Do relationships of present times last like relationships of previous decades? ( Archived) (35)

No, relationships of today don't last like the relationships of the past.
There are many different reasons for this and although it sad that so many relationships end and people don't seem to commit, in some cases it is a good thing.
Why is it a good thing? Because in the past women were second class citizens with very few options in life. They could not support themselves so making a good marriage was a very important career move. Either that or join a convent. Those were the choices.
And if she married someone who supported her well financially, it might not have turned out too good on a personal level, but she would put up with that because leaving the marriage was not an option. So they put up with misery so that they and their children would be supported. What a sad life. Thankfully nowadays there is choice, if the relationship is not working. There is no reason to stay in bad relationships. So nowadays women have higher expectations of relationships and if they don't find that perfect relationship they can go it alone if thats their choice.

how the hell are you supposed to know what??

As far as leaving the marriage being an option, I understand what you mean but 44 years ago I made the option to leave my marriage for the safety of myself and my child. You can't wait for things to happen.....you have to make it happen.

The thing about having expectations is that when anyone has expectation of the way it should be, that's when they leave themself open for disappointment.

It's not a comprising world anymore. Our government couldn't compromise on whether we were going to go over the cliff; our employers don't compromise with less pay to save our jobs; and our marital or significant partners don't comprimise to save the vow we made at the altar. They would rather "Sweat The Small Stuff" and give up.

I respect what you've said and it makes so much sence. But here's the problem, because of the ease of having a divorce, people see it as the easy and only way out and in the end some get married several times and still end up alone and wish they had just worked it out the very first time. My advice is people should never have divorce as an option. This is a last resort and should be used only if someone is totally being unfaithful in a relationship. Even in some cases, this could still be worked out. However, there's no excuse or reason to cheat. I think I should ask that on a blog :) xx

Imagine what it was like living in the 19th century...if you were in a voilent marriage..and had children....what were the options?

So which is it, its shouldnt be an option or it should be a if someone is unfaithful?

Divorce over here isnt easy, you have to be 5 years seperated before you can apply for one. And cheating is far from the only reason to end a relationship

But you can't force people to stay married if they are not happy. I agree that it should be a last resort and people should take there vows seriously and not make commitments they don't intend keeping. But people have free will and have to make there own choices. In my country which used to be a strong catholic country , divorce was not allowed until 1995. But that didn't make all the marriages work and didn't make people stay together. People still seperated and began new relationships. People are human, and make mistakes and sometimes need a second chance. Unfortunately, there will always be people who don't take it seriously and casually go from one relationship to another and get married without serious consideration

True, there are many reasons why people need to seperate

well if it make you happy ending relationships no little reasons because of pride am in no position to advice you otherwise. Like my mum used to say, marriage is not for kids. If anyone cant handle the problems that come with marriage then they should never venture into it. Life has a way of balancing us out. You can never be happy all the time. There are also good and bad times. You love someone enough to marry them, then the love would make you patient with them. Love they say conquers all. I might not be in love with anyone right now but I no it does exist and when you do find it, it's not worth throwing away through divorce all cos it seems to be the easy way out. In the long run whether you like it or not you regret it especially when there are kids involved.

Well and you make the lawyers richer and happier!

you got that right......without serious consideration. That's part of the problem. Its very true people make mistakes but if people would put in more work and take the vows really seriously, then we'l get back to the times were divorce used to be really low. People need to understand that they cant always be happy. Life come with problems and happy moments.

It's the same damn thing. People didn't know a damn thing about it then, and they're just as dumb now.

WEll it's obvious that some relationships in this thread aren't doing so well.

No it is not, thats the childish part of you speaking. Read your own post, what are you discussing? You are not, you are telling people what you think and stating it as fact, the fact is that divorce is not always easy and it is immature and disrespectful to people for you to say it is.

Have you started packing for your one way trip to Europe yet?

maybe if you'd smile and talk nice, American women might respond differently

you making me laugh so much. Look for example, you at university studying for a doctorate. u are judged and scored based on ur opinions and wat u consider facts. Doesnt have to be right but thats my opinion. You dont like it then dont take it. It is not disrespectful and i beg ur pardon I seem to be more mature minded than u re. To call someone a kid or call them childish in a discussion is really immature. Focus on the topic and forget about maturity or achievements cos trust me you dont wanna open that door with me. All due respect still given.

No, at University you are judged on your grasp of the actual facts not what you think they are. You are the one not sticking to a discussion, why do you think divorce is easy? Why do you think its the easy option? You havent given any reason other then that you think its true, yo certainly wouldnt get far in University with that attitude.

And dont try enter a battle of wits with me, I dont like to battle with an unarmed opponent.

Okay i shouldnt be conversing with you. Now i never said divorce was easy, i said it is an easy option. If u dont understand the difference then am sorry cant continue trying to explains simple english language stuffs to u. tot u said u were old and got all the experience and brains.

By the ways yes i am young. In fact I am really very young. I am 25 okay. I got a BSc in civil engineering, an MSc and a PhD in petroleum engineering all from the united kingdom. So as for not going far with school, excuse me I got the highest level of education already and my name is Dr Michael :)

dont just go about trying to find a place to hit people thats just not necessary. Like I said what my opinions are are exactly what i said. you got ur opinions? keep it to urself or share with people that want to listen. I understand the sort of person u re already so u can just go on trying to insult but truth be told am sure u got nothing and i mean nothing on me! deal with it and be happy..

lol you are a riot a minute lol.

I take it spelling, grammer and punctuation werent on the curriculum?

Still waiting for you to discuss anything rather than give your opinions are facts, is that actually going to happen at any stage?

I didnt at any stage say I was old.