My thoughts are keenly focused
Then suddenly they’re in overdrive
I can’t maintain a targets clear aim
When feelings roughly push me aside

Doggedly I go through the motions
Getting my work ready on my desk
While struggling with all my emotions
I’m thinking about him instead!

He had a mysterious hold on me
That I thought would ease over time
But the harder I try to fiercely resist
I’m compelled to keep looking behind

This is so damned ridiculous!!!
And it’s making me a little bit crazy!
Everything could’ve already been done
If that’s what he’d wanted from me

I’m not the one who gave up the goal
Doubting, and dropping the ball
He stopped playing, let me know that he quit
At least this is what, and how I recall

I’m not a sucker for punishment
So I took my licks and I left
But ever since then I’ve been haunted
By the scenarios deep in my head

I know better than to wish for what’s not
So I blocked his memory from my vision
But I fear this personal battle's been lost
And we’re headed for a painful collision

Or maybe he and I were just a fantasy
There was no way we’d ever get together
And now it’s time for me to forget the past
Perhaps that will make me feel better!

Or maybe, just maybe
I’ll keep sticking to my guns
Because Rome wasn’t built in a day
And once he sees that I really mean business
He’ll relent and finally give me my way

One can still pray...

July 18, 2013