Want a divorce ( Archived) (24)

Nov 15, 2008 5:33 PM CST Want a divorce
desmond
desmonddesmondkissimmee, Florida USA375 Threads 10,888 Posts
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him - "very quick."

The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"

POLE: "JA, JA, acre and half and nice little home."

LAWYER: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

POLE: "It made of concrete."

LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"

POLE: "No, we have carport, and not need one."

LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"

POLE: "All my relations still in Poland."

LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

POLE: "Ja, we have hi- fidelity stereo set and good DVD player."

LAWYER: Does your wife beat you up?"

POLE: "No, I always up before her."

LAWYER: "Is your wife a nagger?"

POLE: "No, she white."

LAWYER: "WHY do you want this divorce?"

POLE: "She going to kill me."

LAWYER: "What makes you think that?"

POLE: "I got proof.

LAWYER: "What kind of proof?"

POLE: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say, 'Polish Remover'."
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Nov 15, 2008 5:37 PM CST Want a divorce
druidess6308
druidess6308druidess6308Aliquippa, Pennsylvania USA79 Threads 13,695 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 15, 2008 5:47 PM CST Want a divorce
lovaboy
lovaboylovaboyBig Bad Manchester, Greater Manchester, England UK47 Threads 6,806 Posts
laugh thumbs up
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Nov 15, 2008 5:53 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
Good one Des rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 15, 2008 5:54 PM CST Want a divorce
Justme4uok
Justme4uokJustme4uokNorthern CA, California USA28 Threads 5,737 Posts
OMG Hello Joey!!!teddybear
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Nov 15, 2008 6:00 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
Justme4uok: OMG Hello Joey!!!


Hi Dori hug bouquet

Hope all has been well.
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Nov 15, 2008 6:01 PM CST Want a divorce
desmond
desmonddesmondkissimmee, Florida USA375 Threads 10,888 Posts
branded: Good one Des




Hi Joey good to see you buddy handshake cheers
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Nov 15, 2008 6:02 PM CST Want a divorce
Justme4uok
Justme4uokJustme4uokNorthern CA, California USA28 Threads 5,737 Posts
branded: Hi Dori

Hope all has been well.



I've been better, but thanks for asking....hug
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Nov 15, 2008 6:02 PM CST Want a divorce
witchiewoman
witchiewomanwitchiewomanSomewhere, North Carolina USA382 Posts
laugh
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Nov 15, 2008 6:04 PM CST Want a divorce
jojo69
jojo69jojo69Birmingham, but from Liverpool, West Midlands, England UK15 Threads 1 Polls 1,565 Posts
desmond: A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him - "very quick."

The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"

POLE: "JA, JA, acre and half and nice little home."

LAWYER: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

POLE: "It made of concrete."

LAWYER: "Does either of you have a real grudge?"

POLE: "No, we have carport, and not need one."

LAWYER: "I mean, What are your relations like?"

POLE: "All my relations still in Poland."

LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

POLE: "Ja, we have hi- fidelity stereo set and good DVD player."

LAWYER: Does your wife beat you up?"

POLE: "No, I always up before her."

LAWYER: "Is your wife a nagger?"

POLE: "No, she white."

LAWYER: "WHY do you want this divorce?"

POLE: "She going to kill me."

LAWYER: "What makes you think that?"

POLE: "I got proof.

LAWYER: "What kind of proof?"

POLE: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say, 'Polish Remover'."



OMG!! So friggin funny! thumbs up rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 15, 2008 6:05 PM CST Want a divorce
waiting4u
waiting4uwaiting4uGB's Heart, Oregon USA3 Threads 1,869 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 15, 2008 6:05 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
desmond: Hi Joey good to see you buddy


Glad to see you too. How've you been ?
handshake
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Nov 15, 2008 6:06 PM CST Want a divorce
desmond
desmonddesmondkissimmee, Florida USA375 Threads 10,888 Posts
branded: Glad to see you too. How've you been ?



Joey I have been good,how about you
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Nov 15, 2008 6:08 PM CST Want a divorce
hollandgirl
hollandgirlhollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada523 Threads 4,464 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing Good one Des...........rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Nov 15, 2008 6:09 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
Justme4uok: I've been better, but thanks for asking....


Well I hope it gets better for you.
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Nov 15, 2008 6:11 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
desmond: Joey I have been good,how about you



rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing Tring VERY hard to stay out of trouble like usual. But I've been doing good thx for asking.
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Nov 15, 2008 6:12 PM CST Want a divorce
Justme4uok
Justme4uokJustme4uokNorthern CA, California USA28 Threads 5,737 Posts
branded: Tring VERY hard to stay out of trouble like usual. But I've been doing good thx for asking.



Written any stories lately? dunno
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Nov 15, 2008 6:15 PM CST Want a divorce
branded
brandedbrandedpoplar bluff, Missouri USA4 Threads 850 Posts
Justme4uok: Written any stories lately?
innocent dunno angel No clue what you're talking about rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing









































I plead the 5 th
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Nov 15, 2008 6:22 PM CST Want a divorce
Indyfella
IndyfellaIndyfellaindianapolis, Indiana USA152 Threads 8 Polls 18,150 Posts
laugh
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Nov 15, 2008 7:36 PM CST Want a divorce
brokenspirit
brokenspiritbrokenspiritLittlespot, Nebraska USA41 Threads 603 Posts
Hi Des, Now that was funny.laugh laugh laugh
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by desmond (375 Threads)
Created: Nov 2008
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