What would you do if you saw a man physically abusing a woman (girlfriend) in public? (45)
tomcatwarne: I have been in this position, only to have them both turn on me and tell me to mind my own business.
Of course it would depend on the severity of the attack. If it was very serious I would restrain him. until she could get away.
I hope you're smarter than that.Of course it would depend on the severity of the attack. If it was very serious I would restrain him. until she could get away.
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CapNemo: I hope you're smarter than that.
What do you mean???
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I would do this...
...if I could
...if I could
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To him or her
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tomcatwarne: What do you mean???
I didn't get it either, but I was in a bar some years ago when a guy had strolled in and saw a couple regulars arguing back and forth with some physical contact as well. The Man stepped in and the woman smacked him first and the man got a hold of him as the couple verbally and physically beat the man a pretty good beating for trying to get involved.
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ali110: i will call police
What would the police do in Pakistan?
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I WILL CALL THE COPS AND THEN I WILL GO OVER THERE TO HELP CALM HIM DOWN IF POSSIBLE BY DOING THAT I WILL BE BUYING TIME FOR THE COPS AT THE SAME TIME GIVING HIM DIVIDED ATTENTION, HE WILL TRY TO STOP ME FROM STOPING HIM FROM ABUSING HIS LADY 
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jac379: What would the police do in Pakistan?
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The police wouldn't exactly break their necks to get to the scene of a crime such as this in this country and police handling of such events is a lot better than it used to be.
I also wonder from a couple of comments from the men here whether women intervening are less of a target than men. I worked for a women's refuge for a year as part of my degree course and volunteered for quite some time afterwards and also worked in temporary housing for (supposedly) ex-offenders. I never found getting inbetween a problem in terms of my own security.
I remember seeing a documentary on the phenomenon of "bystander apathy" where an experiment was set up: an incident was repeatedly set up in public where a man was attacking a woman who was obviously his "partner". Most people looked, but walked by, but I do remember one woman being filmed running full pelt at them shouting, "You can't do that! You can't do that!" and then splitting the "couple" before the researchers intervened. I felt it was enormously brave of her. I've always known at least on party when I've intervened.
Its interesting to note that most of the "bystander apathy" research was inspired by the case of Kitty Genovese:
I also wonder from a couple of comments from the men here whether women intervening are less of a target than men. I worked for a women's refuge for a year as part of my degree course and volunteered for quite some time afterwards and also worked in temporary housing for (supposedly) ex-offenders. I never found getting inbetween a problem in terms of my own security.
I remember seeing a documentary on the phenomenon of "bystander apathy" where an experiment was set up: an incident was repeatedly set up in public where a man was attacking a woman who was obviously his "partner". Most people looked, but walked by, but I do remember one woman being filmed running full pelt at them shouting, "You can't do that! You can't do that!" and then splitting the "couple" before the researchers intervened. I felt it was enormously brave of her. I've always known at least on party when I've intervened.
Its interesting to note that most of the "bystander apathy" research was inspired by the case of Kitty Genovese:
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jac379: The police wouldn't exactly break their necks to get to the scene of a crime such as this in this country and police handling of such events is a lot better than it used to be.
I also wonder from a couple of comments from the men here whether women intervening are less of a target than men. I worked for a women's refuge for a year as part of my degree course and volunteered for quite some time afterwards and also worked in temporary housing for (supposedly) ex-offenders. I never found getting inbetween a problem in terms of my own security.
I remember seeing a documentary on the phenomenon of "bystander apathy" where an experiment was set up: an incident was repeatedly set up in public where a man was attacking a woman who was obviously his "partner". Most people looked, but walked by, but I do remember one woman being filmed running full pelt at them shouting, "You can't do that! You can't do that!" and then splitting the "couple" before the researchers intervened. I felt it was enormously brave of her. I've always known at least on party when I've intervened.
Its interesting to note that most of the "bystander apathy" research was inspired by the case of Kitty Genovese:
I also wonder from a couple of comments from the men here whether women intervening are less of a target than men. I worked for a women's refuge for a year as part of my degree course and volunteered for quite some time afterwards and also worked in temporary housing for (supposedly) ex-offenders. I never found getting inbetween a problem in terms of my own security.
I remember seeing a documentary on the phenomenon of "bystander apathy" where an experiment was set up: an incident was repeatedly set up in public where a man was attacking a woman who was obviously his "partner". Most people looked, but walked by, but I do remember one woman being filmed running full pelt at them shouting, "You can't do that! You can't do that!" and then splitting the "couple" before the researchers intervened. I felt it was enormously brave of her. I've always known at least on party when I've intervened.
Its interesting to note that most of the "bystander apathy" research was inspired by the case of Kitty Genovese:
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I don't know. Probably nothing as I would have no idea what was going on between them. Again it would depend on severity but some women have openly admitted to me that they have gone out of their way to provoke fights. Other women such as Cheryl Cole are by their own admission just thugs. She beat her husband senseless though he didn't react. I would have.
I believe society needs to let go of this notion that all women are poor little victims. It is often not the case. Men are automatically blamed in any situation and this is wrong.
I believe society needs to let go of this notion that all women are poor little victims. It is often not the case. Men are automatically blamed in any situation and this is wrong.
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Morning Tom, did you forget something?
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Godsgift: I don't know. Probably nothing as I would have no idea what was going on between them. Again it would depend on severity but some women have openly admitted to me that they have gone out of their way to provoke fights. Other women such as Cheryl Cole are by their own admission just thugs. She beat her husband senseless though he didn't react. I would have.
I believe society needs to let go of this notion that all women are poor little victims. It is often not the case. Men are automatically blamed in any situation and this is wrong.
I believe society needs to let go of this notion that all women are poor little victims. It is often not the case. Men are automatically blamed in any situation and this is wrong.
You've inspired me.
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It is a difficult one as you are stepping into another man's territory if you interfere between husband and wife or long term partners, and it is a man's natural reaction to defend this. A women intervening is not considered an attack on his territory and is therefore tolerated more.
If the attack is a serious one I would try to restrain the male and reason with him, remembering the law only allows you reasonable force in these circumstances, and indeed in any circumstances.
Remember when dealing with certain types of personalities you may indeed put yourself in the position of serious harm.
I of course would not see someone really seriously injured but it is a difficult situation.
If the attack is a serious one I would try to restrain the male and reason with him, remembering the law only allows you reasonable force in these circumstances, and indeed in any circumstances.
Remember when dealing with certain types of personalities you may indeed put yourself in the position of serious harm.
I of course would not see someone really seriously injured but it is a difficult situation.
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Austgirl71: To him or her
i would slap him from there to japan------ This poll is Archived ------
I`d get involved and give the guy a hand ...
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Austgirl71: Yeah I would to............. A back Hand!!!!!
No two wrongs don't make a right.....
No two wrongs don't make a right.....
Is that two wrongs don't make a right, or is it that it would be an ineffective means of containing the situation?
Its one thing expressing feelings away from a situation, its another actually dealing with it.
Would a back hander promote an effective message to the abuser?
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jac379: Is that two wrongs don't make a right, or is it that it would be an ineffective means of containing the situation?
Its one thing expressing feelings away from a situation, its another actually dealing with it.
Would a back hander promote an effective message to the abuser?
Its one thing expressing feelings away from a situation, its another actually dealing with it.
Would a back hander promote an effective message to the abuser?
Thats right reward the abuser........
No really reward the abuser......I like Massages....
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If it happens in Dubai, I'll call the cops. But in my country I can't call them 'cause they'll only laugh @ me and maybe come to the scene after 2 months, drunk.. So I'll see if he has a weapon on him before stepping forward to help the girl. 
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Balles: If it happens in Dubai, I'll call the cops. But in my country I can't call them 'cause they'll only laugh @ me and maybe come to the scene after 2 months, drunk.. So I'll see if he has a weapon on him before stepping forward to help the girl.
What would happen if a woman abused a man in this manner
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tomcatwarne: What would happen if a woman abused a man in this manner
If he's crippled?
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Balles: If he's crippled?
You mean a woman wouldn't do that to a man there?
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tomcatwarne: You mean a woman wouldn't do that to a man there?
A woman would only yell but won't physically attack a man.
It's not in our nature to beat our men up even though we have huge muscles 
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Balles: A woman would only yell but won't physically attack a man. It's not in our nature to beat our men up even though we have huge muscles
vive l'arab women
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I would be going to jail, and he would be going to the hospital! I would make sure that he would feel my anger towards cowards and my willingness to protect someone. A man that beats up a woman, isn't a man, but a f'ing coward.
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Oregongold: I would be going to jail, and he would be going to the hospital! I would make sure that he would feel my anger towards cowards and my willingness to protect someone. A man that beats up a woman, isn't a man, but a f'ing coward.
I'll post the same thing I posted in the other thread.....
I'd rather be judged by 12 then see a man or woman buried by six who I could have saved.
The question of liability came up. I would rather take the chance of intervening and being charged with assault if I tried to physically break it up. Any court of law in the U.S. would see what I was trying to do and throw the charge out. Part of the problems in the world is people just "talk" about what should be done and then do nothing.
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montemonte: I'll post the same thing I posted in the other thread.....
I'd rather be judged by 12 then see a man or woman buried by six who I could have saved.
The question of liability came up. I would rather take the chance of intervening and being charged with assault if I tried to physically break it up. Any court of law in the U.S. would see what I was trying to do and throw the charge out. Part of the problems in the world is people just "talk" about what should be done and then do nothing.
I'd rather be judged by 12 then see a man or woman buried by six who I could have saved.
The question of liability came up. I would rather take the chance of intervening and being charged with assault if I tried to physically break it up. Any court of law in the U.S. would see what I was trying to do and throw the charge out. Part of the problems in the world is people just "talk" about what should be done and then do nothing.
A friend of mine was beat to death in her apt and people looked thru the window. It was the same complex I lived in. I was at work, and I went off on them when I found out. If you are too much of a coward to get involved in rescuing someone, all I can say is I hope to those who don't help, don't need help one day. I get involved, and yes it FEELS GREAT to help out.
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I can tell you what people did back when I was 22 and my boyfriend had my hair twisted around his one hand with my head pulled back to his shoulder, and with the other hand he had one of my arms twisted behind my back, pushing me down the side of a busy street to his apartment. People on foot stopped to stare and people in cars slowed down to stare. Not one person tried to help.
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99 Votes
2,315 Views
45 Comments
in Advice
Created: Dec 2012
Last Viewed: Apr 27
Last Commented: Jan 2013
Last Voted: Jun 2023
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What would you do if you saw a man physically abusing a woman (girlfriend) in public?(Vote Below)