirtation unless we can plan to meet soon.
Just a thought..........Blind people fall in love too.....
Lagoona22: ...I believe people confuse the terms "romance" and "infatuation" and "love"...
Would anybody like to have a shot at a definition of those terms ,and how the one differs from the others....
Would anybody like to have a shot at a definition of those terms ,and how the one differs from the others....
Lagonna all I have to say is if our lives ever cross paths..I'll buy the first pint...
Listen folks it's not rocket science..maybe the geezer who started the thread should leave Ireland more often..or...maybe he's a thicker mick than me..
Lagoona22: Phoenix, spot on...I believe people confuse the terms "romance" and "infatuation" and "love"...
Would anybody like to have a shot at a definition of those terms ,and how the one differs from the others....
Would anybody like to have a shot at a definition of those terms ,and how the one differs from the others....
Romance is the ambiance.
Infatuation is a childish need or want.
Love is total acceptance.
jbibiza: It is a mystery indeed and subjective to individuals, fortunatley.... or we would all be competing for the same select few...
When I get hit, I get hit hard... and literally can´t see anyone but him.
I was spending a weekend in Monterey with a girlfriend. We were at a dance club and I had met a really nice guy... had spent a couple of hours talking and dancing... exchanged phone numbers etc. Then this man walked in... my girlfriend though he was ok, but nothing to write home about... for me... he was all I could see.
I turned to the man I had been with and apologized saying that I had really enjoyed him and his company, but I had seen someone who took my breath away and whether or not I even spoke to him... it wouldn´t be right to continue because my head would be somewhere else.
Well we did wind up speaking... spent the rest of the weekend together, and were together for a year after that... I almost married him... but that´s another story.
There is no way that I can explain this sort of attraction, it is indeed a mystery.
When I get hit, I get hit hard... and literally can´t see anyone but him.
I was spending a weekend in Monterey with a girlfriend. We were at a dance club and I had met a really nice guy... had spent a couple of hours talking and dancing... exchanged phone numbers etc. Then this man walked in... my girlfriend though he was ok, but nothing to write home about... for me... he was all I could see.
I turned to the man I had been with and apologized saying that I had really enjoyed him and his company, but I had seen someone who took my breath away and whether or not I even spoke to him... it wouldn´t be right to continue because my head would be somewhere else.
Well we did wind up speaking... spent the rest of the weekend together, and were together for a year after that... I almost married him... but that´s another story.
There is no way that I can explain this sort of attraction, it is indeed a mystery.
Ah, thats so lovely to hear, makes my day............
gingerb: Maybe it is a difference in men and women kind of thing. So far the men on here don't seem to be "getting it" on the level we are trying to explain it. Though I have to admit you are doing a better job of it than me so far.
Maybe for me it really is visual......
Maybe for me it really is visual......
or maybe they have never experienced it... I know that men can experience it because the man I referred to felt the same way I did.
I was the one who made the first move... he was quite involved with family and friends and not looking around so I hadn´t been able to catch his eye. I went up and asked him to dance... he said yes and when the dance ended I bolted for the ladies room. I knew how strongly I was attracted to him and couldn´t face the potentially akward moment when the dance ended... not knowing if he would just walk off, try to make polite conversation...
When I came out... I sat on the other side of the room with a pillar between us... about 15 minutes went by when I felt a hand on my shoulder and a voice saying... I thought I lost you... that was all it took.
gingerb: Maybe it is a difference in men and women kind of thing. So far the men on here don't seem to be "getting it" on the level we are trying to explain it. Though I have to admit you are doing a better job of it than me so far.
Maybe forme men it really is visual......
Maybe for
gingerb: Maybe for me men it really is visual......
Have to admit... I was a bit confused, but now it´s clear. 
phoenix: Lagonna all I have to say is if our lives ever cross paths..I'll buy the first pint...
Listen folks it's not rocket science..maybe the geezer who started the thread should leave Ireland more often..or...maybe he's a thicker mick than me..
Listen folks it's not rocket science..maybe the geezer who started the thread should leave Ireland more often..or...maybe he's a thicker mick than me..
jbibiza: or maybe they have never experienced it... I know that men can experience it because the man I referred to felt the same way I did.
I was the one who made the first move... he was quite involved with family and friends and not looking around so I hadn´t been able to catch his eye. I went up and asked him to dance... he said yes and when the dance ended I bolted for the ladies room. I knew how strongly I was attracted to him and couldn´t face the potentially akward moment when the dance ended... not knowing if he would just walk off, try to make polite conversation...
When I came out... I sat on the other side of the room with a pillar between us... about 15 minutes went by when I felt a hand on my shoulder and a voice saying... I thought I lost you... that was all it took.
I was the one who made the first move... he was quite involved with family and friends and not looking around so I hadn´t been able to catch his eye. I went up and asked him to dance... he said yes and when the dance ended I bolted for the ladies room. I knew how strongly I was attracted to him and couldn´t face the potentially akward moment when the dance ended... not knowing if he would just walk off, try to make polite conversation...
When I came out... I sat on the other side of the room with a pillar between us... about 15 minutes went by when I felt a hand on my shoulder and a voice saying... I thought I lost you... that was all it took.
Last time I had attraction like that I was 18 and he was 46 and married, though I didn't know it when I first met him. In fact I only suspectd it after he was gone, and someone confirmed it months later.
I had done as you did and left someone I was having dinner with, to spend the evening with him. We danced, even though he had broken his ankle and was on crutches at the time. The world didn't exist. We dated for a few months and then he did the honourable thing and left, and I moved away.
When we were together, we were inseperable, he ran my baths, brushed my hair, filled his whole being with me and I dressed to please him, saw to his comfort, adored him, and nothing in the world existed for me outside of him.
Hardly a day goes by, yet, when I dont think of him and what might have been. It obviously wasn't to be. Life plays it's little jokes.
Strange thing is, I never cried for him or missed him because he didn't break my heart.
I think he took it with him instead for safekeeping........
Come on guys do you remember how simple it all was when we were 18/19 ...boy meets girl ...boy likes girl...girl likes boy......and the rest is history ..there wasnt all this angst.......one just got on with it 
ghost007: Come on guys do you remember how simple it all was when we were 18/19 ...boy meets girl ...boy likes girl...girl likes boy......and the rest is history ..there wasnt all this angst.......one just got on with it
I've been saying the same thing along...so has lagoona. It's not rocket science.
phoenix: I've been saying the same thing along...so has lagoona. It's not rocket science.
We actually agree on something
ahhhgggg..........LOL 
ghost007: We actually agree on something ahhhgggg..........LOL
Nah..You agree wiyh Lagoona and me..doesn't have the same ring now does it..
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You posted this when even nocturnal animals sleep.
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